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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take DD out of school to go to the West End

77 replies

meangal · 04/02/2025 13:35

DH and I have matinee tickets to a West End show tomorrow. DH bought them and didn't buy cancellation protection (sigh).

DS2 is poorly with a chest infection. I don't want to leave him with MIL as planned tomorrow. Not a dig at MIL- but poorly DS is hard enough but she would also be collecting DD after school and would have a couple of hours to manage with them both, and I just think it's too much/I wouldn't relax and enjoy the show anyway!

DH and I are unsure if it would be really bad form to take DD7 out of school at lunch time and she could go to see the show with DH tomorrow. It's child appropriate and she would love it. I think we'll probably end up wasting the tickets if not, or selling them on for a fraction of the price.

Her attendance is great and we would never have planned to take her out of school for a show, but seeing as how the cookie has crumbled this way, WIBU to take DD out of school so she can go to the theatre and we still make use of the tickets?

OP posts:
FedUpandEatingChocolate · 04/02/2025 14:54

Do it! If she's only 7, she's not going to miss anything critical. It'll create a wonderful memory.

steff13 · 04/02/2025 14:59

BarbaricYawp · 04/02/2025 14:30

Why don't you go to the theatre with DD while your husband stays home with the poorly 2yo?

They'd still have to take her out of school to do that, wouldn't they?

HPandthelastwish · 04/02/2025 15:03

Id keep her off the whole day, do a museum in whatever her current topic is, nice lunch out then a show. 1 day off is going to make no difference to her future career aspirations. She's not sitting her GCSEs.

Moonnstars · 04/02/2025 15:05

I wouldn't personally.

Tagyoureit · 04/02/2025 15:06

Do it. I took my ds 10 (at the time) out of school for a whole day to see harry potter parts 1 and 2 and then we went out for dinner. He loved it, still talks about it a year later.

MyFlightWasAwfulThanksForAsking · 04/02/2025 15:33

hydriotaphia · 04/02/2025 14:29

I wouldn't, no. Have you called the theatre and seen if they can re-sell the tickets or if they are willing to do an exchange? Often they will not offer a refund but will give it if they do manage to sell the tickets. Or just leave your son with MIL if she is happy with this.

Missing school does have academic consequences and imho it sends the wrong message to a child to say it's ok to skip.

What are the academic consequences of a seven year old missing one afternoon of school?

Loveumagenta · 04/02/2025 15:40

Do it! I did for DD to see a
show - told her she was going to the dentist and collecting her a lunch time. She was over the moon when she realised and we had a fab day.
Could not afford to go otherwise…

Hotandbothered222 · 04/02/2025 16:01

something similar happened to me when I was around 8 (although it didn’t involve me missing school as it was an evening show) when my nana broke her arm so my mum took me to the theatre instead. I felt so grown up! Definitely do it, it’ll be a lovely memory for her.

SparkyBlue · 04/02/2025 16:02

Absolutely I would. I've taken mine out early from school for football matches

mistymorning12 · 04/02/2025 16:07

Completely depends on what the show is!

itsgettingweird · 04/02/2025 16:09

Seeing a west end show is an experience.

Many schools do this as a school trip for that exact reason.

Arts and culture isn't nearly studied enough in the current curriculum.

Hope they have an amazing time and ds feels better soon.

Oddsocksanduglyshoes · 04/02/2025 16:11

hydriotaphia · 04/02/2025 14:29

I wouldn't, no. Have you called the theatre and seen if they can re-sell the tickets or if they are willing to do an exchange? Often they will not offer a refund but will give it if they do manage to sell the tickets. Or just leave your son with MIL if she is happy with this.

Missing school does have academic consequences and imho it sends the wrong message to a child to say it's ok to skip.

🤣🤣🤣 an afternoon off school has academic consequences get a grip… honestly…

BigSilly · 04/02/2025 16:12

... And we wonder why young people nowadays have no respect

ClippyMuldoon · 04/02/2025 16:15

I took my then 9 yearold out for a day yp travel and see Taylor Swift on the Reputation tour. She is coming up on 16 and so far we have not noticed any academic consequences. Maybe they show up later in some kids? 😀

I say go for it, she will love it.

Cynic17 · 04/02/2025 16:17

FFS, children are supposed to be in school! Of course you don't take her. Do you want her to grow up thinking she can bunk off any time she likes? How's that going to go when she gets a job? It's about learning boundaries and discipline.

Neveragain35 · 04/02/2025 16:18

I think it sends the wrong message tbh. You won’t get it approved, or are you going to ask DD to lie to her teacher?

Martymcfly24 · 04/02/2025 16:25

Oh my God as a teacher and someone who would love to live near the West End do it.

Might be different where I am (Ireland) but here you'd just get a note saying I'm collecting Mary early to go to the theatre and that would be it. Kids in my class leave early/don't come all the time for trips to matches, swimming galas, a cousins confirmation etc etc. Kids go on holidays in terms time too.
I took a day off last year to bring my 10 year old to Pink with me. to An odd day off is absolutely fine.I don't understand the hysteria.

SnoopySantaPaws · 04/02/2025 16:30

I think she'll enjoy it and it will be memorable for her and it's only half a day of school at seven. I don't see the issue.

However, my first instinct would have been for one of the adults to take a friend. If it was a show, I wanted to take my daughter to I would have booked for the three of us at a weekend or evening with school holidays.

Hope the little one is better soon xxx

CocoPlum · 04/02/2025 16:30

She's 7, absolutely.

I have picked up DD (high school) early a couple of times citing an appointment when it's been to give us time to get to a one off theatre event.

HPandthelastwish · 04/02/2025 16:31

Neveragain35 · 04/02/2025 16:18

I think it sends the wrong message tbh. You won’t get it approved, or are you going to ask DD to lie to her teacher?

You don't need to get it approved, it's not a holiday
You just say "DD won't be at school today as we are having a day trip to London to see a show and go to some museums". It'll be unauthorised but that's fine so are family holidays, they just need to know where she is for safeguarding IE with parents and not at school. They won't be happy about it as it impacts their attendance figures but that's ok.

CocoPlum · 04/02/2025 16:35

Cynic17 · 04/02/2025 16:17

FFS, children are supposed to be in school! Of course you don't take her. Do you want her to grow up thinking she can bunk off any time she likes? How's that going to go when she gets a job? It's about learning boundaries and discipline.

I have taken annual leave for similar events including one of the aforementioned one offs I took DD out for.

I'm a big advocate of attendance and my DC have 98-100% attendance every year. A carefully considered one off early finish at age 7 is hardly setting her up for a lifetime of delinquency.

FoxtonFoxton · 04/02/2025 17:03

Cynic17 · 04/02/2025 16:17

FFS, children are supposed to be in school! Of course you don't take her. Do you want her to grow up thinking she can bunk off any time she likes? How's that going to go when she gets a job? It's about learning boundaries and discipline.

Yes, careful OP. That one day at the theatre aged 7 will inevitably lead to persistent school truancy, failing exams and life on the dole.

spirit20 · 04/02/2025 17:12

Don't send her to school, but don't give the school the reason, just say she's sick. Don't give them the excuse to put it down as an unauthorised absence.

Moonnstars · 04/02/2025 17:22

spirit20 · 04/02/2025 17:12

Don't send her to school, but don't give the school the reason, just say she's sick. Don't give them the excuse to put it down as an unauthorised absence.

So you want her to encourage her daughter to lie? That's a really rubbish suggestion.

When the teacher asks her how she is feeling the next day, does she then have to have been prepped with what was wrong? And what happens if she really wants to tell her friends about the theatre?

Also many schools require a specific reason not just sick, if you say sick then they might think actual vomit in which case she will have to be off two days.

sparrowflewdown · 04/02/2025 17:23

Yes, I would go.

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