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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To share some weight loss tips?

123 replies

Jumell · 05/01/2025 11:43

Losing weight is very hard and I want to give support to ANYONE who’s embarking on it - whether it’s by calorie deficit/exercise alone or by getting medical help.

Last year I lost 3 and a half stone between January and May by keeping my calorie intake each day at 1200 or less, doing cardio/weights at least 3 times a week and drinking more water (up to max of 2 litres a day).

I was very determined to do it. These are some tips :

  1. its very important you keep your weighing day ‘sacred’ e.g it’s fine to overindulge as a treat on weight loss day and even eat 4000 Cals , for instance on that day - but you MUST make the calorie deficit up by the same day next week eg if Monday is weigh in day

2.its important to keep exercising if you don’t feel like it - youll feel better next day

  1. have non food related treats to hand eg magazines (not THOSE ones) 🤣, new 2025 calendars. TV programmes etc
  2. Diarise your weight weekly
  3. if you feel a bit down one day and are finding it hard going - have something nice - I did this last January - nice latte in a coffee shop and it actually helped me stick to it

sorry my paragraphing is all over the place but you get the gist !!

OP posts:
BogRollBOGOF · 05/01/2025 15:45

Building and keeping your muscle is what will keep you moving and functioning in your later years. A significant factor in metabolism change in older women is reduced muscle from reducing movement. I exercise a lot but I'm finding that a lot of the incidental movement I had when the DCs were younger is drying up now I'm in my 40s and it's a pain to manually replace. I'm short so my energy needs are below average, but it's well work banking a few hundred calories of movement so I don't end up needing to eat half of what my ravenous teenagers and husband scoff or pick at salads for the rest of my life. I want life to be long and healthy, not just feel tediously long Grin

I don't diet, but I do have to manage what I eat at a sustainable level.
Water
Movement
Vegetables
Protein
Whole fats (good quality)
Reduce simple carbs
Avoid sweetners (they make me feel lousy and taste rank)
Avoid drinking excess calories (especially alcohol)

I have little patience for calorie counting but I do check in with MFP if I need to review my habits to check portion sizes and any habits that have crept in. I mainly concentrate on food quality and proportions and use smaller plates.

It's stood me in good stead through youth, losing two rounds of baby-weight in my 30s and staying healthy into my 40s, and I've maintained a pleasurable relationship with food.

Moonshine5 · 05/01/2025 15:48

You can't eat it, if you don't buy it.

Brush your teeth after your meal.

BusySittingDown · 05/01/2025 15:56

Moonshine5 · 05/01/2025 15:48

You can't eat it, if you don't buy it.

Brush your teeth after your meal.

Don't brush your teeth too often and wait at least an hour after food, or you can remove the enamel.

ChristmasKelpie · 05/01/2025 16:06

For me it was exercise. I spent an hour on the cross trainer and weight machines, went straight home and ate my main meal, i ate whatever i wanted. Still drank way too much vodka and diet coke every night and smoked at least a packet of fags everyday but as long as i hit that cross trainer i lost weight.
Everyone has to find what works for them. I lost 5 stone in less than a year and had no excess skin. But my way wouldn't work for everyone.
Glad to say i gave up the nightly half bottle of vodka and 20 fags habit.

Schoolchoices25 · 05/01/2025 16:13

I think you have to give a bit more colour

1200 calories daily and your exercising 3 times a week and you're 3 stone overweight - BUT you're 5"4 is a completely different thing to being 5"9, 3 stone overweight and surviving on 1200 calories per day. I'd be really really ill. I'd have no energy. I'd be fainting.

My BMR is 1700 - that's how many calories I burn literally laying in bed. An average day for me and I burn 2500 calories just going about my normal day because I'm really tall and I've got a solid build - e.g to give a celebrity type of reference - I'm more Kate Winslet than Kate Moss - not that I have a figure like Kate Winslet - just making the point their body compositions are completely different.

I appreciate where you're coming from, you've been on a weight loss journey and these things worked for you and you want to be helpful and share that - but you do need to put in more facts so that someone else could take the guidance but apply it to their situations.

That requires knowledge of BMR, TDEE - body composition and other varying factors.

Alainlechat · 05/01/2025 16:22

Well done OP on your weight loss.

I lost similar last year by following the Fast 800 and then increasing calories to still lose more slowly and then maintain weight. I also picked up the exercise as well.

Due to an injury I haven't done much exercise since November but have started again this week. I have also put on a few pounds in December and am now above my target weight. I have set myself a new target of being back to my goal weight by the end of Jan.

How are you planning to get back on track? For me weighting at least once a week helps to keep myself accountable.

Jumell · 05/01/2025 16:25

Alainlechat · 05/01/2025 16:22

Well done OP on your weight loss.

I lost similar last year by following the Fast 800 and then increasing calories to still lose more slowly and then maintain weight. I also picked up the exercise as well.

Due to an injury I haven't done much exercise since November but have started again this week. I have also put on a few pounds in December and am now above my target weight. I have set myself a new target of being back to my goal weight by the end of Jan.

How are you planning to get back on track? For me weighting at least once a week helps to keep myself accountable.

Thanks so much!

iI love the Fast 800!

Makes so much sense !

Im going to get on track my trying to prior exercise a bit more and do a greater variety of exercise!!

Also think of treats at the end to motivate me !!

OP posts:
Shrinkingrose · 05/01/2025 16:35

I also think the ops heart was in the right place. Howeve4 it is clear she doesn’t understand her body or nutrition and posted unhealthy advice. There are multiple unhealthy ways to lose weight. Hers is just one of them. Evidenced by the fact she gained a lot over Xmas. And now needs to go back on a diet.

i beleive if you’re going to go on line and give diet advise to many millions of people, you should at least spend 5 mins googling to see if you know what you’re talking about. It is not and should never be lose weight irrelevant of the unsustainable or health damaging nature of your diet.

Hibernatingtilspring · 05/01/2025 16:39

I'm 5ft 3 size 10 and in my forties, my BMR (ie the amount of calories I need to sustain life, the number that its not recommended to go below) is 1440.

Fast 800 was based on medical evidence of VLC diets for people who needed to lose weight in order to be able to safely have surgery. Even Michael Moseley acknowledged that most people shouldn't aim for an 800 calorie diet.

BashfulClam · 05/01/2025 19:43

Bodybutterblusher · 05/01/2025 14:03

It's not necessary to exercise to lose weight. Many people who are overweight won't be able to burn off enough calories to make a significant difference. It's still a good thing to do.

Weight yourself once a month. Sometimes the scales will seem stuck but then will make up for it the next month. I don't know why. It's most encouraging to weigh in at the same time of the month after you've had your period, not before. And the same time of day.

Cutting out milk is very effective. But make sure you take in calcium in other ways. Cutting out bread is also effective in my experience. But you have to make sure you're getting some carbs (oats are good) and you absolutely must have protein bulked out with vegetables.

Eat regularly and earlier than usual. Try not to eat anything between 6 in the evening and breakfast.

Don't let yourself get extremely hungry. Have an oat biscuit, satsuma and mug of hot water. Make meals ahead and portion them carefully, when you're not hungry. Have raw carrots ready to eat and don't be afraid to eat them.

Keep busy. Boredom magnifies hunger.

Remind yourself this is not a punishment but a goal that you want for good reasons.

If tempted to overeat, remind yourself of how good it feels to be doing something about being overweight. That feeling will go if you eat whatever it is you're wanting to eat. It's not a nice experience.

Don't think that fruit is calorie free. It really isn't.

Some people find treats helpful. I found that they tasted so extra delicious during a restricted intake period that I just wanted them more. Avoiding glucose and chocolate completely does make your brain forget about them over time. You may even find you find sugar too sweet eventually. At this start of a diet, your palate is dulled and you're effectively addicted to the emotional and physical high that comes with giving your body a burst of calories. Eating regularly and having an alternative like oat biscuits to starve off a crash will, over time, make more sense.

The first few days are hard in a way but the hardest point is about four weeks in. Your body is struggling and it feels neverending. Be prepared.

Protein is your friend. Think chicken and fish and eggs, not cheese and yoghurt.

Potatoes and root vegetables are not your friends. Dried fruit is out. You can eat lots of vegetables to bulk out meals more easily if you steam them. Kale, spinach, baby sweetcorn, carrots, peppers, mushrooms, aubergine, courgettes, cucumber, tomato - there are lots of foods that you can eat and need to eat.

Be aware of how much oil you're using. If you're being really careful with carbs and cutting out milk and sugar, you can afford to have oil but be aware that it's high calorie.

Take a multivitamin.

Check the portion size of whatever you have for breakfast.

A treat day prolongs the agony and those foods will taste better than they ever before.

Be prepared to spend more time prepping food and making sure you have something with you if you are out.

Over time, your stomach will get smaller and you won't feel as hungry. For this reason, I don't think it's a good idea to eat huge amounts of low calorie foods because it will keep your stomach the same size.

Have a weight below which you won't fall and agree this with someone who can hold you accountable. You're aiming for healthy, not a size zero.

Bananas are quite high in calories. Many people on diets seem to eat them like they're free food but they're not.

Don't have artificial sweeteners. They're bad for you, bad for your palate and tell your brain to expect a sugar rush. It won't be happy when it realises it's been fooled.

This will pass. It's like pregnancy. It feels forever at the time but when you look back, it was relatively short.

If you have really bad news and everything hits the fan, put the diet to one side for that day. It's better to make a decision than to beat yourself up for failing.

Don't talk in front of your kids about diet, weight loss and your body. Maintain the line that every body is beautiful and you are eating very healthy food because they're full of things your body needs to be healthy. Your diet doesn't need to become your child's eating disorder.

Drink a full glass of water when you get up. It helps.

I always find the 6pm cut off a very weird thing. I don’t get home from work till around 6.15pm so have never stuck to that and still lost tons of weight. Sometimes dinner is 7.30 or 8.

TorroFerney · 05/01/2025 19:50

SharpOpalNewt · 05/01/2025 13:34

I don't do exercise to lose weight, but to be fit and have good muscle tone.

It doesn't mean you have to go to the gym, I enjoy it but a lot of people don't. But everyone needs to be as active as possible, taking into account health, injuries and disability of course.

Quite agree. Listened to a podcast last year where the doctor was saying the muscles you are using to do your squats in your younger years are the muscles that mean you can get off the toilet and off the sofa without help in your elderly years. That means that you can probably get out of the house and will have a better , less isolated old age, loneliness being as bad for you as illness.

Shrinkingrose · 05/01/2025 20:00

TorroFerney · 05/01/2025 19:50

Quite agree. Listened to a podcast last year where the doctor was saying the muscles you are using to do your squats in your younger years are the muscles that mean you can get off the toilet and off the sofa without help in your elderly years. That means that you can probably get out of the house and will have a better , less isolated old age, loneliness being as bad for you as illness.

Yes that’s 0ne of the reasons I do it.

but the other reason to be honest, is it keeps me toned, so I look better both in and out of my clothes.

You can be a healthy weight,even slim, and look flabby or untoned. Flat bum, saggy boobs, bingo wings. Exercise keeps everything tight. And it’s very easy to recognise if someone doesn’t exercise, or does, even dressed.

BusySittingDown · 05/01/2025 20:10

TorroFerney · 05/01/2025 19:50

Quite agree. Listened to a podcast last year where the doctor was saying the muscles you are using to do your squats in your younger years are the muscles that mean you can get off the toilet and off the sofa without help in your elderly years. That means that you can probably get out of the house and will have a better , less isolated old age, loneliness being as bad for you as illness.

Yes, this exactly!

Plus if you're more mobile you'll be less prone to falls as you age. Strength and mobility training is important. You won't get as many aches and pains as you age either.

Tessisme · 05/01/2025 21:00

I normally hate to be the thread police, but this would have been better placed on the weight loss board. You're getting a terrible time here @Jumell. Congratulations on your weight loss and thank you for sharing what worked for you. And, for what it's worth, I think you have handled the barrage of abuse very graciously.

rainydaysandrainbows · 05/01/2025 21:08

Zebedee999 · 05/01/2025 13:38

OP simply spelt out what worked for her. Can't believe the pile on to her for starting a thread of ideas.

Totally agree

dizzydizzydizzy · 05/01/2025 22:22

I've lost 10kg/22lb since October. I am
Eating more veg, more pulses, more nuts, more olive oil and less bread, potatoes and chocolate.

DowntonNabby · 06/01/2025 08:22

dizzydizzydizzy · 05/01/2025 22:22

I've lost 10kg/22lb since October. I am
Eating more veg, more pulses, more nuts, more olive oil and less bread, potatoes and chocolate.

Are you tracking what you eat or just aiming for healthier food?

dizzydizzydizzy · 06/01/2025 09:09

@DowntonNabby I'm on the Zoe programme. That has an app. I log my food on there some days.

DowntonNabby · 06/01/2025 10:11

dizzydizzydizzy · 06/01/2025 09:09

@DowntonNabby I'm on the Zoe programme. That has an app. I log my food on there some days.

Ah, I'd love to do Zoe but I can't eat gluten/wheat and they haven't managed to produce a GF-version of the muffins yet!

Jumell · 07/01/2025 06:19

Zae134 · 05/01/2025 12:24

I have to disagree a bit here. I lost 9 and 1/2 stone over 12-13 months. It was very steady loss and I think that some advice you provide would have made the process very hard.

Namely, 1200 cals or less is very low for a lot of people. I used calorie counting myself, and I would encourage people to find the personalised number for their own body and to then update the number as they lose weight. Also, I would say that people need to take each day as it comes and put less pressure on weigh day. Otherwise, you end up saying "well I'll have a massive binge and just starve myself on Saturday". Then Saturday comes and you're so miserable/annoyed with yourself that you binge anyway and decide to have a better week next time.
If you are going out for a special meal then I say- great enjoy it! I never even bothered counting those calories because they were one-offs and didn't happen all the time. I just got back on track the next day, and as a result I never felt guilty or that I had to make up for anything so it kept me calm and steady.

Where I do agree is that exercise is important, it really helped keep my mood elevated and improved my self-esteem. I still hate the gym, so I just exercise in my living room using some YouTubers that I like, and try to get out for a nice walk where I can.

I also agree that having non-food related rewards is important. I found that I'd always viewed food as a reward and that I needed to have a bit of a shift in perspective, taking reward from nice activities (like a spa day).

Congratulations on your AMAZING weight loss. What an achievement 💪

And I agree - exercise use really improved my self esteem as well

OP posts:
Zanatdy · 07/01/2025 06:35

1200 isn’t that low when dieting for short women. Without exercise I only burn 1500ish calories so eating 1500-1600 as some suggest then i’d gain weight. I am a yo-yo dieter and lose and gain the same 10lbs often. Currently about to embark on losing it again and 1200 would be my absolute max. Obviously if you’re 5ft 10 and a lot heavier then 1200 might not be enough but for many women it is a realistic amount when trying to lose. OP is sharing what works for her, not everyone is going to be the same.

Cantfindtherightword · 07/01/2025 06:46

Jumell · 05/01/2025 11:43

Losing weight is very hard and I want to give support to ANYONE who’s embarking on it - whether it’s by calorie deficit/exercise alone or by getting medical help.

Last year I lost 3 and a half stone between January and May by keeping my calorie intake each day at 1200 or less, doing cardio/weights at least 3 times a week and drinking more water (up to max of 2 litres a day).

I was very determined to do it. These are some tips :

  1. its very important you keep your weighing day ‘sacred’ e.g it’s fine to overindulge as a treat on weight loss day and even eat 4000 Cals , for instance on that day - but you MUST make the calorie deficit up by the same day next week eg if Monday is weigh in day

2.its important to keep exercising if you don’t feel like it - youll feel better next day

  1. have non food related treats to hand eg magazines (not THOSE ones) 🤣, new 2025 calendars. TV programmes etc
  2. Diarise your weight weekly
  3. if you feel a bit down one day and are finding it hard going - have something nice - I did this last January - nice latte in a coffee shop and it actually helped me stick to it

sorry my paragraphing is all over the place but you get the gist !!

I haven’t read all the posts but this is something I feel strongly about so had to comment soon as I read your terrible advice/ideas. Please don’t encourage people to have 1200 or less a day. For many reasons mainly it’s not healthy or sustainable.

XWKD · 07/01/2025 06:53

I cut things out but I rarely weigh myself. Weight loss should be a consequence of dietary changes. I feel it if it's working. Weighing just puts the focus on the wrong thing for me.

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