Am I being prudish, or do I have a point?

[AmIJustAPrude]

NC for this.

I've just sent the following email to a company I ordered underwear from:

I've just received my order confirmation and was quite shocked by the accompanying image. I don't want to screenshot it to resend, so hopefully you can work out the image I mean: it is of two women/girls lying on their fronts outside wearing black pants.

The woman (I hope) or girl on the left is very thin, which immediately made me assume she was a teenager. One of her breasts is clearly visible.

I'm not prudish about breasts at all, but it made me extremely uncomfortable to receive an image of what appears to be an almost-naked teenage girl. Given you also sell bras, it seems totally unnecessary for her to be completely topless.

I recommend you review the images you send out to your customers, as this has put me off using your company again.

As I say, I don't have an issue with breasts- I've breastfed in public many a time. It was mainly the fact that, based on her body shape, the woman/girl in the photo looks very young (post-pubescent, but pre-adult) and the exposed breast was completely unnecessary.

So what do you think: did I overreact?

In my defence, they'd cropped her hand out of the picture along with her face!

To be fair OP, whichever poor customer service agent will be on the receiving end of your email will probably have a good laugh at it. Then they’ll probably show it round the rest of the office for everyone else to be in bemusement of and laugh at too.

Don’t send an apology, just wait for their response.

They’d also be able to see the dodgy emails you’d received, including one that features someone’s elbow.

Pants in a basket? Very seventies

I'm sorry if I've offended you.

Storm in a b-cup as they say!

YANBU to raise it - definitely a good thing to keep an eye out for the normalisation of paedo pics, which IS happening.

Ah so I was looking at the right photo and I thought her out of focus elbow was a breast too, so yes even more unreasonable than I first thought OP 😂

I wasn't saying she looked unhealthy, incidentally.

Well I voted YABU as I viewed the picture before voting.

You complained to a company that you could see the elbow of an adult woman 🤦🏻‍♀️
This thread will have to go down in the mumsnet annals of bizarre posts.

N.B, op, that is annals, as in “historical records”. Not a sex act 🤣

She’s already said she’s a lesbian and therefore I assume a woman.

Don't know your boob from your elbow? 😂

Thing is, most of us just glance at images and draw (ahem) our own conclusions as to what we see. We rarely look at them with the scrutiny that we've been doing on this thread. So OP, if you saw that and thought it was nip, plenty of other people would do the same. AND cropping out the face did sort of de-qge the woman.

I think you've done the right thing in pointing it out. They're obviously a responsible company and will not want to seem to be showing pictures of teenagers' breasts, even though they're actually not. So you've given them a chance to change it, AND to turn this thread's exposure into something positive.

She's bloody not though

Never read such nonsense.

I mean, I know some people thought elbows were sexy but this takes it to a new level

I hadn't seen that when I replied.

I am not sure why the police would be bothered if a FEMALE has marketing material on their phone about bog standard FEMALE underwear 🙄

I might even have things about male underwear on my phone and I am a woman.

Please link to that to make me feel less alone in my stupidity!

No, just send them a link to this thread 😂

I know. I think what you said was fine. I'm pretty sure most people presented with that image would suggest she is a younger woman.
Of course we all know that plenty of older women are slim, but looking at her skin, she is clearly not in her 50s.

OMG it's an elbow.
Absolutely giggling at myself for being too myopic to see that properly FFS

I was going to vote YABU due to "thin" being conflated with underage. However I had a look at their website and I find it very disturbing that they're selling knickers with incredibly childish prints and colours for grown women. Pink with stars, pastel leopard print, hot pink with rainbow spots. WTF. That same style of underwear is literally only sold in toddler, girls and teenage sections in mainstream stores.

It definitely smacks of encouraging grown women to cosplay as underage girls for men of extremely dubious taste. Without going into too much detail, there are multiple porn categories where actresses wear children's knickers with cute patterns and designs to make them appear like teens (or worse). That brand seems to be playing heavily into the market under the guise of being comfortable or sustainable. No other lingerie company offers adult size knickers with those sort of kiddy designs on them.

I am not offended

I am just pointed out the hypocrisis and double standards

If I had started a thread complaining about the "rolls" on the other woman's body (your words), you can see how quickly it would have been deleted for fat-shaming.

Women "too thin so she looks like a teenager" on the other hand 🙄

It's embarrassing that women (or anyone) can feel smugly allowed to make such nasty judgements.

@mollymazda sorry if I 'triggered' you.

They do indeed put bearded men in tights. They use grossly overweight models as a kink. They sold badges bigging up choking.

So perhaps educate yourself on what Snag actually do before getting yourself in a woke type tizz

From what you’ve said so far, I think you did the right thing. It seems it was unnecessary to send that particular image to customers (given that the company could easily add a bra), so it seems it was done because either ‘sex sells’ or for the shock effect. If it’s done because ‘sex sells’ then presumably the image is mainly aimed at men and so it seems a bit yuck to be sending images where the model ‘looks’ like a teenager (even if, in fact, she is older than this).

Of COURSE it’s fine for the model herself to do these photos regardless of her shape or
size, but that’s not the issue here - it’s more to do with the company’s motivation behind sending the image in emails and the implications.

I likely wouldn’t have noticed the image nor been too bothered about it but I’m glad you did and were; so I think you were right to send that email. Maybe the company in question will choose their images more carefully in future.