I was unsure whether to post this here as I feared I might get some harsh comments, but I'm at the point where I'm so overwhelmed I just need to get it all in writing and out for someone to read. Please be kind in the comments - I already know I'm an idiot.
To preface, I'm a man, 23 years old. My girlfriend is 21.
I've been with her for 15 months. Things were great for the first few months -- that was, until I found out the full extent of her beliefs. For context, we're both Christian, but she comes from a much more fundamentalist branch of the Church which thinks that the Bible describes the past literally. She believes that God made the world in 7 literal days around 6,000 years ago, evolution is a lie, and homosexuality is a sin. Not only that - she's said that the man she'll eventually marry must share all these beliefs. She's sort of implicitly given me an ultimatum, that unless I adopt these ideas I can't be the one for her. She didn't make this clear until around 5 months into dating.
I've talked with her so many times about it and there's simply zero room for compromise or middle ground. I tried explaining that the 7 days could represent millions of years, etc but she has never budged - I have to believe every detail exactly as she does. She's begun to pray for God to "make me into a Godly gentleman for her" (this is in front of me while I'm sitting next to her).
Another big issue is what I believe might be controlling behavior. I'm a big film buff, and she's always saying that certain movies with sex, nudity or homosexual themes bother her. Last Summer I wanted to go to the cinema to watch the movie "Carol" (on my own). When I got into town she texted me saying, "The movie kinda bothers me" and then explained that we shouldn't watch films that portray homosexuality in a positive light so we can "keep a pure mind". She'd known for days I wanted to see this movie and gave no indication that she'd have an issue so this caught me very off-guard and I was in a bit of a tight spot. Not wanting to cause conflict, I turned round and went back home. I know, I'm stupid.
There are certain other things I've done that have bothered her, which I believe are VERY normal things that millions of people do. For example, I went to Notting Hill Carnival with two uni friends last summer. It wasn't till weeks later my girlfriend tells me it really bothered her cause "that's a place single people go to to look at girls in skimpy clothing" and "that's the kinda event we should've gone to together if we were gonna get married." She was also really bothered when I briefly met a Hollywood actress at the London Film Festival last year (I asked her a question at her Q+A event). My girlfriend said, "I always put all my energy into you so it bothered me when you used some of your energy on another woman" (??). I still have no idea what she meant. She's (apparently) OK with me having female friends but not OK with me having a 30-second conversation with a Hollywood actress who's twice my age and married with kids? I was made to feel really guilty for doing something...totally normal? Right?
I know you're probably reading this thinking, "Why are you in a relationship with this person?" and that I'm an idiot. Maybe you're right. I was just so smitten early on, it made it harder to consider breaking it off once I was "in deep" learning about the full extent of her beliefs. It doesn't help that this is the first time a girl was ever interested in me beyond friendship.
Sorry for the vent. I just really wanted to talk to someone about this relationship. I'm feeling very overwhelmed with it right now.