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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Mum putting Movicol in water bottle at school, would you tell the school?

250 replies

Dramatic · 09/02/2025 18:19

So one of the Mums at the school gate was telling me her daughter gets constipated sometimes and when she does she puts Movicol in her water bottle for school. The kids are in Reception so age 4 or 5 and probably still of an age where they might take a swig from someone else's bottle or get their bottles mixed up, do you think I should tell school she's doing this or just keep out of it?

Yabu - don't tell school
Yanbu - tell school

OP posts:
Original poster
Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:22

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:19

I’ll also say to @AubernFable - as the parent of a disabled child you wouldn’t believe how much I have to bow, scrape and beg for the tiniest scrap of respect and acknowledgement. How I have to feel like I owe people an apology or that I should express remorse for a condition my son doesn’t deserve and didn’t ask for. So as a professional I’d expect you NOT to take such smug pride on the fact you’d give a parent dirty looks and laugh at them for expecting the school to medicate a disabled child properly. I feel like you would enjoy the power trip of saying no.

Youd also be the one dealing with the pain, screaming and heartache and literal shit sometimes from my DS if his medication was held back from him. But hey as long as you can feel important fuck the children you look after right? Thank Christ my son’s school is more understanding!

But hey if advocating for my son to be medicated properly is being a “nightmare parent” then so what - I can cope with that label

Edited

I think she was reacting to your attitude of not giving a single fuck about anyone else's child. And the fact you'd be "telling" school what they will do rather than working with them to come up with a plan that takes in to account they're in a school setting

OP posts:
JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:23

Nothing you’ve said is particularly nice. You’ve been VERY proud of the fact you laugh at needs for disabled children and call those who want their children to not be in pain a “nightmare”

And I would continue to advocate for the school to fulfil their duty to follow his medical plan.

I do care about other peoples children because I care about other people generally, that really shouldn’t be hard to fathom

You care so much you laugh at their medical plans? Sure

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:23

Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:14

I have no desire to stick the boot in to anyone, I get on very well with her. As someone who used to work in a childcare setting it just set off some small alarm bells because we would have never been allowed to have medication floating about in water bottles that other kids could have access to that's all.

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We’ll be a grown up and have a conversation with her then if you get on with her so we’ll.

AubernFable · 10/02/2025 23:23

Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:22

I think she was reacting to your attitude of not giving a single fuck about anyone else's child. And the fact you'd be "telling" school what they will do rather than working with them to come up with a plan that takes in to account they're in a school setting

Edited
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Absolutely right OP, thank you.

AimeeBern · 10/02/2025 23:24

Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:19

Well my child and her child aren't the only kids in the class and I'm fairly sure not all of them are on Movicol. I never said I was worried about my child drinking it. But apparently it's a very alien concept to be concerned about other children.

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But concerned about what? This is what everyone keeps saying. A sip of Movocol is harmless and tastes bad, so no one will be "accidentally" having more than one sip. If you're concerned, all that needed to happen was for you to say to the teacher "hey, X mentioned their kid is having Movocol in their bottle - could you keep an extra eye on it to make sure no one drinks it by mistake" and then you get on with your life. This isn't EastEnders - why does everyone love drama nowadays jeez

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:24

Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:14

Ah yes, we've all known the type 🙈

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The “type” - the type who don’t want their child to be ill and in pain? Yeah they’re sooo fucking annoying.

Now you’ve said you worked in a school it makes sense. There’s a few school staff on this thread who give the good ones a bad name with their bossy arse control obsessions.

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:25

AubernFable · 10/02/2025 23:17

I am disabled you wally, it’s not ableist to promote following health and safety regarding medication. 😂

You know what, you should make a post about your feelings on that subject I’m sure that so many people would agree that it’s the teaching staff to blame…

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Which makes it all the more shameful that you would sneer at the needs is a disabled person.

Dont think disabled people can’t be ableist either.

And it’s clearly you’re one of those teachers who thinks your infalliable and it’s all nightmare parents not you. Thank god my kids 2 schools (BTW I have a DD in secondary that my son will be going to and I’ve had the foresight to check out now how they will support his needs) are not like you

Original poster
Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:26

AimeeBern · 10/02/2025 23:24

But concerned about what? This is what everyone keeps saying. A sip of Movocol is harmless and tastes bad, so no one will be "accidentally" having more than one sip. If you're concerned, all that needed to happen was for you to say to the teacher "hey, X mentioned their kid is having Movocol in their bottle - could you keep an extra eye on it to make sure no one drinks it by mistake" and then you get on with your life. This isn't EastEnders - why does everyone love drama nowadays jeez

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Right....but I didn't know if I would be overstepping the mark there or not, so obviously you think I'm not. Plenty of others have said to have a word with the mum. Others have said to leave it alone completely. So it's not immediately obvious what the best course of action was (if any) considering there's lots of different opinions on it.

OP posts:
Hermyknee · 10/02/2025 23:27

all that needed to happen was for you to say to the teacher "hey, X mentioned their kid is having Movocol in their bottle - could you keep an extra eye on it to make sure no one drinks it by mistake

Because teaching 30 children isn’t stressful enough - how many eyes do you want a teacher to have because parents don’t follow the rules?

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:28

Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:19

Well my child and her child aren't the only kids in the class and I'm fairly sure not all of them are on Movicol. I never said I was worried about my child drinking it. But apparently it's a very alien concept to be concerned about other children.

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Yes I’m sure it’s just all the other kids you care so deeply about

AimeeBern · 10/02/2025 23:29

Hermyknee · 10/02/2025 23:21

Depends what conditions that child has and how much of the medicated fluid they drink. Sounds like you have healthy children. What would you say to my friend with a 5 year old type 1 diabetic child, recently diagnosed whose sugars are still up and down? I know in my children’s primary school there was a child with a feeding tube, a child with epilepsy and a child who has cancer and has a chemotherapy/ steroid routine. They didn’t have constant supervision.
Be a grown up yourself and start thinking of others less fortunate. The teacher isn’t going to be keeping an eye on the bottle. It isn’t their job.

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None of those conditions are going to be flared up by one sip of Movocol. Again, I told OP to mention to the teacher but to also stop creating drama where there is none. You should consider doing the same.

Original poster
Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:29

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:24

The “type” - the type who don’t want their child to be ill and in pain? Yeah they’re sooo fucking annoying.

Now you’ve said you worked in a school it makes sense. There’s a few school staff on this thread who give the good ones a bad name with their bossy arse control obsessions.

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No, the type who thinks they can speak to teachers like shit and dictate exactly what they do without any wiggle room.

OP posts:
Original poster
Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:30

AimeeBern · 10/02/2025 23:29

None of those conditions are going to be flared up by one sip of Movocol. Again, I told OP to mention to the teacher but to also stop creating drama where there is none. You should consider doing the same.

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I have created exactly zero amount of drama, unless you count a thread on Mumsnet as drama.

OP posts:
JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:31

Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:22

I think she was reacting to your attitude of not giving a single fuck about anyone else's child. And the fact you'd be "telling" school what they will do rather than working with them to come up with a plan that takes in to account they're in a school setting

Edited
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No she was reacting to me saying I expect, not request, that my disabled son isn’t discriminating aged against. I don’t need to work with them to come up with a plan. The doctors give the plan, the school need to follow it unless they want to find the leaves knee deep in a discrimination case.

And why should I give a “single fuck” about something I have no control over? Do you send in vegan gluten free dairy free food with your child? I hope so - otherwise you clearly don’t give a single fuck about the other kids who may have those requirements

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:32

AubernFable · 10/02/2025 23:23

Absolutely right OP, thank you.

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Really?? How come it was in response to me saying schools should follow medical plans then. Backtracking are we?i

And again - why should I “give a fuck” about anyone else’s kid regarding my son’s condition?

Original poster
Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:32

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:31

No she was reacting to me saying I expect, not request, that my disabled son isn’t discriminating aged against. I don’t need to work with them to come up with a plan. The doctors give the plan, the school need to follow it unless they want to find the leaves knee deep in a discrimination case.

And why should I give a “single fuck” about something I have no control over? Do you send in vegan gluten free dairy free food with your child? I hope so - otherwise you clearly don’t give a single fuck about the other kids who may have those requirements

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No, she wasn't.

My child has school dinners so I don't send her with any food.

OP posts:
AubernFable · 10/02/2025 23:33

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:23

Nothing you’ve said is particularly nice. You’ve been VERY proud of the fact you laugh at needs for disabled children and call those who want their children to not be in pain a “nightmare”

And I would continue to advocate for the school to fulfil their duty to follow his medical plan.

I do care about other peoples children because I care about other people generally, that really shouldn’t be hard to fathom

You care so much you laugh at their medical plans? Sure

This isn’t just a reach, it’s a leap. Where did you get “laughing at the needs of disabled children” from? I was a disabled child and work with disabled children every day. I don’t want any child to be in pain—not yours or any child in his class who accidentally gulped it and then had a horrible reaction.

These precautions are to protect children with medical conditions, to make sure they get their own medicine and no other child is affected.

You are further proving my assumption that you would be awful to deal with, making up and twisting what I said. You have been nothing but unpleasant to OP, who was concerned about the class- why should I go out of my way to be lovely?

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:34

Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:26

Right....but I didn't know if I would be overstepping the mark there or not, so obviously you think I'm not. Plenty of others have said to have a word with the mum. Others have said to leave it alone completely. So it's not immediately obvious what the best course of action was (if any) considering there's lots of different opinions on it.

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Bloody hell OP if it really does keep you awake worrying about other peoples kids drinking from other water bottles put your big girl pants on and tell your mate. You don’t need to consult every man and his dog

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:36

Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:29

No, the type who thinks they can speak to teachers like shit and dictate exactly what they do without any wiggle room.

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Shiny “Here is my son’s medical plan as written by his doctor” and expecting them to follow it is speaking to them like shit Confused you’re making things up again Arnold.

And no there is no wriggle room with my son’s medication. Why should he have to wiggle?

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:36

Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:32

No, she wasn't.

My child has school dinners so I don't send her with any food.

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You don’t send a snack with her? Or a packed lunch on a school trip?

and you’re wrong about what @AubernFable was replying to

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:38

AubernFable · 10/02/2025 22:36

Be aware that if he changes schools or moves up and still requires the medication, this will likely no longer be the case, and you will need to rethink.

In no school I have worked in has this been acceptable—you would have received a polite chuckle and an “absolutely not” in response to telling them. His medicated water would be kept in a locked cabinet, as per the rules. It’s a health and safety issue at the end of the day, and you have no idea how a child will react to the wrong medication- hence, it’s taken very seriously.

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See - stop telling porkies everyone.

BTW @AubernFable a “polite laugh” is actually a “passive aggressive laugh” and I hope as a teacher and a disabled person you know that it’s entirely inappropriate to have ANY kind of laugh regarding a disabled child’s medication

Original poster
Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:38

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:34

Bloody hell OP if it really does keep you awake worrying about other peoples kids drinking from other water bottles put your big girl pants on and tell your mate. You don’t need to consult every man and his dog

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It really didn't keep me awake, it just popped in to my head and I thought I'd make a thread about it, isn't that what this forum is for? My kid is off school anyway because she's poorly so I haven't spoken to the mum at all since last week.

OP posts:
Original poster
Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:40

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:36

You don’t send a snack with her? Or a packed lunch on a school trip?

and you’re wrong about what @AubernFable was replying to

Edited
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She hasn't been on any trips yet and no the school provide a snack. We just send a water bottle

OP posts:
JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:40

AubernFable · 10/02/2025 23:33

This isn’t just a reach, it’s a leap. Where did you get “laughing at the needs of disabled children” from? I was a disabled child and work with disabled children every day. I don’t want any child to be in pain—not yours or any child in his class who accidentally gulped it and then had a horrible reaction.

These precautions are to protect children with medical conditions, to make sure they get their own medicine and no other child is affected.

You are further proving my assumption that you would be awful to deal with, making up and twisting what I said. You have been nothing but unpleasant to OP, who was concerned about the class- why should I go out of my way to be lovely?

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You said me expecting a child’s medical plan to be followed would warrant a laugh. Thats not very really is it?

You have been nothing but unpleasant to OP, who was concerned about the class

Yeah sure she was

why should I go out of my way to be lovely?

You don’t have to be lovely but don’t be PA and snide and then be horrified when people call you out on it and claim you only care about the kids (a minimum I expect really as a teacher - whereas me, not a teacher, doesn’t have to give a crap)

Original poster
Dramatic · 10/02/2025 23:41

JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 23:36

You don’t send a snack with her? Or a packed lunch on a school trip?

and you’re wrong about what @AubernFable was replying to

Edited
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Look, if you're going to come on to a thread and post overly aggressive comments then you are going to get people reacting to it. But I suspect you already know that.

OP posts:
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