To expect my son to wash his hands when he gets in?

[Whyareyousoannoying]

Ds 16yo has been at work or college, come home on public transport.

Aibu to expect him to wash his hands upon arriving home before he starts touching everything especially the fridge, food, cups etc. he will walk straight in and start going in the fridge making a drink not washing his hands.

When I ask him he shouts at me and calls me a germ phobe.

Everyone else in the house manages to wash their hands when they get in.

Why?

Exactly - just because someone might have a cast iron stomach doesn't mean that the people they pass their germs on to has one too - they could be passing germs on to someone who has health issues

Yanbu.

I agree this shouldn't be the hill to die on. FOR HIM. He knows it's important to you, it's your house, it's easy to do, and on balance (and I appreciate the impact may be minimal) I don't see how it can be argued that it isn't a factually good thing or doing any harm. If you were asking him to wash and anti bac his whole body, that would be different.

We can all tell anecdotal stories about our handwashing (or not) and our amazing immune systems.

Maybe I am biased because I have worked with nurses in the past (I'm not one) and hand hygiene is seen as important with evidence of it's effectiveness (although appreciate this in settings with vulnerable people). I just see hand washing in general as good sense, and a world away from constant anti bac use etc.

I'm not sure why you've posted on AIBU.

You obviously don't believe you are being unreasonable. You obviously think you are right and as its your home you can request he follows theae rules but you are giving short thrift/rudely replying to the comments from people who dont agree as in 'you are all in the wrong', 'dirty', 'ignorant as to how germs spread' etc.

We don't wash as we come in unless obviously dirty, we don't take our shoes off at the door and we've all remained pretty damned healthy.

Yes that could be down to chance - who knows?? In the same way we won't ever know if your good health is down to hand cleaning or chance??

Exposure to normal everyday germs is crucial in building up a strong immune system so that when you are exposed to nastier germs you are able to fight them off.

Its not necessary to wash your hands just because you've been outside your home.

My family never do this and we are almost never sick. The people I know who do this seem to get sick more! Maybe that's why they are more anxious, they naturally have a poorer immune system.

I always wash my hands when I arrive home, if I have been on public transport or in shops where I will have been touching holdrails, trolleys, etc that will definitely be covered in germs. I always carry hand sanitiser when I’m out and about too and if I’m eating in a cafe or restaurant I will always sanitise my hands. Just normal good hygiene practice.

What disgusts me a lot more is that several pet owners I know will happily touch or stroke an animal/put pet food in a pet bowl, etc whilst preparing a meal in the kitchen, without washing their hands, which turns my stomach.

In your opinion. Clearly not a universal one or this thread wouldn't exist.

People are grim. Everyone insists on daily showers whenever a thread comes up about personal hygiene but basic hand washing routine is not seen as necessary.
There are many people who don’t wash their hands after going to the toilet, scratching their balls, picking their nose and all sort of nasty habits. They touch supermarket trolleys, door handles, public transport surfaces which we all come in contact with every day. We carry their germs into our houses and somehow it’s not seen as disgusting as long as you wash your hands after going to the loo ?

This is why I really hoped that covid would change people's horrible lack of hand-washing.

Son has always washed his hands on coming into the house, because I always did. It is simple good hygeine, as much as washing after going to the toilet. This is not being germophobic, it is common sense that clean hands carry less germs.

OPs son has been at school, where infections are common. But it's good to have the routine anyway - wash your hands when you come in, wash them when you go to the loo and wash them when you change task will keep your hands a reasonable amount of clean.

I am far from being competitively hygeinic, so I wonder how many infrequent hand washers on this thread take great joy in telling people how they over-wash their clothes, bedding and towels. Yet apparently have dirty nails.

Well I was going to post but you’ve said everything that needs saying!

YANBU OP.

So joe blogs has his hands down his pants and picks his scabs... Touches the handrail on the bus. You touch the handrail. You go home. You will transfer the germs over from Joe blogs disgusting habit.

People are gross.

It really doesn't matter, and I'm inclined to agree with your son, OP. A few "germs" are good for us, after all.

We all wash our hands when we get in especially after being in public transport.

This is a rule we have in our home just like taking shoes off. Mine are little so don't often just slip their shoes off their feet, instead they use their hands so yes I do expect them to wash their hands having come inside the house. They have to be reminded and yes they may moan but we lead by example.

What I would take umbrage to is him shouting at you. He's 16 and you are still the adult in the home.

Well from your original post you sound like a germ phobe so………….

Oh right ok. Do you just eat without bothering to wash your hands then?

Depends what it is and what I’ve been doing. If I’ve just come in the house from day to day life and was grabbing a snack then no. If I’ve been walking the dog then more like.

I take hand sanitiser for when I get off public transport but I wouldn’t wash my hands when I get home unless I’m about to eat.

Well from your original post you sound like a germ phobe so………….

Do you expect people who work in cafes, bakeries, deli counters etc to wash their hands after travelling on public transport, before going near the food or crockery?

Everyone insists on daily showers whenever a thread comes up about personal hygiene

Or a recent one where people were saying they wash school uniform every day or every two days - including ties and skirts. Or another one where people were horrified at the thought of a family sharing towels.

Not at all. It's just sensible to wash your hands after you come in from being on public transport or in busy places where hundreds of people may have touched the same touch-points as you have, eg handrails, lift buttons, bus seats.

I always wash my hands when I come in.

I feel like there is a cultural element to this too - Afro Caribbean families tend to be more fastidious about hygiene in my experience.

Fantastic examples

Constantly reminding my 17 year old son, he's also heads straight for the fridge! I don't know anyone who doesn't wash their hands when they get, standard practice. They have been out all day and public transport is grimy. I also advise them to change their outside clothes before getting into bed to relax but don't insist.

There are as many airborne germs as surface based so yes, your clothes have germs on.
Not sure where you were during the pandemic but in England we were absolutely being told to change clothing on returning home. Those of us working in even medium risk professions were stripping on the doorstep, putting the clothes into a pillowcase and straight in the washing machine then immediately showering and washing hair.

Sometimes