Do I want a dog?? Do you regret having one?

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I love dogs so much! But I am very aware that they are a huge commitment that is years and years long and I don’t want to commit to having one unless I am absolutely certain I can be a good dog owner.

I can and do work from home most of the time, although there are days when I go in to my office - it’s very flexible.
I love getting out for long walks.
I have a 7 year old daughter who is very calm and loves animals
I have a small garden
I like to go for breaks away when I can fit them in
Weekends can be changed to fit around having a dog but I don’t always go to dog friendly places with my DD
The hair shedding and potentially being woken up early doors would bother me
I earn well and could afford to pay a dog walker if needs be - would get pet insurance obviously and vet bills wouldn’t be an issue
I wouldn’t get a puppy. I prefer medium to large breeds - would like to get a rescue if I can but don’t know if it would be better to get a dog whose background I am aware of if that makes sense?

Or should I just get a cat?!!

Talk me out of it please!!

might be worth having a "trial" first - borrowmydoggy.com is absolutely fantastic!

I have a dog, I love him to bits and he is spoiled rotten. He's 12 and lives the best life he can ask for. But when he's gone, I won't get another. I want to be able to go whenever, wherever and for as long as I want. When I want to go, I have to think of the dog before booking anything

I love my dog, but as PPs have said, he does restrict our lives in certain ways. We got a puppy and were able to work from home the first six months, so he wasn't left alone until he was happy and confident to be on his own. Which is just as well, as he's a bit nervy and we soon realised was NOT a candidate for doggy daycare. We'd assumed we'd use a local daycare, but when we visited it was not very secure or well run, and only seemed to work well for bigger dogs. We've been lucky to get local dogwalkers who take him out, plus a friend he can go and stay with when we're on holiday. But we have to work round when friends are available for our holidays. At weekends most dog walkers don't work so you have to plan days out to be back in time, or where you can take the dog. As I said, my dog quite likes staying home alone (he just sleeps), so that's okay as long as we factor in time to walk him, but some dogs would not cope with that and you don't know what kind you're going to end up with.

I don't think rescues generally lie about the dogs they rehome, but it's also just the case that dogs behave differently in different places, and it can take a rescue dog a while to settle down and for their full personality to come out. So they can legitimately say 'this dog is toilet trained and doesn't mind being left alone' if that's what they've observed, but that's no guarantee it'll be true at your house.

I think a good way to decide this is to sit down and work out all the practicalities. Who looks after the dog if you need to go out for the day, away for the week, called back in to work in office full time - what options are there nearby, how much are they, what options are further afield if they are all full? How much is food, insurance, vet bills?
Do you have time to commit to training properly - how will you train a dog so they don't suffer separation anxiety (it's not all sit and stay) if you are at home with them all the time - loads of great resources online for this, but read through them and work out if you are able to give the time commitment!

My world is forever changed for the better with my dog, but everyone i know who regrets it didn't do enough of the above research or eventuality planning!

If you're already concerned about dog hair everywhere, add in mud, saliva and the occasional upset stomach. How does that make you feel ?

And you might love long walks but what about the short, round the block walks in every weather, at least twice a day, every day ? That you'll have to drag the kids out on ?

Dogs can be an absolute joy and I wouldn't be without one but too many people have an idyllic idea of what life will be like and yes, it will be amazing, and fabulous and enriching but I guarantee that there will also be tears, heartbreak and frustration. 10-16 possible years of life changing companionship.

Can you dogsit for anyone to see how you feel about having one in your space before you commit to having one in your life ?

We got a dog as my DH wfh full time and me much of the time. Apart from hair, paws, digging in the garden, chewing of all my slippers and trainers (when a puppy) I wouldn't change a thing, she's awesome!
We also have 3 cats and the boy cats get in great with the dog ... girl cat not so much (she's a grump who hates the boy cats too!)
It's never going to be perfect but you can adjust your weekends away like we did, loads of places allow dogs these days, going to central Edinburgh soon with the dog!

You should post this in Dogshouse and read some of the threads there of the issues and struggles people have had with rescue centres (i) pressurising them to take dogs after only one meeting, (ii) lying about the dogs behaviour (iii) matching dogs to completely inappropriate families (iv) no support once the dog is in your home. Breed specific ones are better. Lots won't rehome to families if you're not there 5 days a week of have children.

Just because people love their dogs and wouldn't be without them, doesn't mean it's not hard.

With a rescue, as with a puppy, you're looking at three months settling - i.e. not leaving them for more than a few minutes - in time before you can begin to work on leaving them for long (or you're going to be in for a very tough time with separation anxiety).

I love my dog and he's not my first one, but times change and we have more spare money now for holidays/days out which it would be nice to do last minute without being tied by the dog. I'm really at the stage in my life where I'd love a nice clean house too.. so this will be our last dog

Get a cat! I have dogs but they are farm dogs and live in the barn, I’d never have a dog in the house. Cats can come in the house, (though ours chooses to live outside with the feral cats) without making mess. They clean themselves, they don’t smell. They use a litter box. When you go out for the day or even overnight you can leave them. Week a way, a neighbour can stop by to feed them. So much easier

One of mine cost £12K last year-broken leg, genetic issue which would not have been seen on any x ray, so both fores were pinned after a 'catastrophic' break of one leg. We have had back almost £8K but had to pay up front for everything and it's taken almost a year to get the £8K back. We were very fortunate to have that money available as the insurance doesn't liaise directly with the specialist for that kind of money (our local vet does but doesn't have the equipment/surgeons for this).

Mine are very energetic, shed like there's tumbleweed and cost lots for the dog walker, only needed for a few days each month due to DH's work pattern, but think hard! We have limited ourselves to UK holidays because we're soppy and I would be paranoid to leave them, even with a superb person I know in a great set up. I am happy to stay in the UK, happy to have an occasionally filthy house post muddy walk. They are totally spoilt (but obviously trained and fabulous dogs) and I think that's fine. They entertain me and give back loads, but cats are far easier!

Get 2 cats. Then you and DD aren't limited for days out and there's generally not the same level of noise.
Cats are usually happier in pairs if kept that way from a young age.

Make friends with another couple who have a dog. I have had a number of 'god dogs'. All the fun (sunny afternoon walks/ sneaky treats/being a pub dog) - none of vet bills/training/6am walks in the rain.

We have the dogs to stay every so often And that reminds us of why we don't want one of our own....

That reminds me - I need to mop up some muddy paw prints from the weekend

I have a miniature poodle, so no shedding. She never disturbs herself in the morning until I come downstairs to put the kettle on.

She’s an amazing dog, so intelligent, easy to train and loving. She loves her twice daily walks and gets on with other dogs.

The only downsides are the cost and the tie. If you’re well off and don’t want dog free holidays then fine. Don’t underestimate the cost of owning a dog. Everything is expensive, these days but vet bills have rocketed. Then there’s food, beds, toys, groomers. Owning a dog is expensive!

Many holiday destinations in the U.K. now welcome dogs. I would never leave my dog but there are ways that you might find acceptable.

I've had cats for the last 40 years and I have a dog who is almost 14 and although I love and have loved them all I only said to DH a few days ago I really feel they may be our last pets. I will miss them enormously when we lose them but I won't be looking to replace them. I feel we need a break from pets and then we may reconsider although I would be quite keen to do some volunteer dog walking for The Cinnamon Trust.

I love my dog to pieces. She makes me (and my kids) smile every day and I wouldn't be without her. Our lives are definitely better because of her.

Having any animal is a responsibility, the same a having a child. It will quite probably be messy, at times disruptive and definitely expensive. Fingers crossed it will also be very rewarding, funny, loving and give you and your DD the best memories.

Only you can decide if it's the right decision for your family but from my point of view I would go for it.

I absolutely love dogs and would never be without one, they bring me so much joy. My DD is 8 and she’s also never known life without a dog. I always have rescues and they’ve all been amazing (some need more patience but they’ve all come good).

They don’t ask for much but they are a tie, holidays for us are camping with an abroad hol every few years. He comes camping with us & the rest of our friends have dogs too. You have to be mindful of getting back to walk them/feed the and vets bills are VERY expensive. You do have to get up quite early as they need walking. If you’re fully prepared for the responsibility & commitment for the dogs whole life, I think they’re absolutely worth it.

My summary would be that dogs bring joy to your life, but at a price.

^^ This really. We went into it with our eyes wide open for our first dog. She's almost three now and there are times when I think another 11 years .... It is like having another child just marginally cheaper who is never fully toilet trained and you still have to take them out when it's bucketing rain like a toddler or they'll do your head in 😀

The costs are pretty lumpy these days. You can afford a dog walker? Can you afford all day dog care when you go to the office at £30 a pop. What if that changes to 3+ days? A retired greyhound or older dog might be ok to leave all day with a dog walker coming in but not the average mid to large size breed at a young or active age.
As a guide our two week holiday this year is costing us £780 in dog care incl VAT . We've holidayed in the UK for the past two years and taken her with us. That's been lovely but a very different style of holiday.
Insurance, vaccinations, worming, flea treatment. That's £75 per month.
Food - about £75 a month plus treats.

We love her, but she is a tie that we have to work our lives around and she is expensive [and still young and healthy]

We also have cats. They walk themselves, occasionally bring us "treats" and are just getting to an age where they are considering a warm lap might be a treat rather than being out and about all night haring around. Vet's subscription is about £17 pm per cat, food about £60 per month for two. How friendly the average cat is is very dependent on their personality and I thoroughly recommend a decent cat rescue place to help match you with the right cat.

@Chiseltip that’s not been my experience in volunteering at a rescue for years. Where are you getting those stats? MN generally hates dogs.
The majority have been taken in because of vet costs, divorces, deaths, illness of owner. The history of the animal is also held. This does depend on the rescue though- as I’ve found out. Our local rescue is amazing.

I don’t think you really want a dog OP, but cats aren’t the magical unicorn house guest either. You have to keep them inside a good few weeks, meaning you need a litter tray and will have to clean it. They’ll probably vomit, or have an accident at some point- just being realistic. If you go away, are you happy to install an automatic feeder/ cat flap/ or get someone to pop by and feed them and make sure they are ok.

Lots of what you say sounds perfect for a dog, but I’m just not getting the vibe you’d love one. They are a tie, they are a commitment. They should only be left 4 hours (if older, like a lot older then potentially more). My old lab literally would sleep for 8 hours straight during the day but he was 12, that doesn’t mean I would have left him that long though as I don’t think it’s right and it just fell in with my lifestyle). He lived to 14. They need company and love. Or you need back up like granny/grandad-or a trusted friend that will look after your dog on night out, emergency.

My Lab was so chilled out though, he loved going to stay with nanny because she gave him a whole roast dinner at least twice a week 🙄which meant he had to go on a little diet when he came back! My MIL has a bichon and he is a little twat.
He cannot be left, he screams the house down. If we have him, we have to take him out and even then he’s a bugger. He pees on her bed when she goes out as punishment!

I’ve not long lost my dog and I know I’ll get another, I know that right now. The house is empty, I hate it. I want to be woken by a cold wet nose, deal with hair, go out all weathers. (Are you sure your DD will do that?) I’m not lokk ok img forward to vet bills and insurance lol but it’s a small price to pay for a family member.

My dog is the absolute soul of the family...we all love her so much. It's taken me by surprise just how much she's at the centre of everything...but...

• just so much work, especially the puppy stage.
• took a lot of work for her to comfortable being left alone
• we have fleece blanket throws over EVERYTHING as she's such a mud monster
• absolutely no recall for me. Dog walker? Total angel. Me? It's taken 3 years. Now she's fab. But it was a long 3 years.
• food, bills, time.
• no flexibility. Any child free time, holidays etc etc have to also arrange dog sitter (who she adores)
• days out to e.g cinema or bowling takes lots of planning
• chewing!! And the stealing of legos, socks, pants. Mostly grown out of now, but again took a lot of training.
• the car has also been taken over with blankets, towels, etc etc.

...in my experience, all completely 100% worth it though.

I don't regret getting my dog but I won't get another one when she is gone. It is a huge investment of time - even two short walks a day is an hour of your time. It very much limits your movements, and it makes going on holiday difficult. All the decent dog boarders around me are booked up many months in advance in the school holidays.

I would also think carefully about getting a rescue. IME rescues are complex and tend to either have problems with people or with other dogs. My dog is a rescue and isn't great with people so we can't really bring her places and when people come round we have to shut her in a bedroom. I am very glad that she came to us and has a nice life with people who understand and love her, but she's not exactly easy going.

Ours is my best friend ❤️

He’s the bestest boy ever. I don’t find him hard work at all, but I must say we have 2 horses, so compared to them he’s sooooo easy and cheap 😂

I love my dog but I do regret becoming a dog owner.

Also, anecdotally, first dogs tend to be quite hard work because the owner is less likely to know what they’re doing right from the beginning.

And you might love long walks but what about the short, round the block walks in every weather, at least twice a day, every day ? That you'll have to drag the kids out on ?

That is one of the things I say to anyone who mentions getting a dog to me.

Before getting a dog, for 6 weeks, go out for 2 x 15-20 minute walks a day, and do this no matter what the weather, no matter how tired you are, whether you’ve had a busy day at work, if you’re unwell, no matter what other commitments or what else you’ve got going on each day. Give it a try, see if you last the whole 6 weeks.

Yes and no.

The responsibility is huge, daily dog walking regardless of weather or feelings, expensive, needy, very much like a child, before anyone pounces I have children and they're similar. 😀

My flooring has never been the same, dog hair too.

I absolutely adore our springer spaniel but I won't be getting another dog again, maybe in retirement years, other times I'm looking at abandoned dogs in rescues wondering, would two dogs be so bad?

I feel very similar to this. I have a 5 HR old child and my dog is 11 this year and I wouldn't be getting another dog when he has passed. Life was easier with a dog before children but it can be tricky to balance needs of all.