Year 6 (11 year olds) torturing worms

[mollyminniemo]

I know this may look like a rather bizarre thread but I need some other thoughts/ advice. My DS (11) who is a vegetarian and animal lover told me 4 of his friends yesterday stomped on a worm and killed it on purpose. DS was trying to save it on a sports field and they crowded round him to stop him getting a little stick to take it away and into soil away from all the kids. They kept preventing him from doing it and then crowded round and began stomping on the poor worm. Every time DS tried to get back in they’d (I don’t think with much force) use their hockey sticks to bat him away. They all took part in gleefully stamping on the poor worm “untill it was just mush”.
I’m horrified. What would you do?
I can speak to the boys myself as I come into the school at lunchtimes in the week. Or
message the parents? Ask the headmaster to discuss it in an assembly or with them individually?

That's a very different problem and something I would approach the school about. Not killing of a worm.

I would mention it to the teacher. It’s most likely the kids pushing boundaries and exploring their world. They should grow out of it in time. If it escalates it’s needs to be looked into.

Shocked at some of the comments here. Torturing an animal, any animal, is disgusting behaviour. It shows a lack of basic empathy and needs dealing with. I’d definitely report to the teachers. They need to have a wider lesson about being kind to animals.

I agree with this. Very worrying behaviour.

I would be really upset too, OP.

Disgusting behaviour, and really disturbing that so many people are saying it’s not a big deal. Aside from the obvious lack of empathy and emotional intelligence which could clearly lead to bullying and nasty behaviour… killing a living creature for fun is sick. And that sort of mob mentality can certainly escalate and cause larger issues.

I’d tell DS how proud I was of him, and I’d definitely mention something to the school. It’s really disturbing.

Horrible mentality from those children! Stamping on a living creature - doesn’t matter what size the creature is - its plain cruel - How can anyone feel this is acceptable?

I wouldn't worry too much . The first "stomp" would have killed it, they wouldn't have suffered.

BTW do you ever "stomp"on spiders, swat flies, kill slugs, mice and rats?

Children can be so nasty can’t they. Pretty normal though.

This happened to me at school, when I was also in Year 6 (a very long time ago now!!). I was (and still am) a vegetarian and a huge animal lover - and a certain group of boys would go around stomping on snails deliberately, just to provoke me. It was vile and truly upset me, to the point that I remember it so clearly even now! OP, your son sounds lovely and he is absolutely in the right. The other boys should be reported, but at the same time I’d advise your son to play down his views for the moment, as it’s likely the boys are only doing it to get a reaction. I learnt that the hard way - but when 10-year-old me stopped making a fuss about the snails, the boys got bored and moved onto something else. They were only doing it for a laugh and a reaction, not because they were truly murderous little boys (not that that excuses their disgusting behaviour). Well done to your son for being such a kind young man, and well done to you for taking his (valid) concerns so seriously.

A friend's parent dealt with it this way.

Friend stepped on a little ladybird. Just for fun. She was 10 or 11 and had a tendency to be moody and a bit of a bully with it.

Later that day Her father berated her for her cruelty and stomped on her bare foot. She said "ow" and he said "well that's what you did to the ladybird." She learned her lesson and isn't cruel to animals now. Her father nipped it in the bud. She has grown up to be a kind soul. She also is quite well liked in our group of friends, whereas in childhood she was not popular (for obvious reasons!)

It's how the likes of Jeffrey Dahmer started....😞

Exactly . It starts somewhere and often it’s with creatures such as worms or insects . It’s a sign of a problem often just stupidity and / or cruelty that can be dealt with but rarely can be a sign of conduct disorder. My friends son has this and started with insects , then moved on to 2 family pets-the first was thought to be an accident for years till there was a second tragic loss and they realised In hindsight the first pet dying wasn’t an accident

Exactly . It's why it needs to be nipped in the bud as soon as possible. Whilst most kids won't have the brain issues or adverse childhood experiences needed to turn them into actual sociopaths, they could turn into bullies if not shown a way to be better.

They're not torturing the worm. They're bullying OP's son.

Y6 this is the least of your problems

Even worse . But the two can be linked as my post above demonstrated . The child in that case was also a bully as well as nasty to insects. Also year 6. fortunately she had loving parents who recognised she needed discipline to change and she's fine now.

@ImWithGuineaPigsOnThisOne the two are linked only as far as the worm is used to get to OP's son, which is rather unfortunate for the worm. Bullies will always find the soft spot, which they have done.

When we used to go fishing, I couldn't bear threading earthworms and maggots on the hooks (poor worms, always the short straw!), so my brother and his friends did it with particularly squelchy gusto in hopes that I'll abandon the idea of tagging along with them.

And then kids throw worms at squealing girls...
There's worm things that are as old as age (at least mine) and then there's bully things, which is a lot more serious.

But sometimes kids who stamp on small creatures are bullied anyway regardless of context. Evil starts off small.a kid who stamps on worms or bugs even without being a bully needs firm discipline. A stomp on their toes might set them in the right direction. See how they like it.

Yeah, I've found a lot of the comments here really surprising!

We're the sort of family who move snails from the path in the rain to keep them from being squished. I'd be really upset if either of my children thought it was ok to kill a creature, no matter how small.

When we were young we used to collect bees and wasps in a jar and fill half wirh water so they could swim, next day they'd all have drowned, my brother used to pull wings off flies and see if they could fly😔can't remember what age we all were but under 13. My brothers a doctor now and I reminded of this, he was horrified, said it never happened but it did. My point I suppose is that children can be cruel, I'd be horrified if my daughter did this in fairness but I don't think you'll get anywhere saying it to the school, would you not ask your son to mention it to the teacher to tell them all they shouldn't be doing this.

They aren't toddlers. They are year 6. A child that does this needs consequences and discipline. I would ground a kid of mine who behaved like that at the very least.

A worm grows into a kitten, I never knew that 😊 ok bad joke

This is true. Sadists who go on to abuse children often start by abusing animals.

That's physical abuse of a child, nothing to be held up as an example.