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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think it's not school's decision?

110 replies

GlitteryRainbow · 25/02/2025 21:08

Somehow I got volunteered to organise the Year 6 Leaver's hoodies. When I looked into it there was a discount available if we ordered by 31st January, so seemed perfect. I got a shop setup everyone ordered on time. I got the order delivered to school because it seemed easier. It was due to arrive in half term so I got it rescheduled. I let the secretary know they would arrive this Monday.

I told my daughter they were coming Monday and she was excited. No hoodie when I came home yesterday. I've been told today that the children can't have their hoodies until May. The parents paid for the hoodies, so AIBU to think that school can't decide when the children get their hoodies? I realise it's their decision when the hoodies can be worn at school. Other schools get them early on and wear them for the entire year. We've never been told that there is time they aren't allowed to wear the hoodies before.

Would I be unreasonable to ask the school to give the hoodies to either myself or the children. We'll agree that the children won't wear them to school before the date the head stipulates. In hindsight I should have just got them delivered to my address.

OP posts:
EVHead · 25/02/2025 21:12

I agree that children/parents should be given the hoodies they’ve paid for, then it’s up to the school to say when they can/can’t wear them.

I think they should get to wear them all year. My local schools all do that and the kids love that feeling of being different to the other years; they often get to choose a colour different to the school uniform as well.

Secondguess · 25/02/2025 21:14

Yes, it's your property, not the school's.

Another reason is that if there are any issues with the orders (wrong sizes/colours/missing items) then the supplier would expect to be informed as soon as possible, which would also allow enough time to sort any mistakes.

Juicyapple44 · 25/02/2025 21:16

All the Schools mine have been to they their received their leavers hoodie on the last day of that school year . Year 6 the school provided them free of charge , year 11 we had to order by end of January they got them just after Easter before they left

madameimadam · 25/02/2025 21:21

Yeah, if you've organised them, then the school should hand them to you.

That said, from experience, once the hoodies go out, the behaviour takes an absolute nosedive as the realisation that they're leaving sinks in.

We let the children wear them to school after SATS are done and dusted.

Farkinhell · 25/02/2025 21:22

When my child left yr 6 parents paid for the hoodies, and kids could wear them from summer term onwards (which we were a bit peeved about as didn't really need jumpers for a lot of that term) but they were handed out in assembly.

Tell them you want them as need to check for errors in print/size. School can of course say they can't wear them till X date which I suppose you'd have to obey, even if you don't really agree with it. But they can't keep hold of them!

Screamingabdabz · 25/02/2025 21:24

Our school didn’t let them have them until they left which was a bit disappointing and pointless imo. However my dd is at uni and still wears her year 11 one so it was actually quite a good buy.

Original poster
GlitteryRainbow · 25/02/2025 21:28

There was a brief discussion of all getting the same colour, but everyone chose their own in the end so they aren't school colours. They do have the school logo on the front though.

OP posts:
Original poster
GlitteryRainbow · 25/02/2025 21:30

Farkinhell · 25/02/2025 21:22

When my child left yr 6 parents paid for the hoodies, and kids could wear them from summer term onwards (which we were a bit peeved about as didn't really need jumpers for a lot of that term) but they were handed out in assembly.

Tell them you want them as need to check for errors in print/size. School can of course say they can't wear them till X date which I suppose you'd have to obey, even if you don't really agree with it. But they can't keep hold of them!

That's a good point we do need to check there aren't any issues with them. Come May it will be too late to do anything about it.

OP posts:
Sinkintotheswamp · 25/02/2025 21:32

Yanbu. I've heard of schools doing this. Just let the pupils have them now. Some of them will probably grow out of them before the end of year 6. I think it's more fun for the children if they have them while still at the school, won't be cool in the autumn.

getthosetitsup · 25/02/2025 21:35

Our primary school wouldn't let them have them until the last week of Y6 when DD got hers.

DS a few years later was the last term of Y6.

From what I've heard, they get them a lot earlier now.

TooManyNiblings · 25/02/2025 21:35

We haven't even ordered ours yet!!
I think your mistake was having them delivered to school, I think schools take ownership at that point and will keep hold until they see fit to distribute.

PicaK · 25/02/2025 21:38

So you just expected the office staff to receive this parcel, manhandled it into the office, open it and sort them out into classes and sizes and match them all up to the right kid and then the teachers to hand them all out?!!
On the first day back after the hols when they're up to their eyes with backlog?!!
And you're taking your child's "May" as gospel - perhaps they said next month.

Suggest flowers or chocolate, straight to the office, huge thanks and say you'll take them home and sort them out and would it be OK to bring them back labellec for each class and child.
And check with the Head when they are happy for them to be worn in school.

Original poster
GlitteryRainbow · 25/02/2025 21:39

TooManyNiblings · 25/02/2025 21:35

We haven't even ordered ours yet!!
I think your mistake was having them delivered to school, I think schools take ownership at that point and will keep hold until they see fit to distribute.

I know that now but I didn't want to have to go somewhere to collect the parcel or have to rearrange delivery or whatever. I thought get it delivered to school then they can give them out and the kids can wear them. Clearly not though.

As I said we ordered ours because we got a discount. Presumably because it helps the company spread production throughout the year.

OP posts:
madameimadam · 25/02/2025 21:40

Sinkintotheswamp · 25/02/2025 21:32

Yanbu. I've heard of schools doing this. Just let the pupils have them now. Some of them will probably grow out of them before the end of year 6. I think it's more fun for the children if they have them while still at the school, won't be cool in the autumn.

It may be more fun for the children but not for the staff!!

Honestly, once the hoodies go out, all bets are off!!

And, how can I put this delicately?? Some of them are never washed.... It's great that the children love them but dear god, in the warmer summer months, it can get a little ripe 🤢

(My tongue is slightly in my cheek. We're a school that allow children to wear them to school. If your school isn't, the above doesn't apply )

NorthernGirlie · 25/02/2025 21:42

I had absolute hell on when I did the Year 6 hoodies. I got wind that the Head was going to withhold them until the day the kids left, so I intercepted the delivery and 1 of the other parents took them in for me.

She handed them out to the kids and the Head went crazy - rang me to tell.me I'd no idea what I'd done, that the kids would go ferral and turn into hooligans...

Original poster
GlitteryRainbow · 25/02/2025 21:43

There's half a class and they come with name labels on, that was part of the ordering process. They could just put the box by the door and let the kids pick theirs out on the way out. Or they could have given it to one of the year 6 parents to give out. I don't think that they will be manhandling a box with 13 hoodies in it. I'm not taking my child's word for it, I've heard directly from a member of staff.

OP posts:
Hankunamatata · 25/02/2025 21:44

Iv done school hoodies for years. Usually we check them and keep them in school and hand them out last month of term as school will only let kids wear them in the last month of school. Avoids arguments and complaints that their kids being told not to wear the hoodies in school

Original poster
GlitteryRainbow · 25/02/2025 21:48

Hankunamatata · 25/02/2025 21:44

Iv done school hoodies for years. Usually we check them and keep them in school and hand them out last month of term as school will only let kids wear them in the last month of school. Avoids arguments and complaints that their kids being told not to wear the hoodies in school

If school have a rule that the kids can't wear hoodies before a certain time then this should be communicated to the parents, before they have ordered hoodies. The kids are involved in ordering because they chose the colour and their nickname fore the back. So have some idea that they will arrive soon.

OP posts:
Original poster
GlitteryRainbow · 25/02/2025 21:49

Actually the most annoying thing is that the school haven't bothered to tell me that there is an issue. I've had to hear via another member of staff.

OP posts:
ElfAndSafetyBored · 25/02/2025 21:50

At my child’s school, the hoodies were school colour (green) and the kids had them around Easter and could wear them as their school jumper from then on.

It was great as the kids felt special but still looked within the uniform.

Plus it meant they got proper use out of them - how many are going to wear their primary school jumper after they hit high school?

PicaK · 25/02/2025 21:52

If you make school hand them out - and parents have paid for them - they have to do it properly or they'll get the flack if one goes missing.
And even if only 15 hoodies, it's still a bulky parcel.
Sounds like you have little appreciation of the office staff at all or respect for the Head. It's not school uniform so of course the Head will say when it's allowed to be worn.

DappledThings · 25/02/2025 21:55

Plus it meant they got proper use out of them - how many are going to wear their primary school jumper after they hit high school?
I always wonder this. I only started seeing these hoodies a few years ago. I imagine 90% of them get abandoned after only a few weeks. Seems entirely pointless to me. Had no idea some schools actually let them wear them instead of uniform.

If my DC genuinely want one when we get there I'll buy one but I wont be encouraging it. Looks like a total waste of money.

sunshineandshowers40 · 25/02/2025 21:56

Have they not all got a hoodie? I'm sure we all paid a bit more to cover families who couldn't/didn't pay, so everyone had one.

If you paid for them school should give them to you. Most local primary schools here give them out after SATs, they are allowed to wear them to school (hoodie is in the school's colour) but behaviour does become trickier to manage!

Sunat45degrees · 25/02/2025 21:59

This annoys the shit out f me. For practical reasons. Year 6 is ridiculously expensive with all the extras, including the hoodies. I ahve NO problem with the school not wanting hoodies worn at school.. I DO have a problem with forking over £28 for a hoodie my child then wears for half a term. Because they DON'T wear them after they leave. Maybe, if you're lucky, over the summer holiday. But once they hit high school, that's it, never again. when DD hits year 6 I will be lobbying for hoodies that are produced earlier!

Bagpuss2022 · 25/02/2025 22:01

my daughter never wore her y6 on it was boiling when they got them after the may half term
so I don’t know why they can’t have them now really waste of money