No elbows on the table rule is arbitrary and not relevant in 2024

[ShortWide]

I was taught not to put my elbows on the table when eating, but I have decided that as long as I don’t encroach on my fellow diners’ space, this is not a problem. Not sure what everyone else thinks though! I could definitely be persuaded to change my mind on this if the majority of people would be horrified by this lack of manners.

YABU - you should never have elbows on the table

YANBU - elbows on the table is no big deal these days

Ha, I'm in Australia! Must be in different circles - mine are often found to be talking with their mouth full so a hand over the mouth would be a pleasant addition 😂

YANBU
Where else would you put them?

Yes, come to think of it, that's my understanding of the rule, and it's what I observe and have taught my DCs.

Only something my physiotherapist worries about.
To routinely sit up and support one's back without having elbows on the table is better for muscle strength and posture that supports the back. Helps with headaches.

Slovenly diners are not really noticed, particularly when they are good company.

Americans generally eat with the fork in their right hand, not left. They tend to just use the side of the fork to cut their food or if they do use a knife they switch it into their right hand then put it down when finished using. It is annoying

When eating I think it's slovenly and rude. Balancing wrists and lower forearms on the side of the table is fine, as that allows for gesticulation, but elbows are a definite no for me.

I have a friend whose posture is so awful when eating I refuse to sit next to her; she spreads out her elbows and hunches over her plate. Her overbearing physical presence at the table cuts you off from conversation if you're unfortunate enough to be cornered by her.

When you're not eating it's fine as long as your elbows are kept neat and back straight.

DH occasionally rests his forearms on the table whilst eating (I mean everything but his elbows) and I tell him off gently for pushing boundaries, as do my DDs: "You're pushing boundaries, Daddy!".

“Take your hat off when you eat people”

I wasn’t aware cannabalism had specific etiquette.

Gentlemen should remove hats inside let alone at a table
I think good manners and table manners are a good thing

Hats at the table is the same as coats !

Maybe, still get invites though so it can’t bother them that much!

I’ve seen posts referring to elbows on table with cutlery in hands. That’s not what I mean! I’m not shovelling food in, elbows up and head down, like a cartoon character.

Yes exactly this. If you can make up whichever manners suit you and it is all purely down to personal taste and subjective opinion, then where do you draw a line and where does it end? Extrapolate that to society more broadly, where acceptable standards in terms of morality and values and right conduct are out the window and its the land of do whatever you like all the time and we're living under the tyranny of relativism. It's the last days of Rome. We have passed the peak of our civilisation and its going to be a long decline back to barbarism.

Not in my immediate friendship groups but seems to be a thing amongst younger friends and relatives, although I have one friend in her 40s whose started doing it.