Men are difficult

[mylovelyboycat]

50% of people are men. 50% are women. I've lived in this flat for 5 years and 100% of the people who have caused problems are men. I don't want to live here anymore...

1. Very quickly after moving in I became aware of a horrendous stench and my flat filled with blue bottles every time I opened the window. Turns out a man was living in self neglect and squaller.

1. Self neglect man was taken into care, so we could all use our balconies and open our windows again. so the neighbouring man enjoyed his new found freedom to spend 24/7 smoking weed, singing and rapping on his balcony. It was unbearable. Man 2 threatened me when I complained.

1. The next man decides he didn't like the cannabis smoke, from man 2, so he started burning copious amounts of incense, which I started having as allergic reaction to. I tried to discuss this nicely with man 3, but he reached the conclusion that I was actually in love with him and was angry that he had rejected me and was pretending to have an allergic reaction.

1. Man 4 turned up at my door with a kitten calendar and some organic vegetables and thought he could save me.

1. Man 5 turned up, he's a drug dealer, noticed I didn't go out much, so set up a camera to monitor my movements and followed me everywhere. Literally stalking me. I reported this to the police but they said it wasn't a police matter.

I'm trying to move out now. Is anyone aware of any flats that you can rent where men are not allowed to live? I mean this could have been a really nice home for me!

What’s your AIBU? Women can be difficult too, and your sample size is much too small to be representative.

Not sure what you AIBU is but just move. Why come on here asking? You've not even given an area, yeah i might know a flat but it could be in Anerdeen while you are in John o Groats.

Just move.

I know. But 5 years of stress. If we took the men out of the equation, all the women who live here seem to be able to do so without causing an unbearable stench, a blue bottle infestation, singing, rapping and smoking weed 24/7, developing delusional beliefs that their neighbours are in love with them, drug dealing, stalking and threatening behaviour.

Aibu to think it would be nice to live in a block of flats without men?

Um, if you use bullet points in an OP it is usual to notice when the numbers are all the same...
YABU.
Plus I think actually women are 52% of the population, but I might be wrong.

Just move! Check your privilege.

@NordicwithTeen whoops! But I think you can still understand my point. I mean, how many women stand on their balconies smoking weed and rapping?!

@NordicwithTeen yes, I am drunk so I didn't notice! These infuriating naughty men have driven me to drink.

Boys will be boys I guess

I had far more problems with women when I lived in a flat! No problem with the men, actually they were very pleasant and helpful with repairs etc. to the outside of the property (converted mansion house). YABU to assume men are always difficult based on this one experience.

I think there should be women only villages, like the over 55 complexes.

@MeAndBoqDrivesmemad thank you, you understand. I would definitely move in

Maybe it's just this particular block of flats. As well as most of them being an utter pain, I have never had so many people turn up at my door bearing gifts... everything from chocolate, perfume, kitten calendars, self help books vegetables a cat ornament 😂 always men turning up with the weird gifts! None of the women!

I have similar issues with my neighbours… trash pilled up in garden, mice coming up from there, maggot infested bins, loud music all day and night, stalking, harrassment etc. They are 3 women though so I think AH neighbours are just common occurrence unfortunately, but hopefully not to this extent unless they’re insane. I’m looking at moving to a flat that’s either above garages or above commercial properties. Even willing to move across country to a cheaper area to have a house without neighbours tbh! I wish you luck in escaping your insane neighbours too.

@S18 . That sounds difficult. Do the three women live together? The problem with the men where I live, are not just one family of men, they are all different and separate and all live in different flats and they don't even know each other. I think it may be something to do with the men that live in this specific area. I'm not allowed to say what it might be, because we are not allowed to talk about things like that.

Yes that is difficult when it’s multiple neighbours. Mine all live in the same flat (I think they are in all in a relationship with each other). My other neighbours are generally pleasant and keep to themselves. I believe that it was actually one of my other neighbours complaining about the rubbish that caused the harrassment/stalking as the insane neighbours assumed it was me that had complained due to being the direct neighbour.

Who doesn't allow you to say what?

From my own experience, I disagree. I lived in a flat while at uni and only ever had any issues with other women in the building, there are difficult people anywhere regardless of gender and the nature of when living in flats is that you have more neighbours to co-exist with, and so more chance of there being difficult ones.

Why are you living with men?

I would t feel safe for a start!

Yes, YABU.

You have had issues with 5 individuals. That doesn't make all men difficult. It makes the individuals you have had problems with difficult.
As many of us have experienced, lots of people can be difficult to live in close proximity to, even more so when you haven't chosen them and have nothing in common with them. That can be both men and women.
I've had some lovely neighbours who are men, over the years, but I wouldn't presume from that, that 'all men are lovely' - that would be a ridiculous stretch.

Any problems in my life have been mostly caused by women. That doesn’t mean women cause all problems.

Yabu.

I'm guessing she's comfortable being sexist, but doesn't want to reveal her racism.

Yep, that’s exactly how I read it as well.

People will say "not all men" and strictly speaking they're right, but I think there's a couple of things here:

• #4 doesn't even sound that bad, but when a lot of people are giving you hassle, then someone overstepping slightly is going to feel worse.
• It's scarier when men are pushy, stalking, obnoxious. The world is full of nosy busybodies who are women, but you're not generally worried about your safety around them.

The "just move" was in relation to why ask strangers on the Internet? Just do it.

But if course YABVU to think that there should be living spaces (flats) that don't allow men. Unless it's a women's refuge, men are allowed to be in a place.

Yes, absent any further information, I was thinking that No 4 didn't seem to be in the same league as the others.