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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think this is strange from my neighbour?

470 replies

Pekitothebunny · 02/01/2025 10:43

This morning I woke up to a pack of Christmas cards that have been posted through my door. They are new Christmas cards, still sealed within their pack, unused. A note came with it saying “hi, it’s Janet from number 5. I bought these for you to send out to the neighbours next year”

Huh? Why would anyone do that? She’s isn’t my direct neighbour, she’s like 4 houses down. We don’t speak or have any kind of relationship. However, since we moved in a few years ago she has always sent us a Christmas card, and I assume she sends them to everyone on the street. We don’t bother with Christmas cards and never send them out. Could it be that she’s offended that we never send cards so this is her not so subtle way of hinting that she will be expecting a card from us in 2025?? Why would anyone care so much?

Im planning on just throwing the cards away and ignoring it. Would anyone else find this weird?

OP posts:
BustyLaRoux · 02/01/2025 11:16

WhatICallMyUsername · 02/01/2025 11:08

I would post the pack back with a note saying here are your cards for the next 10/20 years (depending on the pack size)

Ha yes, good suggestion.

LasagneLasagne · 02/01/2025 11:17

DuringDinnerMints · 02/01/2025 11:15

I would use them all to write her cards for the next ten years and post them all through her letterbox. "Happy Christmas 2027!" Etc. Job done.

You got there first! 😄

CouldItBeAnyMoreObvious · 02/01/2025 11:18

Dfg15 · 02/01/2025 10:45

I'd be very tempted to put them back through her letterbox with a note saying that you don't send cards to anyone, so will not need them to send to neighbours.

100% agree
Silly bint (Not you, OP!)

mygraino · 02/01/2025 11:18

That’s hilarious. If you’re not going to use them I’d just post them back to her rather than binning them, just being like I won’t use these so thought I’d give them back type thing.

Sunbeam01 · 02/01/2025 11:19

DuringDinnerMints · 02/01/2025 11:15

I would use them all to write her cards for the next ten years and post them all through her letterbox. "Happy Christmas 2027!" Etc. Job done.

This is SO FUNNY.

I'm actually laughing.

Jabbabong · 02/01/2025 11:20

Keep them until December and then stick a post it on the same unopened box
To Janet Happy Christmas from Pekitothebunny
Put it through her letterbox.

GinaDreamsofRunningAway · 02/01/2025 11:20

Does everyone on your street/close neighbours send out Christmas cards to the neighbours? Are you the only one that doesn't reciprocate? Maybe she is hinting that she thinks its rude that you don't join in?

Where I live there are 14 houses on on street, 7 on each side of the road and everyone on the street writes Christmas cards for everyone else, even new people that have moved in have joined in and do it too.

However if I didn't get one back one year from someone it honestly wouldn't bother me and I wouldn't give it another thought because I get that cards are a bit 'old school' now and lots of people are moving away from doing them now.

She is being a bit pushy and it is a bit weird.

DowntonNabby · 02/01/2025 11:21

I would return them with a note saying you appreciated the gesture but you don't send cards for environmental reasons.

Nikitaspearlearring · 02/01/2025 11:21

Tink3rbell30 · 02/01/2025 10:52

Its polite to send a card back, no excuse not to.

It IS polite, and I would if a neighbour sent me one. But the OP doesn't send cards to people she knows/likes/is related to - why the hell should she feel she needs to send them to neighbours? The neighbour needs to stop trying to control people.

OP, there are some great suggestions on here. Charity shop donation at the very least - please don't bin them!

rosehipstalk · 02/01/2025 11:21

Tink3rbell30 · 02/01/2025 10:52

Its polite to send a card back, no excuse not to.

No it's not. Its rude to assume that everyone celebrates Christmas - plenty of people dont (due to different religions etc) and the forced "you must send me a card despite the fact I dont even know your name" is rude AF.

I agree with sending them back saying you dont send cards due to the environment or whatever.

CouldItBeAnyMoreObvious · 02/01/2025 11:21

WaitingforStrike · 02/01/2025 10:46

I like her style! Has it never occurred to you to send her one back, in the years she's been giving them to you? Good manners surely.

No, it isn't bad manners not to send a card if you don't agree. That principle applies to most walks of life. Rather like when someone religious says they will pray for you, particularly when they know you are an atheist. How very dare they?
Tell your neighbour you don't believe in sending cards, but she is very welcome to do so as long as she keeps her beak out of your business.

TwattyMcFuckFace · 02/01/2025 11:21

If she really did this, then the best thing to do would be to return them with a note saying you don't send Christmas cards, but thanks.

No drama and you've made yourself clear.

viques · 02/01/2025 11:22

Ohnobackagain · 02/01/2025 11:07

@Pekitothebunny I’d just put them through her door with a note like ‘thanks for thinking of us but we make a small donation to charity rather than send cards and so I’m returning these for you to use. We won’t be offended if you decide not to send us a card in future, though we’re grateful for the ones you have sent us. Best wishes’

I think most people would do something similar, but this is mumsnet where all neighbourly relationships have to be approached as though the neighbours are Mr and Mrs Atilla the Hun,Mr and Mrs Ghengis Khan, Mr and Mrs Dracula and Vladimir Putin at number 27 who has three allocated parking spaces but still parks his tank on the road.

Nothatgingerpirate · 02/01/2025 11:23

Pekitothebunny · 02/01/2025 10:47

No, because I don’t send Christmas cards and I don’t know her. It’s up to her if she wants to keep sending them to me

Show quote history

Don't worry about it.
Ignore your neighbour, who obviously doesn't have many problems in life, and do with the cards as you please.
🙄

CouldItBeAnyMoreObvious · 02/01/2025 11:23

Tink3rbell30 · 02/01/2025 10:52

Its polite to send a card back, no excuse not to.

That's just daft.

devilspawn · 02/01/2025 11:23

Tink3rbell30 · 02/01/2025 10:52

Its polite to send a card back, no excuse not to.

What if you don't need an excuse because you just don't care

VegTrug · 02/01/2025 11:23

Dfg15 · 02/01/2025 10:45

I'd be very tempted to put them back through her letterbox with a note saying that you don't send cards to anyone, so will not need them to send to neighbours.

Do this. Don't be pushed around by her OP and make that fact clear to her by putting them back through her door with the note described above!

WaitingforStrike · 02/01/2025 11:23

CouldItBeAnyMoreObvious · 02/01/2025 11:21

No, it isn't bad manners not to send a card if you don't agree. That principle applies to most walks of life. Rather like when someone religious says they will pray for you, particularly when they know you are an atheist. How very dare they?
Tell your neighbour you don't believe in sending cards, but she is very welcome to do so as long as she keeps her beak out of your business.

Show quote history

It's not remotely akin to someone praying for you.

pizzaHeart · 02/01/2025 11:24

Bessica1970 · 02/01/2025 10:53

I’d post them back through her door with a note:

Thank you for thinking of us. We, however, don’t send cards as we believe they’re bad for the environment - instead we make a donation to an environmental charity to make up for some of the damage done by card sending.

We don’t judge others for sending cards though, so I’m returning these do you can get some use from them.

Do this^

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 02/01/2025 11:25

I'd write all of them to her and put 'do not open until Christmas 2025' 2026... 2027... etc... on the front and post them all back to her.

Greengagesnfennel · 02/01/2025 11:25

IamnotSethRogan · 02/01/2025 10:59

I'd post them back through her door with a nice note saying "thank you very much but we actually don't send christmas cards at all. Appreciate you thinking of us but you'll make better use of them. Happy new year"

You can put something about "due to environmental reasons we don't send them so I wouldn't want these cards to go tonwaste"

I like the first part of this message this is perfect.

don’t add the second bit or variations on it which others have suggested. It comes across pathetic passive aggressive superiority complex. Don’t start a war.

VegTrug · 02/01/2025 11:25

Tink3rbell30 · 02/01/2025 10:52

Its polite to send a card back, no excuse not to.

Nonsense! It's not a fucking law!!!! Everybody has a right to refuse to spend money on pointless printed card! 😂

Lucyaugust2007 · 02/01/2025 11:25

Are they nice cards?

Maybe make them into gift tags for next year's presents.

If she asks why you didn't send them out just say you don't send Christmas cards. Not many people do these days, myself included.

Lucyaugust2007 · 02/01/2025 11:26

Lucyaugust2007 · 02/01/2025 11:25

Are they nice cards?

Maybe make them into gift tags for next year's presents.

If she asks why you didn't send them out just say you don't send Christmas cards. Not many people do these days, myself included.

This year's presents even. 🫣

ThinWomansBrain · 02/01/2025 11:26

send her one next year, with something really minimal, like just your initial
and one the the year after
and one the the year after
and one the the year after...

how many cards in the pack? (and I hope that they are all the same deign)