Phone/devices on train - without headphones

[rosemarble]

I don't know why the sound from a phone or other device when someone's watching YouTube or films drives me batty.
I'm on a fairly busy train, trying to read. People are talking and laughing and I can tune that out, but I can't tune out the device noise. It doesn't bother DS at all. Is it just cos I didn't grow up with it? Maybe I am harbouring feelings that it's antisocial to force your own entertainment on others?

The Eurostar asks people to wear headphones so I don't think it's just me being uptight.

4 hours of it the other day, on a remote rural train line, where it's actually pleasant to listen to the clickety clack of the rails. I put my earphones in but could still hear the 💩 he/she was playing. Ignored their children for most of the journey and small girl (approx 4 or 5) was swinging from the seat arm rests at a few points. They were right in the centre of the carriage and we were at the far end.

Don’t even start me on people holding a phone like a Kardashian on the Apprentice having a telephone call on loud speaker in public.

This really gives me the rage. I start to fantasise about knocking the phone out of their hand and stamping on it. And I fear that one day my self-control will fail and I'll actually do it...

Have seen several men and a couple of young women become confrontational when asked to stop this. It’s a provocative, domineering thing to do. IMO it’s ignored because people fear the confrontation and aggression.

Moving is often not an option at busy times.

It's entitled and rude. And it's happening increasingly frequently. I commute by train twice a week, two hours each way. It's noticeable how many inconsiderate people use public transport.

It's a very weird phenomenon that seems to come from the recent increase in individualism, the idea that I can do whatever I want and it's an enfringement of my liberty to stop me. But failing to recognise that they are doing the exact same to everyone else who has the music or whatever imposed on them. It's especially weird in this scenario because noone is actually stopping you listening to whatever you like, just use headphones.

Completely. I asked someone on a London bus the other day who was blaring out Backstreet Boys on her phone to turn it down.

It was so loud that I couldn’t hear the podcast I was listening to with my headphones.

She looked at me as if I was an alien with two heads when I asked her: it was clear she had never before confronted the concept that listening to music in public might be antisocial and then she turned it down rapidly.

It occurred to me that the people who do this are now the second generation of people who think it’s normal and acceptable because their parents did it themselves and don’t see it as strange or rude. My parents would have torn me a new one for doing this: I wasn’t allowed even to listen to my Walkman in the car…

We are now two generations into a society which is completely atomised from a sense of normal behavior and sees consideration for the needs of others as totally a la carte.

It drives me nuts. I can't remember the last time I got a train and no one was playing music loudly on their phone or having a phone conversation with the loudspeaker on. It's so antisocial but it now seems totally commonplace. It used to just be teenagers but it's people of all ages now.

I always ask people who fo tgst to rither turn the volune off or put on their headphones.
it s called respect of one another.

same fir kids with cartooons ir games with volumes. My kids were always told volume off or headphones

You're not uptight and YANBU. It's frankly antisocial and I don't understand how it became so commonplace seemingly overnight. Everyone does it, and everywhere. Most bewildering for me was at the lounge/bar space in a hotel, very quiet, just a few people having either hot drinks or a quiet glass of wine, and here's also this very well dressed middle aged man watching a football game on his phone on full volume. Just absolutely bonkers.

I asked a mum and a kid on train yesterday to turn down his gaming device, i also carry cheap spare headphones which i offer

Please ask people politely to turn the sound down. I have PTSD and it triggers panic attacks for me, I think because I have no control over what noises might happen or how loud they will be. Honestly it is terrifying. I am thinking about carrying spare cheap headphones to hand out just to stop people doing it.

People often don’t respond well to being politely asked to stop it.

I was in a nice cafe having lunch a couple of years ago. Only me (40 something) and a single man in that part of the cafe. He started watching YouTube videos without headphones. I politely asked if he minded turning the sound down. He glared but did so. On leaving he told me I was rude (!!) and he was completely within his rights to be doing so.

Bring on the signs I saw in Japan asking people to be considerate of others in public places

I’ve never asked anyone to turn it down as invariably I have my own AirPods in but one time I had lent them to my son and asked for them back as 2 girls boarded the train listening to videos and he asked why, I said “because I don’t want to listen to their TikToks” and I could see them glare at me and mouth off. At least I couldn’t hear them though.

People are pig ignorant these days. Same as theatre goers who come in late, talk/sing through performances, record on their phones, and can’t sit on their arse without disturbing the whole row every 5 minutes

I do just disagree with this - if your child can’t wear headphones, the. Sorry they can’t have the volume up on their device. It’s not fair on everyone else to have to listen to some tinny noise through an iPad.

That’s awful , people need to be able to rest and recuperate, nurses should disallow it

Agree - but they don't seem to have the authority

Are you in hospital right now? I would ask to speak to ward sister and say you’re not able to relax or rest and if they can’t ask people to not unnecessarily disturb others with noise then you’ll file formal complaint.

I completely agree with this, a belt and braces approach is not only get staff to tackle absolute idiots like this but also good quality eye mask and ear plugs are a must for a hospital stay. Meant I actually managed to snatch a tiny bit of sleep after having my 2nd baby!

This is the absolute best idea. I think only in a situation like this where they all have to listen to a cacophony of each other's tinny shite will the penny drop and the self absorbed twats will realise how bloody annoying it is.

I'd be so interested to hear what a nurse says about this. Where is the bar drawn on what they can intervene with?
Can they ask visitors to be quiet, or to leave if there are too many?
Can they ask patients to...I don't know...throw food all over the floor or tip shampoo on the bed?
What comes under the umbrella of making sure your patients are as comfortable as possible to enable good rest and recovery?

I think the people doing it sort of think others don't notice/ don't mind. And they don't care. And if no one says anything then it must be fine, right?

WRONG on every level!

If I'm sitting beside them I lean over and look at what the video is. Then they realise and put the put the phone on silent. I don't care if I look like a weirdo as they are being really antisocial.

I did ask a woman on the tube if she had headphones one morning. Really loud video playing. Other people were pissed off too. She looked puzzled then turned the sound off.

I absolutely agree with this, and in my view there also needs to be more intervention from “the authorities” - train guards, drivers making announcements, cafe and restaurant staff.

However one important caveat- often the people I see doing it are youths or those with mental health issues who might respond aggressively. I, very sadly, have experience of a family member being stabbed when they tried to intervene to stop antisocial behaviour. It’s important to think very carefully and not put yourself in danger.

Had this on a place recently. Micropenis man and child (maybe around 5 or 6) sitting behind me and child initially begins opening the tray table and slamming it back into place. I ask for this to stop and it does.

Child then begins to watch a device on loud, to the extent that I can hear the inane noise above whatever I'm watching with my headphones in. I turn around and say, "that needs turning down or turning off." He replies indignantly, "you could say please!".

My response . . ."A-ha! So you think that your rudeness should be met with smiles and politeness, do you? Good luck with that, bud. What a shining example you are". DH was mortified, but arseholes like this need calling out. It's usually me that challenges it - the older I get the fewer shits I give.

It's horrendous and drives me nuts. Why are people so inconsiderate and rude?

I had it recently on a plane, they had the ipad on full volume, so Little Johnny could watchband cartoon. Get earphones for God's sake!