To think alot of people just want to know what you're doing and what you're upto?

[GreenCrocodile]

The don't care they are just nosy ?

You just need to get better at the blunt one word answers man, people will stop bothering you quick if you stop sharing. No one I work with knows a single fucking thing about me, what I'm up to, where I'm going or who I'm shagging because when they ask prying questions I don't tell them anything. I'm probably seen as the office weirdo but that suits me just fine.

If your not interested why make a thread about it.

I think you need to get out more.

Because with passing acquaintances when you sre together for a few minutes it is weird and rude to stand in glaring silence, bizarre to get into a deep theological conversation and only so many times you can mention the weather so making conversation about what is going on in your lives is the easiest conversation starter. I very much doubt they are keen to know all the details so they can take notes and gossip about your holiday plans, they are just filling a silence in a socially acceptable way. And it's up to you what detail you respond with, if I asked someone if they had a holiday planned this year then a casual, 'might go away with the kids for a bit' is an acceptable answer, maybe add a vague destination, no-one gives a shit about your detailed itinerary or flight times.
And if you don't like them asking you questions then maybe make more effort on your end with making conversation. If you are stuck in a surly silence then there isn't much for them to work with!
Or if you are as miserable and anti social ad you sound then don't go places with people, and if you do then use the universal signal of not wanting to chat. Put earbuds in and scroll intently on your phone.

Most definitely.

So what exactly should people talk about when they are chatting with other people?
If you can't talk about someone's life ("what are you up to this weekend") it would be a very boring conversation.

What I really want to know is what you've got against spaces between words.

I don’t find this at all, to be honest. You’re either unlucky, or have chosen to be around inquisitive people.

Or is your life like some kind of soap opera where your rival lovers are always getting into fights in your front garden while you scream ‘’E ain’t worth it, Gary!’ in your dressing gown, and the neighbours are not just curtain-twitching but bringing out popcorn and deckchairs?

That’s where people poke their noses through? Or something?

On the contrary, I think most people couldn't give a witch's tit what you're up to, and if they ask it's generally just a courtesy. You sound a bit paranoid.

I agree. Also people who want to drone on about their own mundane lives with thoughts that you'll be interested. I actually find the latter even more annoying.

so what do you ask or talk about when you meet friends and family ?

It depends on where you live. London- no-one asks or cares. Small town or village - can't even fart without someone knowing about it.

you seem to view a lot of people around you in a very negative light, I think it’s rude to meet someone and not ask after their kids , parents , new job etc id never use it as gossip or negativity it’s just chit chat xx

I think it’s just small talk, OP. People wanting to show an interest in your life, which is generally considered good manners.

It might help to learn a couple of vague rote answers - ‘oh nothing much,’ ‘oh just this and that, you know how it is’ etc - if people ask what you’re up to and you feel very strongly that you don’t want anyone knowing how you are or what you’re doing.

Not only do I want to know all that I also want to know what's going on too . 🤔

I had this just this weekend. I'm going through some health issues and saw some family members. Lots of questions asked but no real care or concern, so assume it's nosiness or they want gossip fodder. I can't imagine being so shallow.

Same family member I texted a week ago saying I've been unwell but they didn't respond to that at all.

I'm trying to make 2025 the year of investing my effort into more meaningful and mutually respectful relationships.

If someone asks how I am, I take it as a pleasantry, not a morbid curiosity about my life.

If you aren't allowed to ask how someone has been, what they've been up to, how their kids are, how their holiday was / where they are going, how work is going then what on earth do you talk about?

It's up to you how much you share and deflect the question back to them but without these little social lubricants how do you view conversations developing?

I dislike the type that do it for gossip. They fire 20 questions at you, never ask you about it again, but go around telling everybody about it, so others you’ve never told start asking you questions about it instead!
I think some peoples lives are quite boring so they have no news or topics of conversation themselves, so gather info about others just so they have something to talk about to someone else. They don’t care about the person they are talking about that’s for sure.

I think it's usually just small talk and they don't actually care what you are up to.

I’m interested in people and like them. I view most interactions positively.

I love hearing if friends have visited a great bar or been to an interesting exhibition. I love hearing how their children are doing and where they got their amazing coat from.

It’s definitely not envy, or a need to compare and certainly not borne out of a wish to gossip. Generally the people I spend time with are people I actively like and whom I want to be fulfilled and happy, it’s always a positive to hear that they are

I think people ask questions for different reasons

• some are just making small talk and don't really care and won't remember
• some are genuinely interested as they care for you
• others are genuinely interested for more negative reasons like jealously or competition

It all depends on the person you're dealing with. But let's face it, we're all humans and we're all doing stuff so we all have to talk about it in one way or another

It's called having a conversation.

You're over thinking it. In most cases it’s small talk and they’re not really that invested in what you're up to. I do particularly dislike the ‘have you got a boyfriend/girlfriend yet type ‘aunt’ (always aunts) probing of younger people. I hated it back in my day too.

You don’t sound terribly friendly so I’m surprised they approach you at all.