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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend annoyed at me for this

56 replies

OneBrightAzureBiscuit · 17/01/2025 15:55

i have a best friend who I get on so well with, she’s like a sister to me and we have known each other years. Anyways, we were talking over the past month about seeing a certain film at the cinema. She loosely mentioned it a few times but plans never materialised. I was waiting for her to get back to me about it.

anyways, yesterday me and my partner went to see the said film and she found out that I went and watched it with him. She texted me today in an ok mood but kind of passively aggressively confronted me about it- she was like “I see you saw “said film”
I explained and said “sorry if I upset you, you didn’t make plans with me and I was invited so I went, I would of gone if you had arranged it with me”
she then said “I see you’re sorry, I was just shocked but it’s ok now”.
we have now planned to see it next Thursday but I just don’t understand. I could definitely understand her emotion if it was another woman like in the sense of replacing her but it’s my boyfriend! We been together 6 months!
I apologised a few times but my boyfriend said I need to stop defending myself

any advice/ what are your thoughts? X

OP posts:
susiedaisy1912 · 18/01/2025 06:53

MumblesParty · 17/01/2025 16:56

In your situation, I think when my boyfriend suggested seeing it, I’d have said “I’d love to, but I sort of said I’d watch it with my friend, so I’d better check with her if she still wants to see it, before I watch it with you”. I would then have contacted friend, asked if she was still up for it and booked a date.

And this

janeavrilavril · 18/01/2025 08:35

AlpacaMittens · 18/01/2025 06:46

Does she suffer from anxiety and/or depression? I can see myself in her cringey behaviour and in my case it was because of generalised anxiety disorder. Still not your fault! Just trying to find an explanation. You did nothing wrong.

unbelievable ...

AlpacaMittens · 18/01/2025 08:36

janeavrilavril · 18/01/2025 08:35

unbelievable ...

What is unbelievable?

Diblin93 · 02/09/2025 04:45

‘If’ you feel this friendship is worth the effort, go and see the film again with her. However, she sounds very controlling and high maintenance. Is she worth the trouble?

PussInBin20 · 02/09/2025 06:26

Diblin93 · 02/09/2025 04:45

‘If’ you feel this friendship is worth the effort, go and see the film again with her. However, she sounds very controlling and high maintenance. Is she worth the trouble?

You know this thread is from January?! I’m sure she’s over it now.

IamnotSethRogan · 02/09/2025 06:41

Tbh I don't think she really did anything wrong. She's not really made a big drama about it, just expressed she thought you 2 would go together having mentioned it. She's not mad at you but just thought she'd express she thought you'd see it together. Miscommunication at best but it's pretty healthy for a person to say "oh i thought this would happen"

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