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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be horrified I used to wake at this time every day?

237 replies

iusedto · 02/01/2025 05:08

At 18 months my previously crap sleeper started sleeping through (mostly) but swapped multiple night wakings for waking very, very early - 5-530 generally.

This lasted for around a year. Then he dropped his nap and sort of shifted that sleep to the morning. Gradually he’s been waking later and later and now sometimes I have to wake him. (Not often.)

I have a ‘new’ 18 month old who thankfully doesn’t seem as inclined to start the day when it’s still the middle of the night but she did just wake me about half an hour ago and I am waiting for her to go back to sleep.

But - AIBU to be horrified this was a habitual start time if you like for me once upon a time? I’ve given myself such a hard time about not properly enjoying ds as a toddler but I kind of think no wonder; I must have been sick with exhaustion!

OP posts:
magicalmrmistoffelees · 02/01/2025 07:11

Into my 7th year of 5am starts with my autistic son (often with multiple night wakings too). Yes, it’s tiring.

magicalmrmistoffelees · 02/01/2025 07:13

maxwellparker77 · 02/01/2025 06:57

Surely 5.30am isn't that much earlier than the time you would have been getting up for work prior to children?

It’s 2 hours earlier than I ever needed to get up for work.

Original poster
iusedto · 02/01/2025 07:15

magicalmrmistoffelees · 02/01/2025 07:11

Into my 7th year of 5am starts with my autistic son (often with multiple night wakings too). Yes, it’s tiring.

Flowers

That really must be exhausting.

OP posts:
Thepeopleversuswork · 02/01/2025 07:16

pelargoniums · 02/01/2025 07:07

It’s the way a 5am start means an extra meal or snack, and extra entertainment, adding to the slog. I remember once getting up with DD at some godforsaken hour, running out of activities so we did some baking, went to the shop for sprinkles while the cake cooled, then we iced and decorated it. I thought, “great! That’s the morning nearly sorted, just lunch then nap, day’s practically done”. Looked at the time: 8.40am.

Yes: what I found really depressing when I went through this was that it only me doing it so it was lonely and very boring. My ex was really crap at getting up with her at the weekends because he "worked hard" (yes dear). DD (now 14) woke up freakishly early even for a small child (usually between 4 and 5) so I would do some activity that felt like it took half a day and then another ridiculously long activity and even then no one else in the house was up by the time we'd finished.

I'm naturally a really early riser so I have no problem with an early morning but a very early morning with a child who can't talk but demands constant attention is very draining.

Stopsnowing · 02/01/2025 07:21

leafybrew · 02/01/2025 05:13

Hehehe - wait til you hit the menopause. I'm awake between 4 and 5.15 every single day. Have been like that for years.

Meh

I was about to say the same! By the time my kids started sleeping through I was entering the menopause with early waking every day. Still going on so I haven’t had a good nights sleep since before I was pregnant with my eldest - a long time ago.

Bunnycat101 · 02/01/2025 07:21

I struggled a lot with disrupted sleep. My eldest was a fabulous sleeper and then my youngest happened. I don’t think she slept through the night more than a handful of times between 1 and 4. She used to be up at 3am and then my alarm would go at 5.15 to catch my train and she was then often up before 6 at a weekend. It nearly killed me.

Now it’s 7.20 and I could have done with a longer sleep myself but am working and will need to wake up the kids so I can get them to holiday camp.

AlmostAJillSandwich · 02/01/2025 07:27

I'd honestly swap my sleep pattern for one where i was consistently up at half five.
As it is, i struggle massively to get to sleep, and then have awful nightmares and wake up frequently. If i'm lucky i have a sip of drink and can go back to sleep, but anything longer and it's over. Waking for a wee is a guaranteed not getting back to sleep, the getting out of bed to go to the toilet wakes me up too much. I can be so tired i cannot stop yawning, my eyes burn and i feel sick, but cannot fall asleep. I lie in the dark for literally hours. I'll get maybe 3 hours, be awake from 2am, not get back to sleep despite laying in the dark trying til 8am, go about my day, fall asleep at 6pm, sleep 3 hours, wake at 9, not sleep till 3pm, get 3 hours, be awake at 6pm, bot get to sleep again til mid day next day etc. I cannot ever get in to a day and night rhythm. I'm forever exhausted, can't make plans, let people down all the time, can end up barely talking to my partner for not being awake at the same time in the day etc. I'm on a wait list for ADHD to see if thats the issue, in therapy for PTSD incase thats the cause, but there's no medication i can take that doesn't interact with a necessary med im on that would help me sleep, no sleeping tablets, antihistamines that make you drowsy etc.

Ohhbaby · 02/01/2025 07:29

5/5h30 does not sound particularly early to me. Kids are often naturally early wakers. It's light outside in summer at 5. Winter is a bit sadder. I remember those first two hours in pitch darkness playing with the kids. But I wouldn't use the word horrifying. As i side note, for most of human history, people rose when the sun came up which was between 5 and 6 in summer in the northern hemisphere, but almost throughout the year in the southern hemisphere. They did go to bed earlier than us IG and social media scrollers though, I presume

Chellybelle · 02/01/2025 07:29

No I wake up at 3 most days to go to my first job.

Heatherbell1978 · 02/01/2025 07:31

Not horrified no. I'm also in peri-menopause and wake at 4am. This started just after my second child started sleeping through the night so I haven't slept in 10 years. Given MN is full of mums and peri-menopausal women you may not have the right audience here for empathy that you had to wake at 5.30 for a while!

Auldlang · 02/01/2025 07:33

It really depends your body clock, doesn't it? I'm a night owl, getting up at that time makes me feel ill as fuck. To most of the virtuous early risers on this thread who see no issue with it, it is probably easier as it fits their body's rhythms, but at least it gives them something to be self-congratulatory about too.

Mushroo · 02/01/2025 07:33

This thread is very skewed to morning people!

My LO usually gets up at about 8am (she’s 1) but today she woke at 6am for some reason and it’s killing me! I salute all of you with early risers.

I’ve always been a night owl, anything before 7:30am is far too early.

Partylikeits1985 · 02/01/2025 07:38

I used to get up at 5am to travel to work (early shift) in my 20s. A two hour journey. Not sure how I managed that now.

BoldExpert · 02/01/2025 07:39

what time do you go to bed?

BoldExpert · 02/01/2025 07:40

Auldlang · 02/01/2025 07:33

It really depends your body clock, doesn't it? I'm a night owl, getting up at that time makes me feel ill as fuck. To most of the virtuous early risers on this thread who see no issue with it, it is probably easier as it fits their body's rhythms, but at least it gives them something to be self-congratulatory about too.

Definitely not a morning person 🤭

BookishBabe · 02/01/2025 07:40

I have a child with autism who doesn't sleep well and is up from 3am every morning.
I just go to bed at 7pm with him! It's the only way I can get enough sleep to function.

Ineffable23 · 02/01/2025 07:46

I don't generally enjoy being up at 5:30 am but it's in the "not that bad" category for me. Anything pre -5am definitely makes me feel dreadful. Any time after 6am and I feel fine.
I'm relatively adaptable though - my sleep time naturally tends to shift earlier and earlier but e.g. when I was at uni and had 9am lectures I slept midnight to 8am without issue.

10storeylovesong · 02/01/2025 07:47

This reply has been withdrawn

Withdrawn at poster's request

BoldExpert · 02/01/2025 07:48

iusedto · 02/01/2025 06:54

@OrDis yes same … it’s miserable and makes the day so long.

only an issue if you aren’t particularly happy in life 🤷

TheFunHare · 02/01/2025 07:50

Our alarm usually goes off at 6:30 on school days and I'm dreading setting it again for Monday. It's been a lovely few weeks of lie ins and I know it's going to feel brutal.

OrDis · 02/01/2025 07:52

BoldExpert · 02/01/2025 07:48

only an issue if you aren’t particularly happy in life 🤷

Show quote history

Sheesh! Don’t be daft! Have you got small children and realise the relentlessness of it? I’m betting not!

Jk987 · 02/01/2025 07:53

ohyesido · 02/01/2025 05:18

This is my life and my DC long since grown up and moved out.

I love being up and about at 5am, it's so peaceful and a good opportunity to get exercise or admin done before the grind starts

There's a big difference between waking up and chilling with a coffee/doing yoga etc and having to entertain tiny children at that time!

Cluelesssanta · 02/01/2025 07:57

leafybrew · 02/01/2025 05:13

Hehehe - wait til you hit the menopause. I'm awake between 4 and 5.15 every single day. Have been like that for years.

Meh

Yes, I'm nearly through the menopause, both sisters are through it, and we are all 4 am awake for the day. I also wake every hour or so, where I was a solid 6 hour sleeper before.
YANBU though OP if that's early to you - hope things settle.

BoldExpert · 02/01/2025 07:59

OrDis · 02/01/2025 07:52

Sheesh! Don’t be daft! Have you got small children and realise the relentlessness of it? I’m betting not!

Show quote history

i did have
not now
and fair point

marmia1234 · 02/01/2025 08:00

From being a complete nightowl I have changed ( over about 9 months, to an early bird). My youngest needs to be up at 6 to get to school on time. I now wake at 6 on the weekends too. Like clockwork. Try an afternoon nap on the weekends ? Mind you I feel worse after a nap, but other people seem to like them.