Should school supervise better?

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I really don't know if I'm overreacting. DS 6yo, diagnosed with autism. Have frequent meetings at the school and end up keep explaining the same things over and over. They seem kind and have good intentions, I don't think they're uncaring or unkind staff. I feel like I'm always telling the school he struggles calculating risks. For the past 1.5 years he's been at a desk with a TA to keep him on task and presumably safe, he works well in this set up.

Yesterday, the TA wasn't in and the teacher thought it was a good idea to mix the table groups up to experience working with other people. The TA that was covering and the teacher were circulating around the class. So he wasn't in his usual table set up and had no supervision at times and they were doing cutting and sticking.

So, my son cut his fringe and the other children told on him. Nobody told me I just noticed he has a fringe now. I don't mind about the haircut I care that he had scissors near his eyes. When I told them I'm worried about scissors near his eyes they've told me that their scissors probably won't cut skin and that they'll now be more aware with him and scissors.

My issue is that I've told them he has almost zero danger awareness, it's really scary to me. Every time some accident happens I say "yeah, he's not aware of possible dangers and risks. Even when they're explained, he often won't believe something is actually dangerous." They say they get it. Then something else happens. They have replied to me as if they didn't know something could go wrong with him and scissors. I think "unaware of dangers" should cover scissors? I'm worried if I give a list an accident will happen with something I've forgotten to put on the list or something we've never done at home before.

My second issue is that having blunt scissors banged into an eyeball isn't a cut on the skin. I'm worried he could blind himself or someone else. I'm not worried about his hair or skin vs kids scissors, just eyes. But I feel that the school don't think that is a risk.

Am I overreacting and should chill out?

Or should I try to come up with a list of specific dangers and not just say unaware of dangers in general.

Or should I give up trying to communicate about this and look for a different school?

If he genuinely has no awareness of danger then he needs a 1-2-1 at all times. Blunt paper scissors are no more dangerous than, say, a pencil in his eye or up his nose, or an eraser he could swallow.

Same. Most kids do it at some point. My older sister cut herself a fringe aged about 7, so did my niece when she was about 5. It's a normal (albeit annoying) thing kids do. And there isn't a sea of blind kids out there. Chill a little bit.

Pencils are probably more dangerous to eyes than primary school scissors. If he tends to poke things into his face or other people’s faces then I would be concerned about this. If he doesn’t generally do this then I think I would see scissors as a similar risk to most classroom equipment that is used at this age.

As a TA, we cannot watch just one child the whole time if they do not have a 1-1. And even then it's possible for things to happen! Parents do need to help their children and be pro active in helping support them. You could print off social stories to help him understand the dangers, practice at home etc. schools are under enormous pressure these days and parents have to do their bit! Sorry bad day at work dealing with unruly children!

You need to get a Support Plan in place while you apply for an EHCP. I would arrange a meeting with the school SENCO as a matter of urgency. Explain your concerns and ask if they are applying for an EHCP because if not then you can. Regardless, they have a duty of care to your son and they need to put things in place to meet his needs. Scissors are very blunt at school so I wouldn’t worry too much about that but if he has no sense of danger then things can be put in place to mitigate the risks.

Haven't read all the replies yet, but yes I do worry about pencils too. Not so much pens, they use felts tips. Maybe it is an arbitrary line to draw. Just scissors, even blunt, seem more scary near the eye than a pencil. Especially with him because he likes using scissors and in my mind I can see him just carrying on to whatever is next to the last thing he cut.

He does draw on himself, usually his hands. But I've thought he was on the TA table for 1.5 years, everyday, so I wasn't as worried. I didn't know until yesterday that sometimes he might not be on that table.

It's also that I'm worried I've not communicated well enough. I think I'm worried that the accidents will keep getting worse and one day I'll find out he walked off a cliff. I'll say but you know he doesn't have much awareness of danger and they'll say but you didn't tell us he had a cliff issue.

I am going to read more, thank you everyone for replying.

To be fair a blunt pencil could damage an eye if shoved into it so they may be struggling to understand the concern with scissors in particular.
It does sound like there's a general lack of awareness about autism, I'm not sure why they would mix up the tables on the day his TA was off, that sounds like a lot of change in one day. Therefore, they may be lacking awareness of just what the level of risk is with him and just how important the supervision is. As parents we usually have a good grasp on what risks they understand and may find it hard articulating it. If the teacher lacks awareness of additional needs they may just assume he is at the same level as all 6 year olds.
I would try and clearly point out why he needs higher supervision eg does he put small items in his mouth, would he know to stop at a road, would he know not to put hands in the toilet, would he know not to wrap things round his neck. Any examples of you having to intervene to stop him being harmed would also be good to provide the evidence. Any assessments from professionals would be good too, is there anything recent from consultants who assessed his development to say he is at x age. If his level of understanding and perception of risk is evidence to be at 18 months for example, that might drill home to them that he requires a much higher level of supervision.
Definitely make an application for and EHC needs assessment. You can make a request yourself.

I'm sorry, but this is the issue with school staff. Huge lack of understanding of disabilities. All the work in the world from parents can not enable some autistic children or children with learning disabilities to understand risks. I work with adults who have had lots and lots of work done throughout their life and still just can not perceive risk. Same with potty training-lots of disabled adults are never fully continent. It's not as simple as parents 'doing their bit' They are usually giving it their absolute all and those who lack awareness assume they're not doing enough

None of this is anything I'd be remotely concerned about.

But it's not his TA? It sounds like it's a general TA for the class. Until now she has sat at a table that this child has also been sat on.
Like someone else has mentioned it is usually bad practice to have all SEN children grouped together and it's not unusual for the class to be mixed up each term.

It sounds like the poster has quite a lot of anxieties, has there been a meeting with the teacher and senco? Schools need to support parents too, so if that's helping direct to services to help with anxiety and children with sen that's something they could offer.

I have nearly 15 years experience of working with young children and their parents. Our school has a very high number of children with sen. You don't work in a school so how can you tell me my experience is wrong? Of course we have children with medical issues which mean they are in nappies. I would never blame a parent for that or assume they hadn't done their bit at home. Parents of ALL children need to start doing more. I'm so sick of seeing parents on their phones at pick up, no interaction. No bedtime stories...
The op is worried about her child being left alone with a pencil, how are 2 adults to 30 children meant to deal with that?!

I understand your worries but there won't be a "TA table" in every class. It's not a thing in most classrooms now. My only TA hours are from EHCP funding. Hopefully he will get the EHCP but in the meantime you need to actually clarify with the SENCO what is in place for him, especially as he goes up the school. The way you are describing him sounds as though he is developmentally years behind his peers in which case I'm surprised he is got to year two without an EHCP.

Although that said I've taught for 15 years and taught lots of ND children but none of them have ever stabbed themselves in the eye with scissors or a pencil. I have had NT children cut their fringe or bits of their hair. Children do randomly do that and it doesn't lead to hurting themselves. Does you child do things like this at home?

OP this is only going to get much tougher as your child gets older.

As a mum to ND child now teen, the school might want to do all these things but if the additional needs are such that extra attention and help is needed intensively, the school are going to be at breaking point trying to deliver.

I am always pushing back on school but the reality is they're screwed over with a huge growing SEN population and what looks to me like bugger all resources to deal with it.

You need an EHCP if these are the needs already.

If they’re not a TA for your DS then they won’t be able to sit with and look after your DS all the time or even every day. There are probably 30 children in the class and the TA is for all of them. It’s great that your DS sits with the TA most of the time but it’s not reasonable to expect this all the time. You can’t blame the teacher and one TA for not supervising your DS with scissors, again there’s 30 children. If your DS needs his own TA then that needs to be in his plan.

Kindly, I think you're over reacting and have expectations of school staff that are impossible for them to do.

A sharpened pencil is far more of a risk than blunt scissors in a classroom. Even the blunt part of the pencil would likely do more damage than scissors.

Does he really have absolutely no danger awareness? Or are you perhaps perceiving dangers where there is a limited risk? It's unlikely he's been supervised constantly at school, and there have been no injuries yet. Have there been any other perceived near misses?

I will get the EHCP started then. I think I must have been kidding myself that he might not need formal 121 and that he just needed a little bit extra help. I didn't know a lot of things that have been said, like that there shouldn't be all SEN children on one table.

And, yes, I think because I've only spoken about the risk and danger stuff it sounds like he is completely dependent for everything. He's very capable in other ways and that's why the school and myself haven't been sure what he should have in place. He's not always jabbing things in his eyes, it's more that he will drift away from the activity and then he's just doing whatever he feels is interesting and isn't very good at remembering the scissors are sharp or the pencil point is sharp. Someone nearby reminding him to stay on task has worked so far. I just didn't know that without an EHCP this could all change in one day and I wouldn't know or be able to do anything about it until pick up.

I wouldn't want someone staring at him waiting for him to do something wrong, that's far too much and why I didn't think he needed 121 support. What had been happening I thought was working perfect, I didn't know it shouldn't be happening. Now I do I'll try and fix it.

Thank you for all the replies. It was helpful to talk about it and hear lots of different things.

I know nothing of your experience and didn't claim to, I said lack of understanding which is blatant in your posts. You've told the OP she needs to do her bit which is massively patronising and minimises the struggles, judgement and worries parents of disabled children face.
No, 2 staff can't manage 1:1 supervision for a child in a class of 30. The school should've pulled their finger out and applied for and EHC needs assessment rather than always sitting him with the class TA and making them the child's 1:1 by default.

Ah yes. The school should have pulled their finger out to apply for an ehcp, not the child's parent. I think you have zero idea of just how much strain the education system is sadly under atm.

There have been injuries and he hasn't been constantly supervised at school. Just when they're working at their tables. His head is hurt a lot because his balance and awareness is bad. Several times at pick up he comes out with a big cut or bump and I ask the teacher if they know what happened and they'll say 'oh he didn't say he'd hit his head' and I have to say for the umpteenth time 'he won't tell people that he's hurt'. He's choked at school too and needed to be picked up and medically checked afterwards. And he's been very hurt by another child stamping on him and he wouldn't tell the teacher. It feels like there is a lot that no adult sees in his school. But, they tell me that he painted on the wall or scribbled in his workbook. So they do see things sometimes, and obviously they noticed him choking and saved his life that day and I'm forever grateful for it.

Because he is capable in other ways I think people forget that in specific areas he's way behind other children. Because I'm used to him I think I probably don't explain his needs well enough or downplay them because it's our normal. I would prefer to be overreacting and not have to do anything about it.

There is really very little danger awareness. Sometimes I can't believe the things that I'm saying, you wouldn't think you would ever have to explain these things to someone. Sometimes he is aware but will calculate how to deal with it wrong like now he might notice a car coming (he didn't used to) and will run in a random direction into something else, instead of to somewhere safer. Sometimes he's aware but he just doesn't believe you, like he's quite sure he won't be hurt or die if he jumps out of a high up window. And sometimes he's aware of things that don't matter, like roses, he's overly concerned about rose thorns.

We talk about all this stuff over and over, he has social stories, he has comic strips he has practice with all of these things, he can recite it all back to you verbatim. When it comes to doing it, it just doesn't happen.

Yes the school. The educational professionals who should pick up on needs, should be tracking the childs development, creating and implementing SEN plans that form the evidence for the EHC needs assessment as that needs to be tried and presented as evidence before applying. The school will need to provide that evidence regardless of who applies. Not all parents are aware of the process, it is up to schools to ensure their pupils are adequately supported.

In an ideal world, yes. The education system is on its knees though...teachers are leaving or going off on long term sick with stress. The sheer amount of children with additional needs has gone through the roof. Children with English as their second language has risen dramatically. Each parent needs to be championing for their child so they receive the support they need and deserve.

You're very fortunate that he is getting so much input without an EHCP.

As for the fringe cutting, school scissors are almost all-round-ended and blunt. It's highly unlikely that he could have done himself even moderate damage with them.

I know a SENCO who works part-time. She spends most of her day at home catching upon admin from school. She works her socks off, but there is no chance of her being able to do everything she feels she should.

Our daughters school has banned phones at pick up. If a parent has to take an urgent call at that time they can message school office to say they are running a few mins late and will collect their child from there.
In a term of this being in place, this has hapenned a total of twice. Which shows that parents do not actually need to be on their phones at pick up. As a governor I expected we would see quite a bit of push back "dont tell me what to do brigade", but apart from a bit of grumbling from parents in the queue, there has been none. Parents are now communicating with each other and their children and there is a happier more vibrant atmosphere of chatting and laughing at drop off and pick up. If you are fed up of seeing phones, maybe try doing the same
Homework is Oracy tasks, videos have to sent in each week of a different task, again to encourage better commuinication at home and build children as more confident communicators.

That is lovely to hear! 😊

Absolutely this. I've taught KS1 for a long time and accidents happen in a blink of an eye. We cannot watch 30children all at the same time.