Colleague has thrown everything away that was on my desk

[WinkyTinky]

Back to work after Christmas and a few weeks off sick, to find that one of my colleagues who sometimes works at my desk has thrown away all of my papers. It was mostly handwritten notes about kids' appointments, my holiday plans, lists of things to remember about school, school calendars, and my eldest son's GCSE timetable. It was all personal sentimental stuff that I liked to have on my desk to see and remind me. I asked where it all was and he said that he has "got rid of all the crap." I'm really disappointed and a bit furious actually, but he thinks it's all perfectly fine. I know I'm a ridiculous softy about a lot of things, but this was MY stuff.

That's rotten, passive aggressive and plain mean. I would confront them and ask them why they thought that was appropriate.

If they get rude, report it as a grievance

It is a shitty thing to do. I would have bundled your paper stuff in a box n shoved it under the desk out of the way. However why you need all that laying about when you are working is beyond me. Work=work..home =home. Beggars belief why you need all that as a comfort blanket kind of extension from home.

Id complain. Don't let nasty little shits like him get away with stuff like that.

Look him in the eye and ask him why he has binned your personal items. Depending on his answer, why didn't he clear ALL the desks of "rubbish". Or "this is personal, it's like bullying"

and then leave it.
(and possibly clear his desk - i would but i am petty and vindictive and i never ever let anything go)

I’ve never worked anywhere that had a ‘clear desk’ policy.

Well I have - but no one would have done that this colleague did. It was up to management to enforce the policy.

Presumably OP has proved her worth as an employee through her actual work and doesn't need to display it via a bare and impersonal desk. Agree this would be an issue in some workplaces, but it doesn't sound like OP's is one of them.

in places i've worked with a clear desk policy there have been broadly 2 approaches to things left on desks which boils down to: stuff it in a drawer at that desk, or put EVERYTHING in one big box which is emptied once a week.

Every coffee cup and coat would be misplaced too 🤣

That’s your opinion. I’m a senior manager, and the colleague’s actions are likely not a disciplinary matter. So I’m not sure what you mean. It’s very unlikely that keeping personal stuff on display at work, is written in their policies. Policies benefit the employer.

How unreasonable and unnecessary! I too went off sick unexpectedly, ended up being off for almost 18 months, due to having to wait for surgery. Naturally when I went back to work, I wasn't expecting to get my desk back, and in all honesty was surprised that they'd even held my job open that long, but to my surprise, when I was given my new desk, in the drawer I found a carrier bag with all of my personal bits in. Someone had kindly bundled together my stuff when my post had had to be covered by other people, and kept it safe for me. Difference being - I worked with other women!! I'd give him what for OP, and next time he's off, would be sure to swipe anything personal off his desk straight into the bin!

Sounds like they share desks. To me reads more like OP feels entitled to leaving her crap out because she’s worked there for 14 years. A sleeping bag in the office too… WTF.

What a mean, ignorant thing to do. From what you've said @WinkyTinky you can file this bloke under W for Weirdo anyway so there's no point in confronting him or hoping he'll understand how upset it's made you.

Snuggle in your sleeping bag and fantasise about the time you'll be able to return the favour in some way - revenge best served cold, and all that and your time will come...

I'm not sure. It seems unreasonable and unprofessional to have this personal stuff all over your desk that you knew someone else would use.

People plotting revenge on this thread are a bit unhinged… opening yourself up to a bullying case if you start all that! Deary me.

I think you have been picked upon and from what you say, no one else would have had the same treatment. So you could call it harassment if you wished.

What a nasty piece of work. I’m outraged on your behalf op. I expect he has a very sad and lonely life, otherwise he’d have realised that these sorts of things matter. I take it he doesn’t live with anyone? Or if he does, he must be an absolute bully and an arse to live with. Op, build up a new collection of stuff. Keep it at home. And I guess the thing to remember is that you have your family, and the memories are still there. You can get a new timetable for GCSEs. Maybe he’s even done you a weird sort of favour by resetting your collection. Buddhism recommends detachment. He’s still an arse though.

How have you come to that conclusion?

you understand the concept of "hyperbole for comic effect" right?

in any case: if other desks have personal stuff on them and only OPs was cleared, it is very plain where the bullying complaint lies. And it is not with OP

I can’t imagine why it sounds like that, given that the OP has made clear they don’t share desks.

In future, you should keep your personal stuff in a planner or folder and put it away at the end of the day in a drawer.

I've not worked anywhere without a clear desk policy in about 20 years. I know you've said that your work doesn't have it but for going forward I'd keep my desk clear so that no one knows any of your personal info.

Sleeping bag in the office? You're having a laugh.

Have you quoted the right person? I haven’t mentioned disciplinary policy.

Of course I do - but even thinking about it is ridiculous! He’s not really done anything. Why does OP need a GCSE timetable? The ones for 2025 surely won’t be out yet so is it just some old tat? She’s not been bullied, don’t be ridiculous.

Given that she said he will have had to use it - then yes I think they do 😜

”to find that one of my colleagues who sometimes works at my desk has thrown away all of my papers.”

Hope he didn't use sleeping bag when you were off 😠

He is out of order, he must have had a look through them to see what was personal and what was work related or he could have potentially been throwing away work notes/paperwork.

If he had an issue he could have popped them in your drawer or in a tray!

Have you challenged him why it felt necessary to throw it away?