It was you

[Margauxdes]

Have you ever read a thread on mumsnet and realised that the person was talking or complaining about you?

What are you talking about?? People do this all the time!!! There are regular posts on threads from people who have done exactly this - have advanced searched the OP and are now spewing details from previous threads by the OP into the latest thread.

Well, that was creepy and weird of you.

So why be pompous and proclaim "name change for this"? It makes no sense. Just name change and crack on as if a newbie

I think its to try to ward off idiots who post 'Interesting first post OP' (which is a way of accusing OP of being a troll.).

No, but I did post something once about a local thing that I find really annoying (and named the area); and someone I know talked to me in real life like they’d read it. They didn’t know it was me who posted it, but they were defensive over this issue and I was sure she’d read the thread!

Yes but it wasn't bitching, it was a nice feel good one that is somewhere in Classics ♥️

No, BUT I did see a post on here recently that I recognised was posted by my friend because she posted almost word for word the same thing on Facebook. That was a real surprise.

Name change regularly to keep anonymity but don’t announce every time I do it.

also sometimes deliberately change details to ensure anonymity.

e.g I have a boy and a girl (or do I?????? ) but sometimes will change their genders or ages etc

probably bring a bit paranoid but some aspects of our lives I think could be potentially easily identifiable if you pieced too many posts together:

I am very good at research - if I knew your name was ‘Henry’ I wouldn’t find you online - but I only need a few extra details such as you are in your 20’s, have 2 boys, live in Birmingham, enjoy playing darts are a plumber and believe me - it’s really not hard to track people down with a bit of patience and lateral thinking on the internet especially if you are on social media.

if you post a lot on Mumsnet you could make yourself very identifiable - so I think regular name changing is a good thing!

Off to do it now after this post

About six months ago I saw a thread from a woman who was asking if she had been unreasonable about a neighbourly dispute. I recognised the incident as I’m friends with one of her neighbours and she had left bits out to make her look better. When I challenged her on this she had the thread deleted and mumsnet’s deletion message said the thread had been deleted because she’d been recognised in real life.

i never understand why someone would start a thread and miss out the bits that make them look bad - surely they must know on some level they’re unreasonable.

I did that once, didn't think it through. Thankfully I hadn't posted much witht that user name, and name changed again pdq!

Some of you will have heard of the Aston University data scrape, earlier this year. They would very much have been able to identify users here, a huge GDPR scandal.

Several of us did it, and the only reason was that the OP had set it as a challenge because she wanted to see how identifiable she was.

As far as I remember, quite a few people came up with the basic info about names, town, school etc, & it served to show the OP she was a lot less anonymous than she thought.

I’m not anonymous at all to anyone who knows me, they’d recognise me instantly from my username & cat threads, but I’m fine with that.

I do this - history and details blurred / changed - occasionally someone goes through my posts and accuses me of being a total fantasist. Nope. Just covering my ass…

It's common sense, nothing to do with self-importance.

Because of the "million" of users a months, it is likely there will be 1 or 2, or more, local from you.
Tell a story about your school, office, club, church... people from that setting will likely recognise the incident. They then name-search to find more details and knowing you have x breed of dog, or such car, or an unusual allergy or anything and they will know who you are.

Never but I've seen posters comment about them being outed in real life due to their MN posts

I once read a post on here complaining about a ridiculous restriction being imposed on people accessing an extremely important public service, due to the needs of a member of staff.

That reminded me of someone at my previous place of work who had insisted on similar unreasonable restrictions being imposed on people in the workplace. They later left the job.

I searched the poster who m0ade the original post and found that they were not a million miles away from me. Therefore I have suspected that the "unreasonable restriction insister" they were complaining about is probably the same person i worked with.

But that's as far as I have gone.

No, you’re right I have seen that. That’s not the norm though, I hope!

You’re right, I have seen that. I’ve seen it and enjoyed the fruits of their labour!

of course people care enough to advance-search.

People care enough to advance-search complete strangers and blurt on a thread "but you said THIS and THAT on that other thread, and you lied about this on that other one"

When often it's just a poster changing bits of info that are fairly irrelevant in order to stay anonymous (say they have a boy instead of a girl, a cat instead of a dog..)

Some people are VERY invested on this forum. Someone was even claiming to make a LIST of the people they didn't like on here 😂

No. If I did think that I'd leave the site permanently! It would be one hell of a coincidence, and it would be difficult to prove it was definitely about you.
What about if you posted and someone IRL recognised you and called you out? That would also be deeply embarrassing. But I'd deny it fully. 🤣

I once found a school mum friend on here, the thread she started was about a very specific issue at school that I was aware of so it was easy to spot. She had posted about her kids names a decade previously so advance search proved it was her. She’s a lovely lovely lady and she was taken apart on here 😞😞

I've twice had that.

I've also identified someone who was talking about a local school. They put something that was very identifiable if you knew them.

If I'm posting about something where someone could be identified, then I change enough details (eg friend becomes a cousin etc) so if someone thought they'd identified themselves and me then I suspect they'd be wrong.

Ahh yes, I have seen this!

Not quite the same but someone posted advice on one of my own threads in a niche forum where I'd NC'd, then they posted quoting my post on another thread where I'd posted under another username because that was someone else's thread about the small village where I live. And I realised I knew them from the same hobby and I've narrowed it down to two people. 😬

Never about me but a couple of times I have been 95% sure I know who it was.

Some stories are very vague but some are very specific.

I can imagine that happens quite a lot. You only ever get one side of a story on here.