Leave 6 year old at home with 13 year old

[PrettyPleaseXo]

AIBU
I really want to start the gym
I'm a single parent with no childcare who works full time so the only time I could feasibly go is early in the mornings when the kids are in bed. Would it be unreasonable to leave the kids sleeping with a 13 year old and 6 year old?
I would be gone for roughly 1.5hrs

No, a 13 year old shouldn't have that responsibility forced upon them. If anything went wrong, it could be devastating for him.

Too much responsibility for 13 year old at that time of the morning. Fine to leave them, if 13 year old is sensible ad trustworthy, for a quick half hour appointment if you had something you needed to do at a reasonable time of day.
I would be too worried to enjoy the gym!

The 13yo would be fine, but not with the 6yo.
Sorry. I have similar aged kids and think they'd end up fighting or being horrible to each other. Your two might be different though.

I also think 90mins at that time in the morning is a long time, I assume your thinking 15min there, hour in gym, 15min back.

No, have a jog or do a youtube on your lunch.

You can go downstairs and do a home workout video or your garden or garage to woekout.

90min is ages. I wouldn’t. But I might do a 25min run in a loop round nearby streets. With my phone and leaving them a phone.

I just read it'd be at 5:30am so it's definitely sensible not to go. 5:30 is much too early and obviously the 13 year old needs sleep and leaving them alone sleeping is too dangerous. I hope you can figure out other ways like Youtube workouts

I do this and it's fine, both sensible kids and my phone is on. They usually watch tv together but the oldest could make cereal if needed as in your case. In the 90s it was common for 13 yo to babysit 2 or 3 younger kids as paid babysitters and they didn't even gave mobile phones.

I think it's fine for half an hour, maybe 45 minutes, but an hour and a half is too long. If you aren't exercising regularly at the moment, it also seems an unnecessarily large amount of time to devote to exercise. Why don't you go for a 30 minute walk/ jog / run (depending on fitness) for cardio, and then do 15 mins of balance and strength training (yoga, arm weights etc.) once you're back?

How far away will you be?

My Gym is a 7 minute walk and 5 min if I ran. In an emergency, I could be home within 5 minutes. I did leave my 4 year old with my 10 year old once for 2 hours once but I had told my DD (10) of it the night before and also put on my nanny cam (really cheap on Amazon). Put breakfast on table/juice in fridge etc.

I don’t think it would be an issue. It’s likely they won’t even be awake when you get home. Just make sure you are nearby and have the cam set up.

I would say if the following are true then go ahead:

Gym is close by
Set up nanny cam
Mature 13 year old (knows how to exit, call emergency etc)
Play well together

I could even talk to them with the nanny cam.
Chances are they won’t even be awake when you get home. I use to go gym at 6.30am and when I returned at 7.30 I had to wake kids/Hubby to get ready for school/work.

I wouldn’t have left my younger one with his older brother at those ages mainly because the y both have ADHD and could be unpredictable but I used to babysit for neighbours kids at 13.

I think it's fine, as long as the 13 year old is okay with it?

My friend's DD is 13 and mature enough to look after her 5 year old DS, but I agree with others that I'd do it only when 13 year old is awake.

Could you join a gym near to work to go to on your lunch break maybe? I know it's not the same, but if childcare is difficult, there are some great home workouts (if you have the motivation) you could do in the morning before work, or after the kids go to sleep. This is my plan for the new year, as it's so difficult to find time where I'm childfree for the gym, but could fit it in after bedtime for 30 mins in the living room.

If that's your life five days a week or even 4 I salute you for trying to go to the gym at all, but wouldn't it be easier to fit in a quick run a few times a week, be out of the house for less time and maybe get them involved in a park run at the weekend?

You're not unreasonable to leave them at home, but adding an hour and a half onto a long work day sounds very long

Go on the weekends when they are both awake? I would leave them if the 13yo was sensible and the 6yo was good. I was left at 11 with my 9yo sister, we were very sensible and close with our neighbour who was in next door.

Op i know it's not cheap but if you have a David Lloyd near you they do have kids clubs for your youngest. That would give you time to exercise when they are entertained.

Another thought is going for a run when he's in any other clubs he does, instead of going back to the house go for a walk or run.

I used to, when my kids were similar ages. It's fine if the 13yo is sensible and the younger one will listen to them. I don't think it makes any difference whether the 13yo is awake either. A mature 13yo is as competent as an adult, and just as capable of coming to their senses quickly in an emergency such as a house fire. When I was that age, I used to have a kip sometimes while babysitting late at night. The parents were fine with it.

Obviously they both need to know that you're out, so tell/remind them the night before.

It depends a lot on the children.

I think there's a middle ground though - it doesn't need to be 1.5 hours starting at 5.30. How about going for a 40 min run at 6.20 instead? Then once it's summer, it's lighter, they are both a bit older and they are used to you being out for a bit, think about a longer session.

It's fine and I am really shocked by some of responses

I used to babysit other people’s children at 13 and definitely watched my younger brother at that age. Unless they are specifically irresponsible this seems fine?

I think on principle it’s completely fine to leave a 6-year-old with a 13-year-old. I routinely looked after my younger siblings around 2005 from when I was 10, and they were 7 and 6. By 13 I was babysitting for other families, up to three kids at a time.

THAT SAID, I would consider gym time in the evening rather than the morning, so that the 13 year old is awake and truly in charge. I wouldn’t feel comfortable leaving a 6-year-old basically unsupervised assuming they woke up before their sibling

Even in the US 13 year olds are often asked to babysit - it's in the UK that we're strangely obsessed with not leaving teenagers in charge of siblings.
However, you're right the crucial bit here is them being awake.

Of course not!! Jeesh! 🤯😤