To think people are becoming ruder...?

[BlackBean2023]

I took the kids out for an afternoon tea at a garden centre yesterday and there was a group of women - one with two children- at the next table. The oldest child was about three and spent most of the time sitting on the floor leaning against my chair (and coat) on her iPad. The youngest looked about 18 months and threw most of their food on the floor which the mum just left there.

I went to do the food shopping and it was carnage. People with multiple trolleys pushing into the smallest of spaces rather than parking their trolley up to the side and taking a couple of steps to the shelves.

Popped into the Co-op on way home to pick up forgotten items and there's a bloke in the queue moaning loudly about having to wait 5 minutes to be served.

I am due to meet a friend for a coffee this morning and I genuinely don't want to have to mix with people after yesterday's interactions!

It makes sense to me. That person I barge past to grab the last toilet roll is probably someone I'd never have any contact with again. It's very different if you live a lifestyle where everyone does communal crop harvesting or field plowing or whatever equivalent. You're not going to want to piss your neighbours off then.

I work on the premise that the person I don't barge past has had an awful day and a small smile, or a bit of patience, could be difference to them having a slightly better day.

The Be Kind movement only seems to apply after some form of celebrity tragedy.

That's appalling. And calling you big ffs! She's lucky it wasn't me.

So you're saying it's ok?

This 100%. Also living in the era of no shame or embarrassment, ‘main character syndrome’ and serious delusions of who people think they are due to social media

No and I don't really behave like that myself but I can see how it's easier to rationalize that sort of thing in a more anonymous world.

I live in an old mining village. Apart from a select few the people are much nicer to each other than in towns/cities. We have lots that have moved here from the south and they love it. Some were forced some chose to and bought the cheap houses.

Worked in retail over the years, but it’s much worse now...
Saw a man simply point to the item he wanted, yesterday.

Not sure but this time of year more people are going out than normally; so their bad behaviour is more noticeable.

Ok just from your post sounded like you agreed. That's good.

My adult dss and adult dsd have fantastic manners. As do dgcs. They've been brought up that way.

At Halloween, all the dc who came to my door were polite. A lot weren't prompted.

i was in Aldi yesterday. A man was letting his daughter do cartwheels down all the aisle. At Christmas time. People were trying to get out the way. I hate people.

This is why I never go to the cinema any more! People have ruined it.

The last time I went was to see the Baz Luhrman Elvis biopic and someone brought a baby with them. A BABY! It ended up wailing/screaming and the mum had to leave after 45 mins after about 20 mins of trying to pacify it. Everyone was so pissed off.

I dont know WTF is wrong with people. I get babies are hard (I've had two) but what on earth is the point of bringing them to the cinema? just watch it on netflix at home once its out FFS.

Now I will only watch films at home - much more comfortable and less annoying.

I think some people spent too much time on their own during the Covid lockdowns and they have forgotten how to behave in public. There’s also a massive sense of self entitlement among some people.

My 81 year old mother was travelling on a train recently and a kid (with their parent) had their feet / shoes on the seat. My mother (who is always very polite) asked the parent to ask their child to take the shoes off the seat. They responded rudely and said they wouldn’t as it would upset the child.

I was on a train recently and a girl got in next to me and started watching videos on loud speaker (this absolutely boils my piss). I very politely asked her if she could pop some earphones in. She told me I was weird. Not weird I responded, just well mannered and not self entitled.

I’m just back from Japan where everyone is so polite and considerate. This country has gone to shit.

Yes they are and it started during COVID. This constant focus on themselves and attention seeking does my head in.

We were out for lunch a couple Sundays ago and this bloke banged on about his trip to Australia so loudly and in such day by day detail that he didn't let his companions joined in. It was so stressful we left without desert.

And all the shouting into phones about inappropriate things. I do not want to know who has diarrhea in your house.

Everyone wants everyone to know everything about them. I don't. I'm not interested.

Because people only think about themselves. I see it all the time including posts on here. The attitude is self centered that you have to be okay first, then people need to understand your feelings, then they have to do what makes you happy and then maybe you will think about them.

Look on any post here and you will see it.

There is very little thought of others, or putting yourself out or making others happy and perhaps slight inconvenience to you.

It is really disappointing.

Or how about this one. Someone is doing something inconsiderate- let’s say having a bag on a seat on a packed train. You politely ask them to move their bag so you can sit down and instead of saying ‘oh yeah sure no problem”, you get a tirade of abuse because you dared ask someone to do something. People cannot these days ever admit they are wrong and react aggressively if you dare tell them as such.

And then all poor behaviour gets a “they might be neurodiverse, or have mental health issues or excuse excuse excuse”.

and then all poor behaviour gets a “they might be neurodiverse, or have mental health issues or excuse excuse excuse”

Urgh yes. Someone acts like an utter arsehole and everyone says "be kind- they might have dementia"- even when the person is like, 50.

Or, "be kind- they might be neurodiverse" - I am ND and I find this really offensive that these labels get slapped on people when they behave rudely as if anyone who is rude must be ND

Sometimes people just suck- and there is no "excuse".

I work with adults with learning difficulties and they all have manners. Even when I've worked with non verbal only the extremely disabled didn't say thank you by signing or showing thanks in some way. There's no excuse.

@Cadburyscreamegg
The customer may supposed to be always right but there is no excuse to be rude to people working in retail.
I make a point of saying hello and thank you, because that's what is polite.
The way some people of my age and all ages speak to staff makes me cringe.
I wouldn't dream of being on my phone, either- if it was an urgent call I'd step out of the queue to answer.

I am actually fat, but wasn't sure if it was a dig at my size or if she just meant "grown up" 🤣

She's lucky we were in the cinema - if I'd not been trying not to carry it on and avoid disturbing everyone else even more, she'd have regretted that!

Yes. I got the train home yesterday and on just my carriage there was a grown man in his 40s playing YouTube videos out loud on his lap top. Then two chavvy girls shouting and drinking and playing TikTok videos out loud. They left a mess too. The family behind had tablet things playing Peppa Pig and games out loud for small children, none of whom had an inside voice, and they also left a mess. The laptop man also smelled of BO. People just don't behave appropriately in public any more.

Yes, we want to the cinema yesterday and had the misfortune of sitting in front of a man and his son. The child kept talking a normal volume throughout the film and at no point did his dad tell him to be quiet.

@MaryYellann nah reckon it was a dig. Apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Those dcs have no hope.

I'm terrified of being jostled in a crowd or even knocked over. I can't really go anywhere busy at all. If you use a walking aid or wheelchair then at least it gives you a little bit more personal space and people visualise you as being disabled. Not that I'm wishing myself to require such equipment. But when they can't see the disability I get scared as if I were to fall I'd almost certainly suffer at least one fracture injury.