AIBU to try and prevent care home fees? Advice appreciated

[Watermelonsuns]

So my parents are elderly, both have health issues but managing well at home. My mum in particular would struggle if something happened to my dad. Recently a friend's parent had to go into a care home and as the parent owned their own house and savings they are self funding and the fees are crazy.
AIBU to try and find a way to protect my parent's property and savings in order its not all gone in care home fees in the last years?
Someone has suggested moving their property into my name but surely that would be an obvious way to avoid fees and would look dodgy? Is there another loop hole im missing? Aby advice from someone working in this area would be appreciated thanks

Bravo

AIBU to try and find a way to protect my parent's property and savings in order its not all gone in care home fees in the last years?

Someone has suggested moving their property into my name but surely that would be an obvious way to avoid fees and would look dodgy? Is there another loop hole im missing? Aby advice from someone working in this area would be appreciated thanks

Yes, YABU. Very unreasonable.

You are setting out to cheat taxpayers so you can hang onto your parent's house as your "inheritance." Why should I & millions of others pay for this?

If your parents have to move house, then they sell their current home to afford to live where they need to live. What you are proposing is akin to me moving for work, but requiring that the taxpayer fund my new house, so I can keep my old house.

So that's the immorality of what you're suggesting.

The legalities are that local councils scrutinise financial arrangements that appear to aimed at deliberately depriving the person/s in need of their assets, so that they don't have to pay for their care.

And the care that is available to be paid for from the public purse is generally of a lower standard, and importantly, there's very little choice.

Is that what you want for your parents, in order to preserve your inheritance? Nice.

Well you could make plans for you to undertake all of their care yourself, thus avoiding any need for care home fees.

Otherwise who do you actually expect to pick up the cost of the fees?

It’s called Deprivation of Assets and it’s illegal.

Deprivation of assets is an offender or similar. It will be found. Care home fees are dreadful but:
if you work in the premiss you aren’t entitled to a massive inheritance, you’ll be happier in the long term. My life changing inheritance went in 8 years and still going, care home fees.

Work out what it would cost to have a carer for a parent 24/7. Per hour £12 something. Work out that cost per month plus heating and meals and other bits and pieces. Obviously care homes have economies of scale but even so. Can you keep your parent clean and fed? Bath lifts, etc?

I know it’s awful and I know I sound hard hearted but I found the mantra ‘safe/warm/fed’ helpful. Mum’s 94 in March.

I think most are privately owned round here and council funders live side by side with people paying thousands per month. A family member who is paying thousands for care for their mother knows of at least two in there who have never worked a day in their lives and always been on benefits. They are getting exactly the same care. It’s this unfairness that prompts people to want to avoid care fees and it’s not necessarily the ones due to inherit. I have resigned myself to the fact I might not inherit from my elderly parents but my dad in particular is angry that the house that they scrimped and saved for on poor wages will not go to his kids if they need care. If it was a two tier system around here and paying got a much better standard I’m sure it would anger him less

If you move from one house to another it is normal to sell the first one to pay for the second. You may move to a more expensive house so will need to add money.

If you move from an owner-occupied house to a rental it is normal to sell the first house to pay rent on the second from the proceeds. If you move to a more expensive house you will use up more of the proceeds of the sale.

If you move to a Care Home, that will be your new home. It may cost more than staying put, but if it's the way to meet your accommodation needs you will have to pay for it.

Why should they keep a home that is no longer suitable and have the taxpayer pay for their appropriate accommodation?

Their accommodation needs should take priority over your inheritance. It's the money they worked for and saved for so should benefit them.

Your parents might never need to go into residential care. I believe most people don't. But if your parents do get to the stage where they need to be in a care home and they won't be coming back to live in their house, there is no logical reason why the house should not be sold to pay the care home fees.

What you actually mean is “my parents own a house and I stead of them using their house to find their care at the end of their life, I want that house, that I’ve paid nothing towards, to come to me. I don’t care if my parents final years are spent on a shitty council funded care home as long as I get the house”

One thing that’s hardly ever mentioned re care home fees, is that self funding means you have the ‘luxury’ of being able to choose the time and place.
If you’re reliant on social services, who are always hard pressed, for both time and finances, it’s not uncommon for them to wait until family doing their best to care are absolutely on their knees with stress and exhaustion, particularly when dementia is involved.

We’ve had two self funders in this family - my DM and my FiL (both dementia) and I must say I was very glad that we didn’t have to depend on the tender mercies of social services.

I've had to research into Deprivation of Assets.
How much you have to pay depends on your savings, pensions and assets.
If it looks like a person has deliberately moved their assets to avoid paying care fees, the calculations will still include the assets.
Nothing to be gained at this late stage.

I don't consider OP to be 'grabby'; Good luck OP.

This!

Why don’t people think that people should pay for their care home fees with their own money- just like everything else in life!

Disagree. I know people who have received excellent later life care through SS/local authority(and quite rightly so)

Pretty much! It’s amazing how many people think this way.

The sneaky way round this is to... Move your parents into your home when they need care and then provide the care for them until they pass away. That is the only way to avoid care home fees, or they could stay in their home and have help come in

YANBU OP, I get you

A) Deprivation of assets.

B) It is your parents' money so it is their decision how it gets spent, not yours
C) Do you really want your parents to have substandard local authority care?

My mother had quite a lot of money (an inheritance) and it has all gone on care home fees. I have LPA for her and I was very happy to be able to use that money to buy the care she has needed over the past ten years.

You could smother them in their sleep, so they don't need a care home?

I guess you caring for them in their home instead of a care home isn't an option you'd consider.

You obviously don't care about your parents very much if you are only thinking about saving money. but framing it as if you are concerned for them.
Here's hoping they spend every last penny on a nice care home, even if only so you don't get your grubby mitts on it, and please don't bang on about grandchildren either, you can provide them with your money when the time comes.
As a mortgage free homeowner if I knew one of my kids were so greedy they were writing this. they would get a very sharp response and possibly fuck all out of my will

I moved mum closer to me and stopped work to look after her. It wasn’t about the money. I wanted to look after the person who looked after and loved me when I was a child.

What makes you think that taxpayers should pay for your parents’ care in order to protect your inheritance? It’s illegal, immoral and you should be ashamed of yourself for trying to find a way to do it.

I find this attitude infuriating. It's almost as if some people don't realise what a massive financial hole this country is in and what a significant proportion of expenditure goes on care. I'm all for supporting those who genuinely need it, but not for those with significant assets who could pay themselves. As an example, my own grandmother with significant savings and her own property has just been awarded an 'attendance allowance' which she could easily pay for herself. I'm glad she's being looked after of course, but social care should be reserved for those in genuine need, of which there are plenty!

first if your dad goes in a care home they won’t touch the house if your mum is still
living in it

This will only work on death 😂

get them to seperate the tenancy to 50 -50
and have mirror wills leaving you their half
and a life time intrest for the surving spouse

if your dad dies
you inherit his half - but you can’t touch it as your mum has a life time interest in the house

should your mum need care you the house is sold but they can only take into account your mums half ( not your dads - which is now yours )

this way you will at least inherit half of the estate ( if this is what your worried about )

It’s cheap effective won’t cost more than £500 or so and perfectly legal
my parents paid £350 back in 2017
It protects the house from say if your mum remarried ( you will still own / inherit your half) it wont go to a new husband / family

half is better than 0

my parents did this - leaving it to my son
my dad did go into a care home but only for a few weeks before he passed away so my son inherited everything in their estate house / cash

Absolutely, don’t pay for your parents care, get the rest of us to pay for it for you so you will have a nice chunky inheritance.