AIBU or Ia he rude?

[polkadotmonstera]

AIBU or Is he Rude?

Boyfriend of 3 months. Both of us late 40's. He planned a day with his friends and me so we all could meet, I was very happy about it.

We went to a coffee shop where a coworker of him was there having a coffee too ( she is female). He spent 30 min talking to her, leaving me seating with his friends who I didn't know them and they are not very talkative. Not just that, he paid this woman's breakfast and Intrpduce me to her as his friend. I felt very uncomfortable sitting with strange people ( they are nice but dont talk much) and he being so long talking to her... since then I wonder if he is interested on her and if I should break up before I have more feelings for him.

On the face of it, he’s rude. He should have spoken to the whole group and tried to include everyone in the conversation. Talking exclusively to one person to the exclusion of others is obviously rude.

Yes that was rude.

She was in another table so he stayed there with her.. leaving me and his friends in our table. This never happened to me before to be honest.

If he introduced you as his friend, act accordingly.

Yes it’s very rude but it’s leap to break up with him over it on the basis that he has feelings for her have you spoken to him about it?

An ex would do this type of thing and claim ignorance or privacy or childhood trauma or ND

he was just a lying liar who lies

and the above behaviour was the teeniest tippiest of teeny tips of his deceitful iceberg

you are only 3 months in, my advice would be to make a swift exit

there are millions of men in the world, you don’t have to put up with a crap one

It sounds as though she is more important in his life than you are.

Think I would of got up and left

I didn't want to be rude.

I see that but he was bloody rude leaving you for half hour to chat to another woman,while making you feel uncomfortable.

He introduced you to her as his friend. The rest of it is rude to both you and his friends, and that makes him a bit of a tit, but there is no good reason why he would do this after 3 months, and it's why you should bin him.

That's really disrespectful of him. I'd assume he's after her and probably dump if this is how he behaves and be glad you caught on early. What did he say when you confronted him?

That's really humiliating. It sounds like he fancies her. I would have left.

Maybe he fancies her...maybe not. Either way, I would have felt really disrespected by it.

What's he usually like?

Learn to be more forceful and represent your own interests. You definitely should have got up and said, politely, “I have somewhere else to be, nice meeting all of you” and just left.

It’s more than rude. It sounds like he has a thing for her.

I agree. I would have been embarrassed that he'd fucked off to spend time with another, clearly more interesting, woman while I sat there feeling like a knob in front of his friends.
I'd have left.

I'm sorry that you were treated like that.
If he treats you like that now, it isn't going to get any better is it?

Value yourself, don't put up with it. You deserve better than being parked up while he feeds his ego. Bin him off.

How did his friends react? Its possible you were set up for a shit test, to see if you'd have a tantrum or something. I'd throw this one back.

Just move on, OP. No relationship of a few months is worth this.

I would have left. I once had a boyfriend who let me pay for everything as I was earning more than him and then one night we bumped in to some of his ‘friends’ in a bar and he bought two of them a drink and chatted to them for ages. I dumped him. Don’t make excuses for your boyfriend’s shitty behaviour OP, you deserve more.

Yes, how did the friends react? Because min would have given me shit and so would DH's.

I introduce my SO as my friend and we've been together years. Acquaintances don't need the details of our relationship.

The other behaviour is very rude, though.

I would've got up and left and not even said goodbye to him. He is very rude.

Impolite and bad manners,surely you want to impress in the 1st few months,also poor manners to his friends too ,you should all give him the boot.