To think this is rude and weird re a Christmas present

[bagpuss90]

I muddled up a friends present with another friends present . Genuine mistake and I apologised. Anyway I sorted it .One of the friends thought it was really funny. I took the other friend her “proper gift” last night and she was really shitty and weird. She said “don’t you ever do this to me again” WTF ?. Asked me if her gift actually ever existed before Christmas. Not even a thank you . AIBU to think this was rude and weird and a total over reaction ?

'dont ever do this to me again'.
Don't worry love, I won't. 🙄
Was she a devout vegan and the other gift was a huge tub of pate de frois gras?
Is she a virginal 79 yo nun and the other gift was a swingers club membership?

What a silly cow. 🤣

She said “don’t you ever do this to me again”

"Oh, don't worry. I won't."

[thin smile]

That all sounds a bit deeper than a Christmas present

I'd put a stop to Christmas presents after that, l'm afraid.
She was so rude and unreasonable she'd be lucky to get a card.
Friends don't behave like that.

If that was her actual reaction then yes it was rude. Are you sure you're not building it up bigger in your head? I sometimes do that if I feel bad for something.
My suggestion.... don't buy adult friends Christmas presents next year.

Or perhaps her perception of the two gifts is different from yours, OP.

Whereas you just wanted to give them each their favourite tipple, she might have felt self-conscious about her favourite being vodka while your other friend's is Prosecco, depending on her perception of the drinks or their pricing or other associations she might have.

She might wonder whether the other friend had rejected the vodka gift and that this is why you felt the need to go through the awkwardness of swapping them back - even if you turn up saying "oh, silly me, what a mix-up!", she might still be envisaging the other friend unwrapping the vodka and being horrified to the point of not even accepting it (especially if she happily enjoyed the Prosecco over Christmas!).

If she had said thanks for the gift initially, I probably wouldn't have taken it back from her once it was given - if the other friend didn't want the vodka, I would have replaced it with another bottle of Prosecco, but I don't think I would have requested the recipient give back a gift intended for someone else, especially not after Christmas when it might be too late for her to give it back.

I don't think she's upset about the mix-up itself, but about the way it's been handled and all the awkwardness around being asked to give back a gift she thought you'd bought for her.

Your update makes it clearer. Yes it's a weird reaction.

She sounds like an ungrateful twat. My inner child would've probably instantly replied with "Or what?" when she said that but I don't respond very well to other adults telling me what to do.

Was she being jokey and you missed the mark?

I don’t understand this at all.

Fantasy football

Maybe they're all one person, or else the OP just picks really crap friends

I wonder if someone had once thought they were an alcoholic so opening a bottle of vodka caused huge problems for them with family or something….

Has she form for speaking to you in this manner?
I wouldn’t be friends with someone who spoke to me like that…..bizarre!

I make my own cards too and sorry but that is irrelevant

I think you could be on to something there. She was obviously offended by the vodka for some reason.

Or maybe she opened in front of family, who were thinking, great I'll have that? Or they were thinking fizzy wine is acceptable to ladies but vodka isn't.

While her attitude is really odd but I'd be curious to what the real issue was.

Agree. I'd cool the friendship. Whatever her problem is, do not make it yours.

Possibly that when she was asked to hand it back, she’d already drunk it ?

Give her a bottle of wee next year, ungrateful mare

super weird reaction... honestly i wouldnt stay friends with the one who freaked out. also if it had been me i would probably just go with it, every household who likes cocktails needs both anyway :)

YANBU.

But, sometimes, I understand my friends are snappy or rude when under a lot of pressure, if I’ve unintentionally touched a nerve (maybe no one got her a thoughtful gift?) or if they’re pre-menstrual or menopausal.

If this is out of character for her, I’d forget it. If she’s always been like that, I guess you either accept it’s what she’s like and love her anyway, say you find it rude or focus on politer friends.

Yes or if she didn't drink it someone else did, partner, guests over Christmas.

It's such an odd reaction there has to be more to it.

Going against the grain but I'd be peeved if the giver suddenly changed my gift. You should have said nothing and then just given another bottle of Prosecco to the other friend as well as the vodka. Half a bottle of vodka is a bit miserable anyway. It should be a full bottle of alcohol if you're giving it. She sounds a bit rude but I think you were also a bit rude and thoughtless. Just my two cents.

Is she worried about her drinking or something and maybe thinks that you are giving her a message with the half bottle or is someone in her life giving out about her drinking.

Otherwise her reaction was super off and rude.

Personally I would have found it quite rude for someone to give me a gift and then want it back to swap for something else. It seems slapdash and lacking in care and that is not want what giving gifts should be or feel like to the recipient. It could also imply they are swapping because one of the friends had a ‘better’ gift than the other.
it sounds like you may have previously messed up gift giving if the put out friend told you not to do this again.