Double ear piercing - fine at 13?

[YouBelongWithMe]

Our youngest wants to get second piercings in her lobes. She's paying for it herself and she knows from the first lot what the aftercare involves. It's at a very reputable piercing establishment which uses needles not guns.

My mum says it's grossly irresponsible to let a 13yr old double pierce her ears. I'm of the opinion that it's not such a big deal, many have them, they can close up if she changes her mind.

AIBU to be so casual about second ear piercings?

I've got 4 in each, my nose pierced both sides, belly button done, I love it all but I'm an adult. I did start at 12 though ! I say let her, it's fashionable now and as long as she looks after them I don't see the issue. I think it's self expression !

Ear piercings are fine. I’d be more worried if she was asking for her nose or belly!

Is she's responsible enough to look after them properly, and has asked permission to get them done professionally rather than with a heated needle at home then it suggests she's sensible.

By allowing it, you're showing that you trust her and recognise her bodily autonomy.

It's just a cosmetic thing.

Just check her school allows them.

My argument was if you have all these things now at a young age, what do you have to look forward to?

Tattoos and hair dye 😁

I got my lobes pierced at 16 and then let them close up when I was around 18. Reopened them at 21, now have 3 in each lobe (stretched those first ones to 8mm as the original piercing was wonky due to it being done with a gun), 2 in right cartilage and an industrial in my left ear.

Why not enjoy things when they're young. Plenty of other bits to get pierced when she is older if she fancies 😆

DD had her seconds done at 14, by 17 she has a total of 9. It’s not something I can get excited about, she’s not a baby, and if she changes her mind she can take them out. It’s not like having your eyeballs tattooed. She got the same drivelly reaction from my mum, it’s irrelevant.

My DD is 12 and had her nose pierced for her birthday. She really knew what she wanted, was mature about it, sat wonderfully and did all the aftercare herself. I'm happy, so is she. Can't tell you the amount of shit we've had from school about it though 🙄

Yeah it would be fine for me. One of my teenagers got it done at 13 while the other waited till 15 but I was fine either way as it was just ears. Right now, my 16 year old is trying to convince me to let her get a belly piercing but I am not sure!

Of course it's fine. Better than girls at my school who were getting their belly buttons done at 12!

Why?

I got my first in year 4 and my second when going up to secondary school. Never got any more piercings after that. I think as long as she knows how to and is responsible enough to take care of them, it’s fine.

Out of interest how come ?

Because I don't think a belly button piercing is suitable for a 12 year old child.

Yeah it’s only earlobes it’s not a big deal.

I let my eldest get her nose pierced at 13, not because I’m a “cool mum” or anything. I just can’t get worked up about a tiny hole, and she can take it out if she decides she doesn’t like it anymore. I do have a lot of piercings and tattoos myself so it’s probably why I’m not that bothered about my kids getting them.

"Suitable" ? 🙄
There's no logic. It's a tiny hole whether it's an ear, nose or belly button.

I wouldn't have an issue but probably save it for the summer holidays as some high schools have rules about earrings

Not every opinion has to be logical. I'm not banning belly button piercings on 12yo's - I just don't agree with them 🤷‍♀️

At 13 if it’s her choice then I think it’s fine. Remember you can take lobe earrings out and no one would know whether you have them pierced. Other things like tattoos and piercing on lips or eyebrows are permanent marks on the body.

In a school I used to work at, there was someone who had it done in year 6. She was the youngest person I've ever met with two sets of holes, and I found it a bit surprising, but nobody else commented and she certainly didn't get told off. Like people with one pair, she had to cover them up with tape for PE, that's all. She had very short hair at the time too - if she'd later decided she didn't want one or both sets of piercings, she could have grown her hair a bit longer and nobody would have been any the wiser.

It sounds as if your mum thinks she's going to pierce them herself - which may have been the only way some people of her generation could get it done, but if you reassure her with the facts you've given us about how safe and reputable the piercer is, maybe she'll be more understanding.

I had my second one done aged 13 without my mum knowing. I still wear earrings in it. I'm 56 now. It's no big deal. Let her if school are ok with it

Yes, absolutely fine and not controversial at all.l, just a bit of sparkle and a presentation detail.

Get the first pair done and fully healed so they can be taken out and then get the second lobe pair done. Your child can comply with school rules of one earring in each ear doing it this way. Takes longer obviously but no risk of being told to take one pair out when healing is not complete - be very difficult for example to return earring to a hole only pierced a few weeks😃

My child had lobes pierced in year 7 and again in the summer before year 9.

I had double ear piercings in mid to late 90s - my mum didn't like it but wasn't outraged by it either.

Absolutely fine, I think I had my second ear piercing done at 14 and that was years ago. School may ask for one pair to be removed though.

My 13 yo dd has no piercings because she doesn't want them. I had a second set done while attending a school who had a "one set of studs only" policy. I had the second set considerably after the first so just used the back set for school. The piercer did one second hole far to close to the first and it looks wonky. I've no idea how to avoid that but it isn't an age problem! I think I'd just ignore Gran's take on this issue.

Let her do it, they can be taken out

Because it looks shit