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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What do you need more of in your life?

85 replies

FashionCrazy · 07/02/2025 20:18

For me it's people.
Other than partner and kids , I have 2 family members, Mum and sister, and we live so far apart we rarely speak or meet up. We have nothing in common.
I have 3 friends I see every month or so.
I'm envious of people that come from big loving families.
I can go for days without speaking to anyone outside of my household. I used to be quite a sociable person. Now I have no confidence.
Loneliness sucks.

OP posts:
Dappy777 · 07/02/2025 22:09

Space and silence and nature.

Sadly my local woods have been hacked down and replaced with a housing estate, and now the fields in the centre of the village are going to have 200 disgusting rabbit hutch ‘houses’ jammed on top of one another. Everywhere I go the countryside is being spoiled by houses and flats. The traffic is awful, and at night I’m often woken by the screeching of boy racer cars and their noisy exhausts. I just wish there weren’t so many people.

Patterncarmen · 07/02/2025 22:09

LillyPJ · 07/02/2025 21:21

If you like the outdoors and are reasonably fit, I recommend joining Ramblers and going walking. It's a great way to meet people without too much pressure to chat if you don't want to, and being active and outdoors is really good for your mind and body.

Show quote history

Excellent advice.

XenoBitch · 07/02/2025 22:14

Money
Family that care.
More years of life for my dog. They never live long enough.

Winterscoming77 · 07/02/2025 22:17

Thepeopleversuswork · 07/02/2025 21:29

A minute of the day without people asking me to do things for them.

There isn't a minute in my waking day when someone doesn't want something from me of one sort or another. Money, time, attention.

My daughter (she's a teen so it goes with the territory)
My bosses and direct reports and the endless admin of work, much of which is pointless
The bank: endless forms to fill in relating to my remortgage
HMRC
People trying to sell me things (TV channels, a holiday, a pension, a garden makeover, a subscription to a newspaper)
My daughter's school: endless demands for money for trips, signatures for consent forms, requests for volunteering, GCSE and D of E related stuff
The council: obscure dictates relating to waste management
My ex: requests for me to manage meetings with our daughter and do all the admin around it
Even friends (albeit in a benign way): seeking confirmation for invitations, WhatsApp threads etc.
My partner texting me when he knows I'm working to ask what's in the fridge

On and on it goes...

I'm the kind of person who likes being busy so much of this is of my own making and I wouldn't want to be doing nothing but its just relentless at the moment. I just crave a ten minute period without someone saying: "can you just..." There's no "just" about it. It's another demand on my time.

I lay on my bed today and one of my teens came in and I said ‘do you want something from me, cos if you do I have nothing left to give’

I feel this!!!

coldscottishmum · 07/02/2025 22:19

Boundaries.
My biggest issue is I just don’t have any. People walk all over me all the time.

Netcam · 07/02/2025 22:22

An extra day at the weekend. I'm happy working 5 days, but would love 3 day weekends in between. Enough time to rest, do the inevitable chores and then a day of fun stuff. Really it would be nice if weeks were 8 days rather than 7.

Original poster
FashionCrazy · 07/02/2025 22:28

Errors · 07/02/2025 21:19

Maybe we both need to work on our self esteem 🙂

Show quote history

I used to have some. But I guess as the saying goes if you dont use it, you lose it

OP posts:
GhostInTheWashingMachine · 07/02/2025 22:39

Love
People (dreading the weekend as I probably won't speak to anyone in person except a cashier or two, with luck)
Hugs
Self-confidence

PerambulationFrustration · 07/02/2025 22:39

Money

LeaveALittleNote · 07/02/2025 22:41

Massages

BlanketLanyard · 07/02/2025 22:44

Sleep and time, or maybe just energy

Dymaxion · 07/02/2025 22:45

I need more motivation to spend my time more wisely. This single thing would enhance my life more than any other thing. And that doesn't mean time spent on work or housekeeping per se, just spending the time I have doing things that genuinely add value as opposed to the frippery of scrolling ! And yet here I am Grin

WingsofRain · 07/02/2025 22:46

Money and dogs. Definitely fewer people.

EmeraldDreams73 · 07/02/2025 22:47

Time
Money
Sleep (snoring husband does NOT help)

Everything that needs improvement relates to one of these.

FunnysInLaJardin · 07/02/2025 22:48

I am hugely fortunate. I have everything I need!

KeebabSpider · 07/02/2025 23:00

Time on my own. To be fair I've had long periods where I've not worked and had 8 hrs or so every day to myself. But its never enough. I'd be a hermit if no one bothered me. And time to think. I can loose hours just thinking, I'd like all those hours back so I could spend it all again, thinking.

RaininSummer · 07/02/2025 23:04

Fun. I seem to spend all my life at work, recovering from work or preparing for work in one way or another.

pollypocket90 · 07/02/2025 23:07

Money, sex, respect, ability to say no!

WGACA · 07/02/2025 23:15

Daylight, energy, fun

facepalmcustard · 07/02/2025 23:48

Sleep, sex, vegetables. Not in order of priority, I'd equally appreciate an increase in any of them!

Mumto42005 · 07/02/2025 23:53
  • Love
  • Company (I have zero family and no friends)
  • Money
  • Fun
Mumto42005 · 07/02/2025 23:54

@Errors Same here with me. Apart from my children, I have no one. No meaningful conversations, no fun, nothing. Life shouldn't be this lonely.

fromhellsheartistabatthee · 08/02/2025 00:37

Hope.

PassingStranger · 08/02/2025 00:41

Sunshine and money.

ToWhitToWhoo · 08/02/2025 00:43

Health. Physical co-ordination ability (or lack of disabilities). Better leaders in the world.

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