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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU not to arrange my days off around the requirements of the window cleaner?

117 replies

FailyDail · 31/01/2025 14:29

We’ve had the same window cleaner throughout the nearly 3yrs we’ve lived in our home. We ‘inherited’ them from the previous occupants and until now there’s been no issue.

Me & my husband are hybrid workers so there’s usually one of us WFH mon-Thurs.
The window cleaners, led by ‘Nigel’ didn’t have a set pattern and would just turn up at some point once a month, someone would usually be in. They’d wash the windows, we’d pay, that’s the end of it.

The last few times maybe 3-4, bearing in mind it’s monthly, he’s come on a Friday when usually no-one is home; husband in office I’m on a day off and usually out; I go to gym straight after school drop off then whatever else I need to do out and about.
I therefore come home to a note that they’ve been. Of relevance, if no one is in Nigel &co can’t get round the back, so only do the front and therefore charge half the usual price.

Nigel does the rounds collecting cash, which we pay, in the evening. I did ask about bank transfer but he ‘doesn’t do that’.
Again no issues with this - until today.

Today (being Friday) I was walking out of the school gates on my way to the gym.
Nigel was doing the windows of a house by the school, on a trajectory to eventually get to my road.
He spotted me and called me and I trotted over.
He announced to me that I hadn’t been in the last few times they’d done our windows. This is true!
I was slightly surprised he recognised me and had seemed to have memorised my presence or otherwise during window cleaning.
I agreed with him, slightly baffled not knowing where this is going. I thought it was about the payment.
We always pay up immediately when he does his collection rounds (or at the time if we’re in).

He then asked if I’d be in this morning, I said no told him I was going into the village. He wanted to know when I’d be back. I didn’t know. After gym I had a parcel to collect, usually have a little mooch around the shops might get some groceries, basically didn’t want to be held to a time (also, why??).
I’m getting annoyed with him now.

He then says ‘Doris says you’re off on Fridays’ ‘Doris’ being my ndn. I’m not sure what he thought the relevance of this is but he said it very accusingly almost like a ‘gotcha’

I just said ‘yes I am so I’m almost never going to home on Friday’, and went to walk off.

This is where his actual reason for all this questioning is revealed:

Basically his only access to the backs of our whole row of houses on the road is through our attached side garage.
If he can’t use our access he can only clean the fronts, and only charge half for everyone on the row.
I usually unlock the garage doors from the inside, Nigel and co troop through and do the back and the use everyone’s single storey back extension roofs to travel along the whole row. Thinking about it I now realise they come back and out through our garage afterwards, close the door behind them then I pop out and lock it after them.
Without over explaining he can’t access the rear of the other houses without going through the houses themselves, ladders buckets boots and all.

So after him explaining this to me, I think I was meant to say “gosh I didn’t realise, I’ll cancel my plans and go home and wait until your arrival”. Which I didn’t. I just said we’re usually in every day but Friday but if he persists with Friday I usually won’t be in.
He then asks (again) what time I’m usually back on Friday and I just say I’m out all day now, because by this point I cba.
He’s not exactly aggressive, but clearly quite annoyed about my lack of acquiescence and inconsideration of his requirements.
He just says ‘so you’ll be out again this morning then?’ As if this is just unbelievably selfish of me.

I walked off at this point but I’ve now decided I’m just going to cancel him and see what life is like without clean windows, perhaps hire the other chap who advertises on Facebook sometimes.
And Nigel can work out how to access his other customer’s windows without my help on Friday or any other week day.
Only issue is I don’t have Nigel’s number so will have to have another unpleasant face to face conversation.

YABU - you should just make sure you’re home on Friday morning to let Nigel in.

YANBU - continue to use your days off as you see fit and also fire Nigel.

OP posts:
allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 31/01/2025 16:39

@FailyDail so how do all those neighbours get things delivered to their back gardens??? take it none of them have a hot tub then????

Bramshott · 31/01/2025 16:43

There's a third way though isn't there - just continue as you are. You've told Nigel that you're less likely to be in on Fridays than other days, and that you don't want to fix your schedule around him. If he knocks and you're there, he can clean all the windows, and if you're not, he can only clean the front. What he does WRT the neighbours is between him and them. And yes, it's slightly irritating that he uses your garage to access the back of the whole street, but if you're are opening up for him to do the back of your house, it doesn't matter really does it?

JLou08 · 31/01/2025 16:46

You both could have saved time by just talking straight rather than talking round the issue.

Nigel "I need to go through your garage to get to the other houses so wondering when your at home"

You "Friday's my day off, I like to enjoy it so I'm not giving you a time I will be home. I'm usually in Monday-Thursday so that would be best for you but there's no guarantee, things might come up"

Nothing else to say. Goodbye and on with your day.

Boomer55 · 31/01/2025 16:50

Well if you don’t want all this, just cancel him and clean your own windows. 👍

btp54 · 31/01/2025 16:50

could he just txt you the evening before and ask you to leave garage unlocked, he could give you a rough time he would be there, problem solved and you could either stay in or go out as needed

DazzlingCuckoos · 31/01/2025 16:51

StressedLP1 · 31/01/2025 15:44

I’ve cleaned my windows twice in 8 years. The upstairs ones never as I can’t be bothered at all reach. I can still see out of them. HTH!

I get our windows cleaned now, but never used to and I have to admit I don't notice a massive difference in the glass before or after they're washed.

The biggest difference is in the frames though. I very much notice the clean white upvc sills and frames and a lovely clean front door.

Bearbookagainandagain · 31/01/2025 16:54

No way I'd put up with that.
Our window cleaner text us the day before to tell us he'll be coming, and we leave the side gate open if we're not WFH so he can access the back.
If we didn't leave the gate open, he would do only the front and we would still be charged full price, but that's the T&C's we signed up for.

museumum · 31/01/2025 16:54

There’s a misunderstanding by Doris and Nigel based on the old ways of working before hybrid. Ten years ago “working” meant out of the house and “day off” meant more likely to be in.
It’s an understandable confusion and might be age related if Doris and Nigel are older.
You need to tell Doris and Nigel clear
y that there’s very likely someone hime Monday to Thursday and very unlikely you’ll be home on a Friday without referencing days off or the like.

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 31/01/2025 16:55

@FailyDail you could always lock your garage door when he has done your and disappeared from your garden!! really put the boot in!! lol

heldinadream · 31/01/2025 16:59

parietal · 31/01/2025 14:53

can the neighbour (doris) let nigel in through your garage to do all the houses on a Friday?

WTF? Why in the name of everything sane should OP give access to Nigel - and Doris - in her absence to make Nigel's life easier? Just why?

DaftyLass · 31/01/2025 17:06

I'd say to him next time that it clearly isn't working anymore, and that you won't require his services going forward, end of.

DoBeGoodDontBeBad · 31/01/2025 17:10

My window cleaner was always a bit tin foil hat, but I finally cancelled him when he shoved a copy of The Light through my door and told me that G5 was activating the corona virus to target certain people via the mobile network

Bye bye fuckwit - hello dusty windows

Greenstamp · 31/01/2025 17:15

Obviously YANBU but

  1. I'd be inclined to repeat that you're around Mon - Thur generally rather than going straight to cancelling him. But your call.
  2. They are equipped with ladders. Ladders. Is it really that impossible for them to access every single garden? We lost a window cleaner in similar circs for our "failure" to unlock our side gate. His replacement looked a me like I had 2 heads when I mentioned access and said don't worry at all, we'll just pop a ladder over. D'oh!
EmpressaurusKittyBella · 31/01/2025 17:22

HanSB · 31/01/2025 15:35

I assume that he does a good job of cleaning the windows as you haven't mentioned the quality of the work. I think you are being a bit difficult and have just taken the way he spoke to you badly. All you need is to say that he is welcome to come anytime Monday to Thursday as you are always out on a Friday. Then it's up to him to arrange the work, obviously they used to come on the other days so they can do it again.

But the OP said ‘I just said we’re usually in every day but Friday but if he persists with Friday I usually won’t be in.’ & Nigel seems to have ignored her.

Spirallingdownwards · 31/01/2025 17:29

TianasBayou · 31/01/2025 15:03

Why didn't you simply say, he's welcome to come Monday-Thursday?

She did say she was in those days. Nigel is being a twat.

Turbo4 · 31/01/2025 17:29

If he is that desperate for the money then he will switch days. He has 4 other week days to choose from.

If Doris wants her backs done then she can let them through her house.

AnnaQuayInTheUk · 31/01/2025 17:29

God that sounds a real pain.

Our window cleaner always texts me the day before he comes. He needs the back/side gate unlocked in order to do the back so if we are going to be our we just leave it unlocked. I then pay him by bank transfer.

Why can't one of your neighbours let him through their garage if they are all so concerned about Nigel getting access to the back?

WoolySnail · 31/01/2025 17:30

EmpressaurusKittyBella · 31/01/2025 17:22

But the OP said ‘I just said we’re usually in every day but Friday but if he persists with Friday I usually won’t be in.’ & Nigel seems to have ignored her.

Of course he's ignored her, because he's decided he's doing that row of houses on a Friday and doesn't give a toss whether that works for op or not!

Tootlebum · 31/01/2025 17:32

Why don't you negotiate a reduction on your windows or even a free clean for the use of your side entrance on a set day or with a 'phone call before hand. Everyone's a winner!

mitogoshigg · 31/01/2025 17:36

Every regular window cleaner I've had has been the same, we now just book one off cleans from the man with the extra long pressure washer

Boope · 31/01/2025 17:47

He needs to pay tax learn how to do bank transfers.
My window cleaner comes at random times, puts a slip through the door and I send the money into his account.

CliantheLang · 31/01/2025 17:48

heldinadream · 31/01/2025 16:59

WTF? Why in the name of everything sane should OP give access to Nigel - and Doris - in her absence to make Nigel's life easier? Just why?

Because MN is full of boymoms who think women are appliances who exist for their darling sons to use at will.

I'd like to remind said boymoms that it will be your daughters, not your sons, who will take care of you in your dotage. And - at least if my family is anything to go by - what goes around comes around.

Midnightlove · 31/01/2025 17:57

She obviously doesn't want to have to arrange a specific time to be in for him. What of she wanted to go out that day as a one off but had to sit in for the arsey window cleaner?

Get rid and let the neighbours have the problem

FailyDail · 31/01/2025 17:58

I think I’ve not been clear enough that he’s previously been coming Mon-Thurs for years and that’s been fine, he’s now decided he wants to do Friday (I didn’t quiz him as to why)
it does say in the OP

“I just said we’re usually in every day but Friday but if he persists with Friday I usually won’t be in”

He simply has changed to Friday and wants me to be in to allow access through my garage.

I haven’t reported our conversation word for word, but I did say very clearly we’re in Mon-Thurs just not Friday.
He was then exasperated and cross that I wouldn’t commit to returning home at a certain time on Fridays so he could get through the garage. If not doing so makes me obstructive so be it.

as to why he can’t go through the other houses in the row, I suppose he’ll probably have to, I’ve no idea if he’s asked those residents or not and if they’ve not allowed it, and tbh it’s not something I’ll be getting involved in.
basically the rest of the houses don’t have gaps between them, we’re on the end with a garage, but that’s attached to another house side on to us, no other passageway to back. The side on to us house, I’ve never seen them have their windows done so don’t expect they’d fancy being the ‘access person’.

I definitely shan’t be giving Doris a key to the garage. I don’t want people going through in my absence. I’d actually have to give her the key to the house because the garage door needs unbolting from the inside so she have to enter via the internal connecting door, which she’d also have to remember to lock or else everyone has free access to the house from the garage.

OP posts:
WoolySnail · 31/01/2025 17:58

I bet he'll tell all the neighbours it's her fault they are going to have to be the ones inconvenienced instead of op too!