Nearly a grand on ordering food in less than two months, please help

[HelpIsOverdue]

I can’t say too much about my situation and my lifestyle as it’s really quite outing but long story short, I order food practically everyday. I have a diagnosed eating disorder but there’s a 8-12 month waiting list before even getting an assessment for the type of help that’s required so I won’t be having therapy for that anytime soon.

Today, I felt really stressed about my weight and money and decided enough is enough. I went through my transactions and saw that from January 2025 alone, I’ve spent £476.32 on Just Eat/Uber Eats/Deliveroo. I spent £598.64 in December. I’m shocked. I knew I had a bad habit but this bad? I’m always stressed and my way of de stressing isn’t picking up a cigarette but it’s going online to order food and comfort eat.

Have people really overcome an eating disorder? I know I need help and I understand if people don’t sympathise as it’s a lot of money but I really can’t live like this anymore. Any tips or advice on how to take small steps will really be appreciated, thank you

We don’t know if she’s overweight though or in what form her ED is expressed.

we don’t know if she has any health issues or other medications that may mean wld are contraindicated.

so it’s irresponsible to be recommending WLD without both the expertise and the knowledge of o/p’s medical history.

I know

i never mentioned weight loss jabs

many others did

Financially, I don't even think that's that bad. It's a little over a hundred a week? Compare that to people with a drug habit who spend over a hundred per day!

Sorry to hear about your condition, OP. If you can't wait for the NHS to help you maybe look into what we in the fitness community call "Research Chemicals" although they're not really research chemicals, they're often the same prescription medication that you'd get get from a doctor... Good examples are T3 and Ephedra and maybe Green Tea extract. Will kerb your appetite slightly and boost your metabolism at the same time.

But seriously , don't worry too much about your spending it could be a LOT worse. Are you still paying all the bills ok?

I feel your pain, it's tough. Decided at the new year to have a no-perfume buy year and so far I haven't bought any bottles in 2025.. going to try and use up the perfume I have before buying anymore even if it takes 3-4 years!

Damn, i hope you get some help sooner. Please talk to your GP

Firstly well done for acknowledging out loud you’re uncomfortable with this behaviour and you would like to change it. Secondly stop feeling guilty about the money already spent, it’s unhelpful. Just focus on making the positive change.

I think for there to be any meaningful change - and I have been where you are - nothing will change until you figure out why you keep using the app.

Is it because you find meal planning too hard? Do you not recognise you’re hungry until your ravenous and too hungry to make decisions to cook, is your kitchen too messy to cook in?

Once you can figure this out, you’ll be able to start to make changes. You may find every time you go order something putting what you would have spent in a limited access savings account seeing the accumulation of the money will motivate you. But this will only work if you figure out why you have the compulsion to order take aways.

You can do this OP,

You’ve identified that food has become a mechanism to manage stress and bring comfort. That’s great self-awareness.

Now you need to identify the sources of stress in your life; removing any that you can and identifying ways to better manage any that can’t be removed entirely. So write a list of the most to the least stressful things in your life. Think about how these things could be improved or what you might need to feel better about the stressors. That could be an extra pair of hands, or a bit of time to yourself, a change of job, etc.

It’s often not ideal to remove a coping mechanism as it allows you to cope! And you shouldn’t restrict food because it’s a non-negotiable for all of us. But you should think of alternative ways to soothe, calm and comfort yourself. Think of this as adding more tools to your tool box, so that food becomes an ineffective way to respond to stress because you have better, more appropriate options. That could be by developing strategies like ‘when I’m tired I will rest’; ‘if I’m tense I will get some fresh air and try to relax my body and mind by connecting with the outdoors’, ‘if I’m feeling lonely I will make a plan to see/speak to a friend’. Give real thought to how you would like to respond to stress ahead of time and plan to do this alternative action instead of ordering food.

The odds are on your side - most people with an ED will recover. You can do this. Momentum is built through small actions every day, and the help that is coming through your therapy will be slow, steady, consistent changes over months so why not start now with what you can.

Maybe because then she wouldn’t have £500 to fund her just eat problem?

Read some of the posts. There are literally people telling her to ‘order’ it!

Hi OP, don’t know if this will help in your situation but the eating plan for my BED is to have three meals and three snacks a day. The logic is to get back into a regular eating pattern and reduce the size and frequency of binges because your blood sugar levels will be more stable.
It does seem counter intuitive and isn’t easy to maintain but that’s what my ED consultant psychiatrist recommends.

I have binge eating problem, not to this extent, and for most of my life I convinced myself it was 'emotional eating' because that was the only thing that made sense.

After years of therapy, all unresolved trauma relating to childhood and bad marriage resolved, I was still binge eating a procrastinating, my house was a mess, with no other explanation for it, and ticking all the boxes for ADHD, I was diagnosed.

Stimulant medication really helps me. I take med beaks, because it's recommended to prevent a tolerance build up, and I notice when I do I can't stop looking for food, but I have no additional stress in my life on those weeks for me to blame it on 'emotional eating'. It is dopamine seeking behaviour.

I am in Australia, so might be different, vyvance ADHD meds can also be used for binge eating. GLP1s like mounjaro, anecdotally stop 'food noise' and all sorts of other addictive behaviours such as nail biting, excessive alcohol consumption and shopping.

Seriously consider getting meds, and/or an ADHD diagnosis if you feel you have other symptoms that fit that disorder. Fighting your biologically driven urges is so hard, and when you are unsuccessful, it then has a vicious impact on your self esteem because people tell you you are lazy and have no will power, and it's your fault. The no will power is actually kind of true, but it's not your fault. It's like telling a depressed person to just smile and cheer up. It's not going to work.

This is so helpful, I am currently waiting for an ADHD diagnosis and have noticed I feel SO much more focused and productive on mounjaro. I assumed it was a side effect of cancelling out the food noise which allowed me space of mind to be better at other stuff (like keeping on top of the washing 😄) but perhaps it is a true by product of the meds themselves. Even more reason for me to love mounjaro. Thanks for sharing.

yes, exactly!

I have a really simple daily food plan idea for you. It is easy to follow, you get to eat sausages, and honestly. you very quickly feel way better and never hungry.

Number 1: Understand that you need to take action.

Number 2: Here's the plan. Do it every day. Don't faff around with variation - just stick to this, it's good, you don't want to be introducing possible straying off the path with any decision-making. It is:

Morning, earlier than you think you want it (eg, before taking kids to school, going to work):
A small amount (like, half a small glass) of freshly squeezed orange with bits in from eg Lidl.
Two smooth pork chipolatas from Sainsburys, cooked in a mainly oil free pan till sizzling.
Two egg whites done in a little olive oil, with sea salt, ground black pepper and marjoram or oregano.
A few organic brown mushrooms and one vine tomato (thickly sliced) also done next to the egg white.

That's it. That's enough. You won't feel hungry now until about 3pm.

Prepare also a nice dish of strawberries (good ones, washed and sliced in half), raspberries and little sweet black grapes. Keep this with you all day and eat as much as you like. Whenever you feel peckish, feast on this dish.

Some time in the afternoon:
a packet of crisps of choice, if you really want it

Drinks:
fruit tea, water, one weak coffee (lots of water, little bit of hot milk)

Dinner:
A good chicken breast - free range Lidl for example, or organic, cut into much small pieces than you think, make lots of little pieces.
Heat some sesame or walnut oil (a tiny bit, in a generally oil free pan like Salter's new ones), get it hot, toss the chicken in it, thinly slice a long shallotte and add that, some sliced garlic, a few of those hard mushrooms, mangetout, thinly sliced courgette, thinly sliced organic carrot, a couple of baby sweet corns.
And a fresh sauce such as garlic/ginger/soy.

Also, do some buckwheat. 35g, pop in a little saucepan, add boiling water, simmer for 10 mins, rinse with boiling water.

Put it all in a nice dish and always use the same one.

Eat It.

Do that every day for ages and you will feel ...... amazing.

And it will cost so so much less.

Just try it. It's easy and soo nice.

Who knew that curing an eating disorder was this simple 🤣

I’ll pass it on to my psychiatrist. He could have saved years of training and research

Have people really overcome an eating disorder?

Name changed for this one. The short answer to your question is - yes! And I do sympathise!

So I went from ordering takeaways about once a year most of my adult life to having them one or twice weekly in 2018/19 to having them ALL the time in 2020-2022.

I’d sometimes order 2-3 times a day and it got to the stage where delivery men were recognising me because they’d attended my house a few hours earlier or the day before!

And looking back on it now yeah I see it was BED (binge eating disorder). I lived alone for most of the pandemic so most of this eating was done ‘secretly’ and I didn’t let on to anyone just how bad it was.

I don’t know how much I spent in total as I split it over a few accounts, but one bank account statement showed I’d spent £1200 on deliveroo alone in just over a year. But that’s not even counting what I spent on Uber eats! I was also buying lots of cakes, ice cream and pastries etc with my weekly supermarket shop! I remember one supermarket delivery man asked if I was having a party 😳😂 and I just laughed it off but didn’t want to admit that nah it was just for me!

My BMI went up from 27 in March 2020 to around 33 by June 2021. The pandemic had a lot to do with it, I wasn’t socialising at all even after the restrictions were relaxed and I just felt anxious and wanted to stay in alone all the time. Stopped going to the gym also due to covid anxiety and rarely went to hairdressers etc. So takeaways were my (very unhealthy) thing to help me relax, entertain me and make me feel good.

I was living in south London at the time and I was spoilt for choice. So many diverse and delicious cuisines on offer. This may sound ridiculous and I’m not saying you should move lol but leaving London a couple of years ago to a small market town up north really helped. It’s slim pickings with decent takeaways round here, so it’s less temptation but even then because old habits die hard when I first moved I was doing takeaways 2-3 times a week. Although it was still an improvement on how frequent I ordered them in London. Gradually it went to once a week to then once every fortnight and once a month.

I think being determined to lose weight, and also save money for travel were two big motivators in gradually being able to limit my takeaways. Now I have about one takeaway at home every 3 months.

I spent a lot of time feeling gutted I spent so much on Deliveroo etc and still can’t bring myself to add up exactly how much I spent in the past 😂 I feel like I frittered away some extra money I had when I could’ve saved it for post pandemic travel or put it towards stuff like driving lessons/car or a house deposit. But yeah I just had to get over it and look towards the future and resolve to do better.

I’m now almost back at a healthy BMI and I do enjoy cooking again - so that helps! Also I buy a few takeaway type items like frozen pizza and chips. So if I feel like a pizza and fries some days, I can at least take it out the freezer for cheaper. May not be the healthiest but it’s better than the alternative of ordering out.

Overall I do cook a lot of my own food, having an air fryer has helped with that too, makes making food - even on my lazy days so quick and convenient. I’ll just throw salmon and frozen veg in for example. Or shake some spices over chicken and throw rice in the air fryer.

Aside from moving and getting an air fryer lol other things that helped was journaling, deep breathing exercises and talking to a friend on the phone or doing something I found interesting that didn’t involve watching tv as that often led to me mindlessly eating - also sleeping better massively helped.

Sometimes when we are tired or bored we think we are hungry when actually we need to get some rest or nourish our brain. Apparently being sleep deprived means we’re more likely have sugar and fatty food cravings which explains why I was sleeping 4 hours a night and ordering takeaways for breakfast and dinner!

I do still binge now and again but it involves way less food and happens far less frequently now. So yeah I’d say my BED is more or less under control now.

Two egg whites done in a little olive oil, with sea salt, ground black

Nothing wrong with an egg yolk

It's okay.

Now you have faced the dreadful adding up your purchases, you'll change and be more conscious.

That was very brave, most people with addiction or a bad habit wouldn't dream of adding up the monthly tab.

It's done, now meal plan, go shopping 3 nights per week for fresh food, easy but tasty recipes.

You're not alone with these apps. I order more than I should at times because it is convenient.

Those who are saying if you have 500 to spend, spend it on counselling, don't understand how addiction/bad habits work.

All addicts could afford therapy if they'd use the money they spend on the addiction, however in real life...

Also to add to my pp - dancing and walking lots helped! I think it had the effect of reducing my stress and cortisol levels so I felt better and ate less.

I also had a couple of friends who were draining. One in particular who used me as her emotional dumping ground until last year when I made clear to her that I wasn’t her 24/7 therapist and she’s kind of faded away. I’d definitely feel like ordering takeaways after any interactions with her.

She was triggering my own childhood trauma that I’m still dealing with and it was just too much. The overeating was definitely partly a trauma response to the past and present . I don’t drink, I don’t smoke , I don’t take drugs so I guess this was my way of escapism.

at Christmas I caught up with someone I’d not seen for years recently, and as my weight loss is pretty visible, they asked me in a roundabout way if I’d taken weight loss meds and I told her nope!

I’m glad I started my journey to overcome BED before I even knew about the current wave of weight loss drugs, because I think I’d have been tempted to get on them.
And while it would’ve been cheaper than what my daily takeaways were costing me (I think I was spending about £50-£100 a week across 3 food delivery providers) it’s still money I’d prefer not to spend.

And beyond financial reasons, for various reasons. I don’t want to depend on daily medication if I don’t have to. I was watching an Australian talk show recently and some people were talking about a period when Mounjaro etc were in short supply for whatever reason , how stressed they got when it wasn’t available.

That’s a personal choice though and I know others have their own opinions and experiences but for me it feels so liberating to have done this without meds.

If you can afford a therapist though I’d look into that even if you just do it over a period of a few months. Tbh it didn’t help for me but I’m glad I tried it out for a few sessions . Maybe I’ll find a therapist I click with in the future though.

Eating the same 3 meals every day is boring

Op might not even like sausages

I did too.

Those of you recommending overeaters anonymous please can you share details.
A Google search doesn't give me much local in the UK.

Thanks.

Overeaters anon is the same method as NA and AA..
I think the community in OA like the others really helps, having a sponsor a wise ear to listen to you for the good times and the bad.