To be fed up with 'vegan' kids?

[bakingmads]

We live in an area where it's become fashionable to be vegan gluten free. We know a few kids who are allowed to eat whatever outside the house. I've noticed these kids have an unhealthy relationship with food. They seem obsessed! They never stop eating and if they see meat, it's insane to watch. I've even witnessed a child stealing food from other's plates!

I think if they follow such a strict diet at home because they believe that it's healthier, then why let the kids eat meat outside the house?

It's got a to point where we don't invite them for play dates because they don't seem to want to play just eat.

Not sure if I should mention something to the parents. Is it normal for a child to eat non stop?

Mine are at a tiny catholic school and currently no requests for halal or kosher, but yeah, exactly. It's really very simple. We do have a no sesame rule though, so argh, no houmous!

Are they overweight? They are probably protein deprived if vegan and gluten free. Their body is probably craving things due to malnutrition.

Well prsumably the non 'vegan and gf' kids also like meat and bread. If they can eat whatever is offered at other people's houses then what difference does it make if they have restrictions at home.

If they want extra portions of meat and bread just say there isn't any left, or it's for another day.

Most gf people I know are celiac or intolerant or if vegan then it's to do with animal cruelty and health concerns. So they would be unwell or very unhappy if they ate those things.

Would you prefer if they insisted you prepared them totally separate meals? Because surely that would be more annoying to you?
Just treat them as if they are meat and gluten eaters.

Sounds like those threads about kidswho aren't allowed sweets at home and then stuff themselves with sweets until they're sick whenever they are invited somewhere. I've never actually seen it happen in RL.

Actually, vegan food is just as filling as non-vegan. I doubt it's the diet that's causing the problem. A vegan diet doesn't make you lose the ability to know when you're full. Either you're exaggerating, or there's something seriously wrong at home for the kids to be so hungry.

They're not vegan.

Doesn't sound like OP would have an issue if they were vegan tbh

I’ve been vegan myself for 8 years and I agree. I have been a single mum since the day my son was born (left my abuser during pregnancy) so technically it would have been easier to raise him vegan. But I refused to, it’s a choice for me to follow this lifestyle - I want my son to make his own decisions himself. You also have to be very clued up on the vegan diet and its nutrients to put that on a child to grow up healthy and unfortunately I don’t think many vegan parents understand that and the kids grow up without what they need.

What also put me off was that I dated a boy as a teenager who him and his sister grew up vegetarian since birth. As soon as they were at the age to ‘rebel’ they would be bingeing on McDonald’s and hiding it behind their parents back. Because they had been withheld all this food, they developed a really bad relationship with it in adulthood to make up for ‘lost time’ and as far as I know they never went back to vegetarian.

Nothing can taste great without cheese

There are a number of issues here - in some ways they don’t apply because the OP has stopped inviting these particular children round.

Eating/requiring Gluten free and vegan are usually for different reasons - medical and belief respectively - usually.

How does the OP know they don’t need gluten free. Would she/he feed nuts to a child who says they are allergic to them because she/he doesn't think they are? Or just a little bit won’t hurt.

Veganism is or can be different. For many it is a belief, feeding them non vegan food is akin to feeding bacon to a Jew or Muslim - a lack of respect.
Some vegans are possibly such because of allergies and its easier to say vegan than ‘oh I’m allergic to eggs, milk, chicken etc.

I was vegetarian long before we had children. Brought them up vegetarian - but they were free to eat what they wanted at others’ houses, in town etc. I don’t think they did very often - but no compulsion.

Two rebelled as older teenagers - as teenagers often do. They went vegan.
They dairy shamed us into going vegan 10 years ago.

More worrying is their eating like a starving dog, wolfing food down - any food.
Maybe it might be sensible to mention this to their parents - in a subtle and kind way - with no judgements on their actual domestic diet.

Just give them veggies and humous. It's not hard!

I think she’s saying that all they really want to do when they go to her home is eat all the food she has that they’re not getting at home. It’s not her responsibility to feed them and by the sound of it it’s costing her a fortune and they’re not playing but just eating her food. And no, people shouldn’t make speciial meals for kids coming over for a play date. I wouldn’t have them over again but if you do, set up a little snack tray with a few items that they can eat and tell them everything else is off limits and to not come into your kitchen unless invited by you.

Just make them sandwiches with meat in.

Some families are obviously just proper weird, why would you let your kids do that and then insist they eat vegan/gluten free at home, how tiresome

A massive pile of spam sandwiches won't cost much.

I’m not vegan, but I know that if done currently, it’s nutritious and tasty. I agree that your perception sounds limited.

You can get gluten free pasta and bread so why on earth would they not be able to eat this at home??? Also, there are vegan replacements for almost everything so I doubt they aren’t full … they won’t be living on salad!

Maybe they just eat more than your kids so you aren’t used to it. Could be more active or just enjoy their food. Just because someone lives their lift differently to you doesn’t make them weird or a pain. If it bothers you that much then don’t invite them any more but you’ll have a lonely lift if you can’t spend time with someone who doesn’t act in the same what that you do, or that you expect.
So sick on vegan bashing and I’m not even vegan. It’s like those who eat meat need to put those who don’t down to defend their own choices as if they have a guilt complex!

100% … chuck a pizza or nuggets in the oven everyday and you’re a busy mum … or struggling with the cost of living. Make a kid vegan and you’re a child abuser!!!

I’ve was a,ways a believer that if you denied certain foods your kids would go to other people’s houses and bc gluttons. They do bc gluttons bc denial is a forbidden thing and it makes things so much desirable.

This isn’t a diet issue, it’s a behaviour issue or a being underfed issue. Both are bad parenting (unless there is a medical reason). I’d definitely have a word with the parents and I’d re-examine all the times you met the family /kids to see if there are any alarm bells which need reporting (the extreme hunger makes me wonder whether the child is getting 3 meals a day).

Are you sure that they’re “allowed” to eat whatever they like outside of the house? I guess it depends if it really is a “trend” or whether these children do have gluten intolerances or whether their parents are trying to encourage strict morals. I would say it’s probably worth mentioning to the parents, but I wouldn’t convey it as annoyance, but more of a concern. Just in case the parents aren’t aware of what the child is eating outside of the home. It could potentially be harmful to them, or if it’s not and these restrictions are made from a moral stand point, the parent may not realise how desperately the children seems to want to eat meat, and could maybe cater for them a bit more at home, or budget for them to eat out if they’re not comfortable with cooking meat in the home, or simply have a discussion with them about appropriate manners when eating at others houses.

OP i hate vegan bashing in general but I also get frustrated by this particular problem. We have friends where the mum is vegan and they eat vegan food at home but the husband and rest of the family eat meat out of the home.
Whenever they come for a bbq or similar situation with other friends, I make sure I cater vegan food(often the mother will check/ask whether to bring their own). However, in reality I have to prepare for the fact that the husband and two of the children will eat a HUGE AMOUNT of any meat that is available(far more that anyone else). I make sure I factor it in to my food order. The whole situation seems v bizarre.

What am I reading?
Firstly it's not a fashion. There are lots of kids who are allergic to gluten or coeliac and so have to have a gluten free diet. Same with being allergic to dairy and egg so being vegan is easier. Have you ever thought to yourself the kids don't realise? My daughter is 3 and is only just getting to grasps with her allergies and if it's not for me being there she would eat whatever is around not realising. Have you had a chat with the parents and asked if the kids are allergic or have medical conditions as to why they are vegan and gluten free?

That is definitely something that I account for when the whole family comes over.

But my issue is the kids don't wait for lunch or dinner to be served. They roam the kitchen and will eat anything that's around saying they're starving. Or taking food off others plates having polished theirs really fast.

In my opinion it is child abuse and cruel to children for parents to inflict a vegan diet on a child - its selfish and cruel, and basically malnourishing a child, and I really don't give a fluck what anyone says back to me, and I won't engage in any replies. It leads to disordered eating much like a 100% sugar-free household has kids stuffing sweets at other kids homes and at school, and/or sneaking sweets at home. Children need a balanced diet especially dairy. Its just pure cruelty and selfish and they're giving their children a complex.