To cancel everything cos I'm burnt out?

[Balaclava1000]

I'm currently sick with a heavy cold and aches and pains and insomnia and I'm starting to panic that I've over committed myself for this week and next week and feel like cancelling everything. Would that be a bad idea and do you think I've been foolish for over booking myself? December has been pretty full on so far and I have one DD and we've already seen Santa, gone to a concert, xmas movies etc.

What's booked in:
-Tuesday to Thursday work in office

• Wednesday I have work secret santa and a playdate and then supposed to go to cinema for xmas movie with my partner
• Thursday i have my book group secret santa
• Friday I'm helping on the door for my friend's xmas concert and finishing xmas shopping
• Saturday I've to take my dd to cinema with her friend, then to a birthday party, then help out at my mum's xmas fayre, then meeting friends for our annual xmas lunch
• Sunday I've to meet my aunt and partner for lunch as won't see her over xmas
• Monday night booked in hotel
• Tuesday xmas eve cleaning wrapping presents etc
• xmas day at restaurant then sisters
• 26th a in laws
• 27th day off
• 28th concert in town
• 29th carnival with in laws kids
• 30th nothing
• 31st panto and meal

I actually feel sick and wonder if this level of activity is normal or if there is something wrong with me? Also what should I cancel bearing in mind I don't want to let people down. Also how do others avoid getting into such situations!?

Thanks for reading.

Op, I felt tired reading that schedule and I am fit and well

Cancel the non important ones not all and see how you go

😂 It is a lot of socialising, there’s no cooking Christmas dinner though or having to entertain guests, which must be nice not to do.

@Balaclava1000 you’re not feeling very well, really you should let your friends and relatives know, l don’t think they’ll thank you, if you pass on a cold or worse.

That schedule would be way to much for me. You don't need to do that much.

I'd call in sick to work a couple of times, cancel the playdate, cancel the book group and write a list for shopping and buy things in advance where possible so you just have to pick them up.

Once it's christmas you'll probably feel better and all the pressure is off. I really resist getting piled up with stuff to do at this time of year, it's just capitalism making us feel we have to spend our way out of panic and FOMO. Fuck it off.

Also you need to say no to more stuff if you don't feel up to it. I like movie dates. I don't mind the odd catch up but I find some people need to constantly be 'diarising' the next meal out or whatever and I do find it hectic and too much.... I am happy at home, it gets expensive and I don't like sitting for hours talking in a group environment.

I am about to duck out of a book related group because it's too much social activity for me, and have also turned down a group weekend away (against a fair bit of pressure) because... I don't want to.

Yes cancel some as they won’t thank you for passing on a heavy cold for Christmas. Rest now and hopefully you’ll be able to enjoy Christmas.

The Saturday definitely seems packed, the rest not so much. Is a cinema trip or hotel trip really something stressful? Seems on the face of it relaxing. But yeah it’s supposed to be fun so if it’s not feeling that way.. cancel?

not sure you’re ’burned out’ though, being ill with a cold virus is different

I don’t get into these situations because I know myself. Having too many social obligations would make me utterly miserable! Even if you love to fill your calendar, you are ill so you should definitely cancel.

If you’re sick, you’re sick and you can’t help that.

But I would be reluctant to cancel much, if anything as all of these things seem lovely and it’s a shame that you will miss out.

These are all things you wanted to do when you were feeling better and so I would just carry on and see how you feel.
If you need to cancel or not stay long etc then that’s absolutely fine.

Things like going to the cinema and hotel aren’t an issue and so I would remove these from your things you have to do list (still do them just don’t see them as chores).

Also don’t worry about anything that’s after Xmas as I’m sure you’ll feel much better physically and emotionally by then.

I would spend 30mins -1hour each evening wrapping and so you’re not feeling overwhelmed by the thought of doing it all.
If you’re not a single parent then DH can be wrapping too, especially when you’re out doing these activities.

Things like the secret Santa, I would go to but not stay long depending on how you feel.
If you really don’t want to, then just say you’re poorly and drop your present off for one of the others to take in with them.

Sounds like fun

I would cancel some of them but not the ones that would let people down. It’s fine not to want to do them but very short notice to cancel.

Have you already got the secret Santa gifts? Could you drop them off/ ask someone to take them so you don’t have to go yourself but you’re not letting anyone down.

Cancel Wednesdays play date and cinema as you’re not feeling well. Cancel Friday and Saturday apart from taking your DD to cinema/ birthday party (can someone else take her to the party?) Finish your Christmas shopping online.

Hopefully you will feel better from Sunday onwards, it’s not that busy then.

Also don’t leave all the wrapping until Christmas Eve, wrap a few a night.

That would be waaay too much for me. I'm quite a sociable person, but would be cancelling a lot in your shoes (or wouldn't have agreed to it in the first place!)

I would totally burn out with that schedule.

Wow I'd be exhausted as well. There was one year where I over committed myself and ended up poorly on Xmas day and boxing day. Never again! Take care of yourself

Oh my goodness that’s a lot of things. Definitely cancel all the things you can. Play dates, cinema visits, the night in a hotel (if you can get your money back) and lunch with friends can all be rearranged.

Cancel anything you can without really letting people down.

Sounds like you shouldn’t go to work today and have a day in bed. Xx

That’s way too much. And you shouldn’t be spreading your cold. Pull out of everything other than with immediate family you live with until Xmas Day.

This is a hell week for me too, and that’s just getting everything in the post and to give to people in time and work. If I had all those social events, I’d stop functioning.

So if you are going to work the secret Santa will presumably happen. Can you wrk from home? Plead illness?
Play date- drop off or attend? I'd do it if drop off. Cinema- no unless u feel u will enjoy it.
Thursday- cancel due to illness
Friday - see how you feel for helping out get dh to do shopping
Saturday- try to do unless cold is worse
Sunday -as Saturday
Monday- is it refundable? Do you want to go?
Second week see how you feel nearer time.

If you’re ill, your body needs rest, otherwise you’ll just get sicker. And if the cold is actually Covid, trying to push on through it would increase the chances of developing long Covid.

The fact that you have a bad cold gives you the perfect excuse to cancel at least some of this - because you’re ill and because you don’t want to pass it on to others and ruin their Christmas.

As things stand, you’re not going to enjoy any of the planned events. But if you cancel some of them, you might be able to enjoy the rest.

We are all different, but I would never have coped with all that even when I was younger and fitter.

I hope you’re able to take of yourself, do what’s right for you and your cold, and enjoy Christmas.

It also might help to just think one day at a time.

OP please cancel as much as possible and call in sick to work. If I was one of your colleagues, in your book group, or the parent of your child's friend, and you turned up with a stinking cold this close to Xmas I would be absolutely furious with you!

“I hope you’re able to take of yourself, do what’s right for you and your cold, and enjoy Christmas.”

Sorry, should read “take care of yourself”.

I'd cancel the next 3 days then see how you feel. (dh should understand re cinema, book club ditto (could you get someone to drop you gift in?), and assuming the playdate is for your child and not you 😅, either cancel or find someone else to drop her off. Or is it close enough to home it is minimal effort.
No one wants your stinking cold for Christmas, anyway you can wfh the rest if the week?
Tell your friend now re the helping on the door so they can find someone else. Finish your shopping online.
If you take it easy for a few days I expect you will feel much better by the weekend.

Im the same as you, also extremely busy, 7 days a week and it's been going on for bloody months. There's always something and it's exhausting. December is just ridiculous.

I've had enough and something needs to change in January.

I think it would be hard and not fair to cancel for this year unless you really aren't well enough . I do understand though as Last year I over committed and had events most of December . I was shattered and decided to take it easier this year and so far it's been manageable . One group of friends I persuaded to see in January rather than pre Christmas so we have something to look forward to as January is bleak . Same with a pantomime , already going Xmas eve so second pantomime invite is for jan .

Either call in sick or WFH, and cancel it land up until Saturday for now. Please rest so you feel better and please stay at home so you don’t pass the cold on.

Honestly, when you break it down it’s ok (ie some things are just in evening and how taxing is a work secret Santa?).
I fit lots in, have to be supremely organised (no way woukd I be leaving cleaning and wrapping to CE, I wrap daily as a buy).

but if you are poorly, that’s different.