To be constantly surprised that people 'don't drive'?

[MissEloiseBridgerton]

Every day on here, and on my own social media, I am shocked that soooo many people don't drive. My local FB group is constantly people asking for favours because they don't drive, they want a dump run, or someone to deliver second hand stuff to them. On here, the barriers to work, to childcare, to anything is so often that they don't drive!

For me growing up, learning to drive was just what you did. I don't have any friends who didn't learn to drive at 17. Most had cheap runarounds or borrowed parents car.

I totally understand it's expensive and costly to run a car but I don't think I realised how many people never learned!

Thank you for not driving 🙏 😊

Why is it sad? People spend their whole life living in London. That doesn't mean they don't travel to other places. There are planes, buses, trams, trains.

Where it is a problem is some rural areas but you potentially never need to go to those. There are many interesting places to see that are accessible by public transport, including the lucky rural places that have a decent bus service.

As an example we often go to Jersey and use buses and our feet when there. The Jurassic coast bus is another example of a bus that allows non-drivers to access nice places.

But we can and do drive as well. And I still think it's an important thing to do if you can if only to ferry kids and elderly relatives to sport events and hospital appointments.

(although I understand why some people find it terrifying and new road systems make it worse with massive roundabouts, flyovers etc. But you can stay within your comfort zone and just drive locally, it's not a requirement to drive from Aberdeen to Bristol if the bus will do the job for you!)

Yes, I agree - people who retire to isolated rural areas with no trains and no buses are very short-sighted. I would never live in a town without a railway station (on the assumption that we don't get another set of Beeching type cuts at some point, but I don't think we will in my lifetime).

@NeverDropYourMooncup none of them were poor or disable. Stop making crap up! They couldn’t be bothered as wasting money at the pub was their priority.

Why would that be sad? I think living rurally would be incredibly boring personally but it's not my life and I don't think that people who do so are "sad".

It's a privilege having the means to learn to drive and to buy a car. You are dead right it's a barrier and a hard one to overcome.

I learnt at 17 - didn't have my own car after for a good while, but I had passed and used dad's car sometimes/when I was home from uni.

Cost will be prohibitive for many.

We lived rural and both parents drive so it was the norm/fairly essential. Maybe less so if you live in a city/town with decent transport or your parents don't drive.

Some people can't drive for medical reasons.

I also think some people just can't do it - like some people are just not meant to be drivers! My Nan apparently tried learning and just couldn't get it at all 🤣

I am a psychologist and I’ve never needed to drive, including throughout my doctoral training which involved numerous placements. Driving is not a ‘life skill’. So much unchecked privilege in this thread.

I didnt learn until I was well into my thirties. Lived in London. Had no need to drive.

If I hadn’t become a parent, I’d never have learned.

It’s a useful skill when you’ve got kids, but dull. The minute it stops being useful, I’ll give it up.

Court? All our solicitor roles are advertised car user essential (there is a disability exemption)

No, no. It’s fabulous.

I’m very happy nature is out there doing whatever it is nature does - with its trees and owls and marmosets and whatever - but I have absolutely no desire to live in it.

Every time I see an urban fox I feel like congratulating it on its life choices.

"I think it's a bit of a myth that people who don't drive are constantly cadging lifts off friends and family."

You've clearly not met my wife's parents.

If you live in London , driving us actively discouraged - low traffic neighbourhoods, congestion charge, limited parking and super expensive insurance - so hardly a surprise that young people - who are already struggling with the cost of living, don’t invest in a skill they have no need for.

Do you work?

I can’t drive. I mean, at one point I really could drive a car but I never made it to my test.

I was so confident and then had 2 tests cancelled due to various covid restrictions.
Then had a MC and had to have surgery two days before the test was booked, I was too traumatised to do it that day so my instructor cancelled.

Got a test for months later when I was almost 30 weeks pregnant. And guess what that was cancelled! My instructor refused to prioritise me when I was able to get a cancellation from a website.

So there are people like me. It’s not for want of trying. I am also dyspraxic but I got to a level where I was confident before the stupid cancellations. It will probably be once DS is in school, a couple of years from now, that I might have time. Otherwise, with good public transport near where we are and a lot of accessible places to visit on foot we definitely manage!

Agree. I'm amazed at the number of "girls" of my age (20) who can't drive. Afaic it's vital - not because I live out of town (I don't - I live about 10 mins walk from a train station, about 7 mins bus ride from a tube), but for convenience and SAFETY. Women need to be able to drive - it's no good going to a party and HOPING someone will be going your way afterwards (or walking to a station at 11.30pm!) - or hoping the boy you're with is sober enough to drive.

But what if the woman in question wants to have a drink at the party?

PS, my lack of driving ability has been playing on my mind recently and now this pops up! 😂

@NPET Odd post. Considering most people drink at parties, and won’t be in a fit state to drive home after. Most women will share taxis or arrange someone to pick them up. Women don’t NEED to be able to drive, lots of people can’t for various reasons - regardless of their sex. There’s a weird under current of victim blaming to your post, and a very dated attitude too… ‘hoping the boy you’re with is sober enough to drive’?! This isn’t the 1950s.

Nobody has ever asked me if I can drive for a job. It's never come up, not once, in 25+ years. I have never asked anyone if they can drive in a job interview either. I run a small-mid size org.

Isn't it funny how people can live in such separate worlds in the same country.

Finance sector in the City, big 4 before that.

MN is so weird about driving. I drive and have a car, but barely use it. I think drivers just don't see the way in which their cars might be limiting them. Sure, my car-free colleagues probably won't move to some rural farm house. At the same time, MN is full of people who would not consider moving to a house that does not have its own driveway, effectively limiting them to the suburbs or rural areas. My work's carpark is often full at 7:30am, with people arriving earlier and earlier to beat the traffic and/or find a parking spot. Meanwhile I can leave home at 8:40 on my bicycle and be at work 15 minutes later.

Yep.

I employed people for jobs that would take them to client sites all over the country, and indeed the world. Not once, in the hundreds of interviews I conducted, did I ever ask anyone if they could drive.

I didn’t ever get round to learning. It inconveniences no one except for my husband.

I leave for work around the same time I used to leave for the bus, and earlier on weekends and 'busy' days - because the parking in the town I work in is diabolical, especially during peak seasons, weekends etc.
The journey itself takes around the same amount of time, but I'm then driving round and round looking for somewhere to park.
There's something quite ironic about walking further to get to your car than you would the bus stop!
I also have the same issue at home depending on what time I get home as I live near a fast food place and it's often full of cars for there - again something quite ironic about walking further from where I've needed to park, and then having to go back and move it later, than I would have from the bus stop and not had to go out again!

I have left my car at home on some days where I've known it's going to be ridiculous trying to park and I'd have to walk miles, and again late at night on my own, and got the bus there and back.