AIBU regarding potential buyers of our property?

[UniqueShaker]

We are selling our house and we had a lovely couple feed back to the estate agent on their first viewing that they really liked our property - albeit it took them a few days to offer this feedback. They said they would make contact with the EA after they viewed a couple more properties that they already had lined up. Fair enough.

They emailed the EA after the other viewings and said they were not considering the other properties they viewed and asked to arrange a second viewing on our property. They came back for the second viewing and again said they loved the house to me. They told me once they had an offer on theirs they would be in touch to place an offer on mine.

EA called them following their second visit on my property (which is just standard procedure for them to chase feedback). It took them 4 days to respond to the EA. They told EA they can’t give me a figure what they would like to offer but they’ll be in touch when theirs SSTC. They hinted it would be very close to asking. They informed EA they had lots of viewings going ahead on theirs and would be in touch following these. EA has tried to chase them up following the viewings they had on theirs but they are blanking the EA completely. Their property still hasn’t sold as I can see it on Rightmove still for sale.

I know they clearly haven’t sold but It worries me that they are blanking the EA and they’ve suddenly gone really quiet. Their last viewing on my house was over two weeks ago and two weeks since they spoke to the EA. EA told me not to worry as they have always been difficult to make contact with, but I just feel if they were that interested they’d respond to my EA to update us.

I’m starting to get a little frustrated because around this time I wanted to reduce my property to sell quickly but in order to try and maximise our chances of selling for the highest price we delayed reducing considering we had this couple as potential keen buyers - they have certainly been overly enthusiastic each time they visited and EA felt it was wise not to reduce until our potential buyers had the rush of viewings on their property. They said it was silly to reduce at that point in case they came with an offer the next day. I was in agreement with this too. It made sense.

I had found a house that I liked and had told our potential buyers this. We unfortunately lost that property today as somebody else has offered. Now I know it’s not our potential buyers fault, they haven’t sold yet so we can’t change the situation but I feel a little more communication and updating throughout would have been nice. It would fill me with more confidence that they are serious and genuine.

I can’t understand why they wouldn’t be making contact with my EA? Unless they are no longer interested. I updated the estate agent regularly on the property I was hoping to purchase, even if just to say things are slow moving but we’re still keen. I feel that if you love and want a property enough you have to maintain that contact. This clearly worked as the vendors I was looking to buy from ensured their EA gave me a fair chance to place an offer by close of play today and again chase our potential buyers before they accepted the other persons offer.

I think I’m just feeling a little disheartened and feel I have been strung along by this couple. It’s just so bizarre that they discussed decor and where they’ll put their belongings in the rooms when they’ve viewed my house, to just be completely silent…

I’m also wondering that if for any reason we do hear from them soon and they sell theirs, that I don’t particularly feel I want to sell to them because of how poor their communication is and I just fear they’d stress me out during a house sale.

AIBU? Am I just letting this house selling and buying malarky send me in to an overdrive? At the end of the day they did say they’d be in touch when they sell, and clearly rightmove suggests they haven’t…

Ive reduced my house now and I’m trying to no longer see them as ‘potential buyers’.

Golden rules
1.Buyers are liars
2.Instruct your EA to only contact you with buyers who prove they can proceed.
3.Do not view, window shop or look at any properties until you have exchanged contracts. Stops emotional stress!!
4.Go into rented if you have to if the right property hasn’t come up after exchange/completion of your sale. You will then be a sought after “Buyer” to the Sellers of your next dream home, therefore in a good negotiating position!

People say a lot of shit it means nothing really, even once you accept an offer it's still not a done deal. Try and be a bit more wary and take in less of the chat.

Oh my god! That is so strange!

This is all helping me realise and opening my eyes to it all properly.

I'm forcing myself to feel positive now.
I've already reduced. The feedback I have are things I can work on so I'm getting cracked on with that.

I'm also going to stop looking at properties on rightmove until I am sold STC. No use falling for somewhere that can come and go in a flash because I'm beaten at the race. That way when I am sold I can search what is actually available and realistic to me. And hopefully the longer this drags on the more properties will actually be on the market when I am proceedable.

We’ve been very unlucky with multiple collapsed chains (never on our property, but always further down). We are onto our fifth buyers now and over the last 11 months (obviously SSTC multiple times) have had 72 people view our house, generating nine offers (4 were never in a position to proceed) so I feel I can talk from experience even though we are yet to ever sell a house! I do worry if the current sale doesn’t go through it will look to RightMove browsers that there is an issue with our house!

Having been back on the market recently we had one couple who were proceedable who needed to move quickly. They viewed and said to the EA they loved it and it was perfect for them. Came back the next day for a second viewing to show a family member. Said to the EA they couldn’t wait to move in, discussing how they would use the extra reception room downstairs, saying they were going to buy the OS Map and plan their local weekend walks. Said they’d formalise the offer later that day but it would be close to asking…. The agent never heard from them again, despite leaving lots of messages.

We also had multiple viewings from people on the market themselves who said they’d offer asking price but fundamentally weren’t proceedable so it was all a waste of time.

People are weird. House selling is an exercise in frustration and patience.

These are all steps I am going to consider.

I've done this before, sold, moved out and been a desirable buyer, hence why I got my property current in the first place. He had offers over asking but accepted my offer of asking because I was the most desirable buyer.

This is my first time in a chain and I do not like it!! It's also my first time doing my own viewings which I've found to be awful in itself.

Oh wow! I am sorry it has been so stressful and so long for you. I hope things go smoothly moving forward. Thank you for sharing your experience.

It doesn't really matter because they are currently not in a position to proceed. They may not even sell there's or it may take them ages. You should just continue with your own plan and if they sell quick enough then great, if not then at least your not sat waiting around. Selling in a chain is a nightmare, you need to be a bit more selfish and do what's right for you op good luck

I remember selling my first house. Had a couple round to view, who said they loved it and offered the asking price. I was sceptical, as they told me when they looked round that he was a part time security guard and she cleaned a few hours a week. I just had to assume at the time that they had money and/or mortgage in place. The following day, whilst waiting for a call from the EA, I got very excited looking at houses online that I was going to look at.

I then get the call to say that they hadn’t even applied for a mortgage and only had a £5k deposit. They got turned down for a mortgage, so obviously couldn’t buy my house.

I told the EA that in no uncertain terms was he to send anyone else who couldn’t prove that they had a mortgage in principal.

Thing is op, if I was them I’d be asking if I wanted the hassle of buying it as I was getting hassled. If I’d been perfectly clear I’d be in touch when it was sold, and then I started getting the agent wanting updates when they knew it wasn’t sold, and the buyer thinking they should get updates on my viewings, I’d be considering binning the idea off.

I think this was very poor from your agent, and could have lost you the sale.

The estate agent calling and calling them is pointless; they don't have an offer yet and need to wait for one, so they aren't able to proceed. For all you know they might both work, have kids, have personal issues underway... and are just really busy. When we were ready to buy this house, I needed to sell my old one; I had some below sale price potential buyers but still needed a few days to sort out renegotiation. Neither the estate agent nor the sellers harassed me in those few days, and it would have been pointless because it could not change anything. Lots of people don't have time to waste during the week chatting about nothing on the phone, and I kindly suggest that the agent may have been really irritating them. Settle down, get viewings, get some exercise if you're feeling restless and only accept offers once people have funds.

They've looked, they like it, they said they will put an offer in as soon as they are proceedable. What more do you actually want from them?

In the meantime, keep doing viewings for whoever requests them and wait.

If I was them, had set out my situation and was being badgered relentlessly by the EA I'd be livid.

Very good point. Your Estate Agent is making you look desperate to sell. If a property has been on the market a while and I was chased so much despite making it clear I wasn't proceedable I'd maybe start wondering what was wrong with the property if they were still trying to tie me down to it. Or I'd think the vendor was going to be too pushy and demanding at times when the situation is out of my hands.

If you're also doing the viewings yourself then @UniqueShaker I'm guessing you're using an online agent who you've maybe paid upfront? I'm afraid you get what you pay for. 🫤

Ps. Get yourself on this forum and read, read, read. Wealth of info.

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/categories/house-buying-renting-selling

If they were that keen they would have been communicating with your EA quickly and efficiently. You can't hold off on reducing the asking price just because you have somebody who might, maybe, one day be interested in buying your's. You'll be the ones missing out if you keep this up.

Currently selling our house. Lost count of the number of enthusiastic buyers who show interest and then ghost. Had one lady viewed 3 times, then nothing. The ghosting is particularly annoying just say “thanks but not for me” rather than ignore the agent.

We currently have 3 people very interested but need to sell theirs, I won’t hold my breath. I’ve bought and sold waaaayy too many houses than I’d have liked for various reasons, it’s always been the quiet and unassuming person who offers and buys.

We weren’t going to bother viewing until we’d sold, as don’t want to be in position of finding somewhere great and not being able to buy it. We've now looked at a two last week given interest in ours. I confess we’ve been positive when viewing as they were great properties, but then sensible heads go on when you leave and you realise it’s not for you. Thankfully we’re in a rental (relocation) so able to sell without buying straight away, it feels nice to have an opportunity to not hurry to find somewhere for once.

it’s a slow market at the moment, the last few times we’ve sold and bought it’s been pretty quick to sell and lots have been coming on and being sold quickly. Not much coming on and things taking their time to sell (this is in two different parts of the country).

Just roll with it, don’t plan too far ahead and it’ll all come right in the end. Hope you sell soon and find your next home.

There's a house we have our eye on. Whether we feel we can actually afford it depends on what we get for our house. Basically, having the extra £20k deposit makes a difference to if we can afford the monthly payments. It's as simple as that.

We're not viewing it yet or telling them we plan to make an offer because we don't want to cause the kind of anxiety you're going through. But it's possible that your potential buyers are serious about the house, just got overexcited and didn't realise they'd be toying with your emotions too.

I won’t allow viewings from people who aren’t in the position to proceed, when I sold my last property I had a whole family turn up one evening for a viewing - when they left they told me they weren’t interested in actually buying the house, they had just wanted to see inside as they walked past everyday and always wondered what the house inside looked like. I had a toddler at the time so it was annoying - I’d ensured the house was in pristine condition, I’d rushed home from work too. They could have just looked at the photos on rightmove. They weren’t the first to waste my time so this time round I won’t allow it.

It’s quite normal round here for viewings to be refused unless the potential buyer is proceed-able, usually means has an offer on their house

I think you need to put the couple to the back of your mind and do whatever you need to do to get your house under offer

unfortunately and selling houses is a very stressful business

They are probably just fed up with your EA hounding them!! If they had something to say if any note (ie an offer) they would be in contact - if not they have nothing to add. EA's don't need or want to know about each and every viewing on a property they are not marketing!! Calm down in this one, keep having viewings and good luck with selling. (And don't bite your nose off to spite your face if these people come back and make an offer!!).

An unusual view on MN but I would still show to unproceedable people in some circumstances.
At the higher end of the market there are only a couple (at best) houses out there and you wouldn’t sell yours without lining up the next one. You could be in rental for years!
I saw a rare property, offered on it and was accepted on the basis mine was sold in three weeks. I had two offers in two days and the sale went ahead.

You’re not in a chain! You haven’t sold your house or had an offer accepted. Your house is for sale; that’s the stage you’re at. If you’re this stressed at this point, when nothing has happened yet and no chain has been formed, the actual chain part is going to horrendous.

This is not true in all areas. It is the norm here to view houses as soon as yours is on the market. It can be frustrating but saves a lot of time and hassle at the other end of proceedings.
I am in the same position as the couple who want your house OP- I've said that I'll offer on a certain house when I get an offer on mine. The estate agent haven't been in touch since then, there's nothing to say until I get an offer! I don't know how I'd feel if I was put under pressure tbh...

We had this exact behaviour from our buyers and stupidly ended up proceeding with them, they were a NIGHTMARE and we ended up with exchange and completion on the same day which wasn't stressful at all. The whole thing was heartbreaking for various reasons and I wish those buyers had never set foot in my house. Sack them off now the heartache and stress isn't worth selling to them.

I'd find it really annoying to be pestered by your agent. They've said they'll be in touch when they've sold. You know they haven't sold. There's zero point in them telling your agent how viewings are going and busy people have no time for pointless calls like that. They're busy selling their house as well as everything else in their lives. Your EA is wasting their and your time hounding them and updating you on nothing. Until they're proceedable it means nothing and they can change their mind at any point regardless. You and your agent need to not focus another moment on them until/unless they get in touch because their SSTC and make an offer.

I think you are getting way too invested in these potential “buyers” who actually are not in a position to proceed. They were right not to make an offer until under offer themselves because that would only have raised your hopes higher.

I think you need to focus on the bigger picture which is that you need to get an offer from someone who can actually proceed. Therefore, if it has been on the market for a while and this hasn’t happened, it’s probably time to reduce the price. You want to attract some new buyers, and in particular buyers that have already sold their own property or are cash buyers/FTBs.