To think it’s weird that we try and keep the ‘magic’ alive for teen and adult children.

[Trimbleton]

I mean they know Santa isn’t real so why do I feel the pressure to still do ‘Santa’ and mince pies for Santa etc. The pressure to have a ‘magical’ Christmas is fine when they are younger but why when DC grow up are we still expected to keep it alive ?

I find it all quite mad and wonder if it’s more about the constant infantilisation of our DC - we don’t want them to grow up

Seriously, OP - you're overthinking this!

Merry Christmas 😀

We don’t do it for the (adult) children, we do it for me. I love Christmas.

I don't? It's a massive bloody relief not to have to do any of that now mine are older. Still do stockings. Presents go under the tree whenever. They'll get up about 10am. Much more relaxed

I love it, it's fun mines early 20's.

My mum made our Xmas amazing and now she's no longer here I fully intend to keep it going xxx

I crept down when everyone was in bed to put out presents. It's part of the fun

I'm 45, my mother is 75, my sister is 40.

Last night was the first Christmas Eve in 18 years where DS(18) hasn’t been home. I have to admit to being a little lost 🥹😆 He came home at 5am (10 years ago he’d have been up opening presents at that time), so he won’t be up until midday I imagine.

We haven’t done the carrot, mince pie etc for years though, and never got into the Christmas Eve boxes or Elf on a bloody shelf but still, it’s lovely having a little magic still there, so I do still hang up a stocking for him 🎄😆

It's part of the fun for us that DD tries to catch me out doing Santa things, and I have to be creative and not get caught out!

We enjoy it, but if you don't then there's no need to join in. Do Christmas in a way you and your family enjoy, and let others do it the way they enjoy.

I spent last night stuffing oddly named beer and snacks in 6ft 4 23 year old built like a brick shit house DS stocking and will continue to do so till I slip off this mortal coil. Last year when he had a GF I did one for her and she was delighted as her family didn’t ever do them.

I didn't do all the Santa stuff when they were teens. Who expected you to keep it alive?

We've never really done that because we didn't ever do santa either. I do feel each to their own, but also think it's a tad odd to leave food out for no reason.

My DC now adults stopped believing in Santa at 7 and 8
We have just developed new traditions involving escape room or board games on Xmas Eve with cocktails
Lego in the lead up to Xmas
Karaoke and house party at DDs Xmas day night etc

for some people family traditions are very important. We left out a mince pie and a cup with a teabag in for DH who left at 5am to go to work. He appreciated that, and in return left stockings outside our bedroom doors.

Each family/person is different. So why, as they say in internet land, yuk someone's yum?

ETA: having said that (we now include DC1s boyfriend in the stockings) we never ever pretended the gifts were from anyone other than the gift giver and Father Christmas only stored and delivered them. Kind of like a benevolent jolly Jef Bezos. I have also left my mum a stocking and she will be delighted at the silly contents. Including the by now traditional Freddo that we all get instead of an overpriced Lindt thing.

Replace 'magic' with 'lies' and ask yourself that.

I have the youngest adult children in that they are 19 and 18. Elf on the shelf American wasn't a thing here unless you were stupid enough to do it! In which case they will be the type to keep doing it forever.

I don't know anybody who still does that kind of stuff once their kids know Santa isn't real.

YANBU. The only time teenagers and adults in my family talked about Santa and Christmas magic was for the benefit of children young enough to still believe in it - and part of the Santa story is that he brings presents for children, not everyone! The teenagers naturally aged out of it.

As an adult I'd find it really weird and condescending if one of my parents spoke to me as if Santa were real. We still enjoy Christmas and buy each other presents.

This is so lovely! 🥰

And maybe your parents do things for you that other people find 'weird and condescending', but for your family is just a way your parents express love.

It seems fairly harmless, in itself.

Because it’s nostalgic and gives people a sense of togetherness.

having said that (we now include DC1s boyfriend in the stockings) we never ever pretended the gifts were from anyone other than the gift giver and Father Christmas only stored and delivered them. Kind of like a benevolent jolly Jef Bezos

Same in my family growing up and with my DD.

Recipients are left in no doubt who paid for the gifts that Santa brought!

Our daughters are in their twenties, living in their own house and running their own lives. They're back here for Christmas, and we still do Santa stockings at the end of the bed. They like it. We like doing it. Also, I read them The Night Before Christmas before they go to sleep. At about two in the morning.

It's a tradition, and, yes, absolutely absurd, and very easy to ridicule.

But it makes everyone involved happy. So why not?

In our family all the presents from parents are from "Santa" (and grown ups get stockings too....) is this sacrilege??

Genuinely agog that people who know Santa isn’t real are still leaving mince pies out. Mince pies for who?!!

We do stockings in our family at all ages but they’re not something anyone thinks or pretends is from Santa, they’re just a fun vehicle to gift some smaller bits.

Shocking! How dare you celebrate Christmas in the way that is meaningful for your family, if it isn't meaningful for random strangers on the Internet? 😂

While I still lived at home, into early adulthood, my brother and I would leave something out for Santa that we knew our parents would enjoy! We'd stick a carrot there for fun and it was always nibbled in the morning!