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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think Afghanistan is the worst place to be born female.

78 replies

Adisgracetotheforcesofevil · 01/01/2025 16:01

Taliban bans windows to stop women from being seen at home | The Independent

Just when you think they is no other way for the Taliban to persecute women, they come up with this madness. What next?

Taliban bans windows to stop women from being seen at home

Buildings should not have windows looking into places where women could be sitting or standing, Taliban leader orders

https://www.independent.co.uk/asia/south-asia/taliban-afghanistan-ban-windows-women-b2672332.html

OP posts:
ElizaMulvil · 08/01/2025 12:59

SpringleDingle · 08/01/2025 12:52

I'm not sure India is in the same league. There certainly is huge poverty and women and girls often bear the brunt of that but women can be educated, can have jobs, can own property etc.. I work with many intelligent, highly educted and successful women in India who would not consider themselves opressed.

India has a caste system. Horrendous in this day and age ( or any ).

Cupcakemum79 · 08/01/2025 13:00

Every time a new restriction for women in Afghanistan comes out in the news, I just get angrier and angrier that literally no one seems to be doing anything about this. Where are the demonstrations in the streets, even in Europe? There seem to be demonstrations about everything but the horrible situation of women in countries like Afghanistan.
It also makes me wonder more and more where the men are in all of this? Do they genuinely only see women as objects, don't they care about there wives/sisters/daughters/mothers lives? Even if the women have been made completely powerless, surely the men could take some kind of action. They always seem to say that they don't really agree with the restrictions, but also refuse to do anything about it. Which makes me feel that actually they love the power they have got.
For some reason, I feel that Syria is on the brink of starting with a similar regime, surely the men have been used to living in a society where women have more rights that that. If they don't protest against taking away women's rights now, it will be too late, I'm afraid. They've already started saying that a woman 'because of the natural state' is less suitable for certain professions....
I think it's also very scary for us and our daughters, that more and more men with these kind of ideas seem to be living in our western countries as well and we are not allowed to say anything or be considered racist...

HappyPanda613 · 08/01/2025 13:05

Tweeteroo · 08/01/2025 12:53

Oh ok then. We have it soooo much worse in the uk. 🙄

Are you a British man by any chance? Why downplay it? Have you seen the likes of Jimmy Saville in any other country? I know I haven’t.

Whattodointherain · 08/01/2025 13:08

HappyPanda613 · 08/01/2025 13:05

Are you a British man by any chance? Why downplay it? Have you seen the likes of Jimmy Saville in any other country? I know I haven’t.

That's just some men. Not all men.
Are you saying UK women and children are suffering like Afghan women? Unbelievable.

SquirrelSoShiny · 08/01/2025 13:10

Lalgarh · 08/01/2025 11:18

I tried googling Margaret Atwood Afghanistan and it came up with a note that she went travelling there in the 70s and was 'inspired' by the sight of the Niquab covering.

She actually bought a f*cking Chador herself

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2001/nov/17/afghanistan.weekend7

She's mentioned asking for women to be included in the 2019 peace talks. But she prefers to doom monger about the regression in the US and do that snarky smile thing, what with the US being so much worse than Afghanistan

Margaret Atwood is a crushing disappointment to me. I have spent years wondering how the fuck the author of the Handmaid's Tale could hold her nutty views on Trans ideology. Her place as a liberal darling is more important to her than anything else now. It will taint her legacy.

HappyPanda613 · 08/01/2025 13:10

Whattodointherain · 08/01/2025 13:08

That's just some men. Not all men.
Are you saying UK women and children are suffering like Afghan women? Unbelievable.

The only reason this country is ‘safer’ than Afghanistan is because of strong feminist women who fought tooth and nail for our right to be considered second class citizens and not pieces of dirt on a man’s shoes. What we need to be doing is helping Afghani women achieve the same level of success we did, which shouldn’t be as hard considering British men are more misogynistic in general.

Tweeteroo · 08/01/2025 13:11

HappyPanda613 · 08/01/2025 13:05

Are you a British man by any chance? Why downplay it? Have you seen the likes of Jimmy Saville in any other country? I know I haven’t.

I think you're on a wind up. If you have nothing to contribute to a thread on the collective and systematic human rights abuse of women in Afghanistan, I suggest you move on to a different thread.

Lalgarh · 08/01/2025 13:11

HappyPanda613 · 08/01/2025 13:05

Are you a British man by any chance? Why downplay it? Have you seen the likes of Jimmy Saville in any other country? I know I haven’t.

This is the sort of whatabouttery that always ends up derailing threads, BC some ppl feel very uncomfortable focusing on stuff happening somewhere.

"Have you seen the likes of Jonny Savile elsewhere?" Well yes, there are. There are dozens. Dominic Pelicot in France . Endemic rape of boys in Afghanistan as Baccha Baazi. Thailand and Manila and an entire industry that has grown up providing child exploitation.

themostspecialelfintheworkshop · 08/01/2025 13:57

Nanny0gg · 08/01/2025 12:49

For those of you still on Twitter, please read: https://x.com/JeanHatchet/status/1876546225488441559

A letter to the ECB from the writer Jean Hatchet.

I'd have copied and pasted here but it's long.

And it's spot on!

Brilliant letter, well done Jean! The rage and contempt just pours off the page. 100% agree with every word.

I'm not on twitter but I could read it.

Also answered my question - sadly the match is in Lahore so can't get there to protest. Is there any accessible ecb headquarters we can demonstrate outside with huge COMPLICIT and SHAME signs?

Fizbosshoes · 08/01/2025 14:08

Adisgracetotheforcesofevil · 08/01/2025 10:42

I don't think they view women as humans. I've seen quite a few videos of fanatical clerics saying women are no better than goats. Imagine receiving that message as a small girl, constantly being told you are inferior.

Women "don't deserve to drive because they only have a quarter of a brain".
Women only have half a brain to begin with but when they go out shopping they "end up with only a quarter" claimed Sheikh Saad Al-Hijri.

Imagine being a little boy and your only experience of women is seeing your mother covered head to toe, not allowed to leave the house, being a servant to your abusive father, getting beaten if she doesn't obey, having a baby every year. The socialisation they receive and how that changes their psychology is practically irreversible and so the never ending cycle of abuse continues.

But how can it be broken without foreign intervention and is it our responsibility to do so? We all knew women would suffer when the Taliban took control.

I understand the brainwashing of children to believe this is "normal" ....to a point....but what about the (recent) time when the Taliban weren't in power. The west had influence over Afghanistan for 20 years. What about kids born during that time who witnessed their mothers, sisters, grandmother's, Aunts having had jobs, education, freedom only for it to be taken away...?

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 08/01/2025 14:24

Tweeteroo · 08/01/2025 13:11

I think you're on a wind up. If you have nothing to contribute to a thread on the collective and systematic human rights abuse of women in Afghanistan, I suggest you move on to a different thread.

This poster is on another thread saying we should stop talking about the rape gangs in Rotherham and other towns.

Regarding the cricket, Afghanistan shouldn't even be in the tournament. To be a full member of the ICC, which they are, each country must have and support a women's cricket team which Afghanistan clearly don't. I believe all countries should boycott their matches with them but it needs to go higher than that and the ICC (and other sporting bodies) need to take a stand. They did it during apartheid in South Africa and elections in Zimbabwe so they've proved they can.

SquirrelSoShiny · 08/01/2025 14:24

Fizbosshoes · 08/01/2025 14:08

I understand the brainwashing of children to believe this is "normal" ....to a point....but what about the (recent) time when the Taliban weren't in power. The west had influence over Afghanistan for 20 years. What about kids born during that time who witnessed their mothers, sisters, grandmother's, Aunts having had jobs, education, freedom only for it to be taken away...?

I'm actually astonished that there haven't been mass suicides by women in Afghanistan. I can't fathom the horror of seeing a different way of life only to have it taken away. But, women endure.

Excellent letter by Jean Hatchet thank you for sharing.

Callmejudith · 08/01/2025 14:52

BrokenHipster · 08/01/2025 12:00

Did you know that Afghani women are not named in their childrens birth certificates? Only the father and paternal grandfather are named.

Did you know that women aren't always even given names? And when they are, they aren't even used. They are referred to as wife of husband's name, and mother of sons name. Their graves are unmarked.

I had no idea - that is horrific

coxesorangepippin · 08/01/2025 14:53

British men have their faults... But it ain't Afghanistan

coxesorangepippin · 08/01/2025 14:55

Women only have half a brain to begin with but when they go out shopping they "end up with only a quarter" claimed Sheikh Saad Al-Hijri.

^

A man clearly heavily invested in the anatomy of the female brain

Floralnomad · 08/01/2025 15:00

I’ve been saying for years that Afghanistan should not be allowed to play in the cricket tournaments . The ECB s answer is it needs the whole ICC and frankly the ICCs main influence ( whether they admit it or not ) is the ICB ( Indian cricket board) . So if people want to write letters they’d be better off sending them to the ICB as they hold the sway .

lljkk · 08/01/2025 15:07

As bad as Afghan women have it, I think sexual violence towards women may be a lot worse in some other countries, DRC esp.

dynamiccactus · 08/01/2025 16:06

HappyPanda613 · 08/01/2025 13:05

Are you a British man by any chance? Why downplay it? Have you seen the likes of Jimmy Saville in any other country? I know I haven’t.

That guy in France who got 70 odd other men to rape his wife?

There's male violence and sexual violence in every country. But at least in the western world something is sometimes/often done about it.

How you can even begin to compare the UK with Afghanistan is somewhat beyond me. Of course it's not perfect but I can be educated, work, travel, undertake leisure pursuits without some regime telling me I can't. And I have access to contraception.

dynamiccactus · 08/01/2025 16:08

lljkk · 08/01/2025 15:07

As bad as Afghan women have it, I think sexual violence towards women may be a lot worse in some other countries, DRC esp.

That could be the case simply because Afghan women aren't allowed outside and if a man does do something (witnessed by however many people the regime requires) it's the death penalty.

Not much consolation though.

On Syria, I also fear that the new regime will introduce restrictions. Probably not as bad as Afghanistan or Iran, but restrictive enough. Even under the previous regime there were restrictions on the work women could do.

Worldgonecrazy · 08/01/2025 16:22

There is an organisation called SOLA which helps educate a small number of Afghan girls who they have managed to get out of the country. Unfortunately these girls are unable to have a normal life due to the threats to them and their family if discovered. Heartbreaking, but does show some Afghan men consider their daughters to be intelligent and human.

Nanny0gg · 08/01/2025 21:26

Callmejudith · 08/01/2025 14:52

I had no idea - that is horrific

So on all levels, they don't exist...😥😡

MushMonster · 08/01/2025 21:28

This of the names the graves and the birth certificate has really shocked me.
I cannot imagine a reality like this.

freshstartsjessy · 08/01/2025 21:34

Does everyone who agrees with how terrible Afghanistan is also welcome Afghan refugees?

Porcuporpoise · 08/01/2025 21:36

HappyPanda613 · 08/01/2025 13:05

Are you a British man by any chance? Why downplay it? Have you seen the likes of Jimmy Saville in any other country? I know I haven’t.

You don't need to be a man to think that the misogyny women face in the UK cannot be compared to that faced by women in Afghanistan. And abuses like those committed by Jimmy Saville happen just about everywhere, if you've only heard of this in the UK you might want to think why that is.

Judellie · 08/01/2025 22:10

Afghanistan is so bad for women it makes North Korea look like a good place to be!

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