I feel like l'm depressed and cannot enjoy life anymore due to teaching!? Do I just need to find the right school after 4 schools?

[Se12345]

Everything is evolving around teaching these days. I want to give quick background information so if anyone out there reads can give me some guidance and direction. I completed my ECT years in two different schools. After two maternity covers I finally took on my first permanent job at another area. I couldn't take it and resigned with a month's notice February of 2024. It was so bad, planning was taking weeks and weeks and data was too much, admin work was too much and kids were unbelievable. I have never had such complains that I had from those parents. After resigning l actually got a job offer at another school that got withdrawn because the headteacher at the current time decided to give me a bad reference even though she only ever observed me once and knew me for 4 months. After that I found myself in supply teaching. Which started of with couple daily supply then long term roles.

One of the schools were lovely and I should have stayed longer when they offered but no l decided I wanted move to another area to get pay increase (fringe to outer London). I'm about to leave to school l'm at now because they expect too much also, they asked me to stay but told me if I did choose to stay another 2 terms l'd have to step up and get more involved, I don't want to give that much time when l'm not permanent.
I've been on and off job searching since last Feb. Only ones I get invited to are the council roles. Like ehcp coordinator or inclusion officer and decided not to interview on all occasions. I read things that day that's it's not going to be any better than teaching and that it's more stressful.
I don't know what do to. I am literally looking at jobs every minute I get. I decide that l'm not going to teach no more.

Then next minute I think, the holidays, and the future when I have kids.

I am studying msc psychology at the moment part time But won't be able to do PHd anytime soon.

All I do in any moment I get. School toielt break, lunch break, after school. Before bed or before work is to search for jobs. The remote jobs never really get back to me. I am deeply and secretly depressed I think.

It sounds tough. Teaching isn't a good career to have alongside a family though, so if that's your motivation then I'd take it off the list! No other advice I'm afraid but hope you settle into something

Can you head back into supply? At least then you don't have the planning, data, parent issues.

Teaching is a terrible job if you want children.
You will still need childcare for the holidays as you'll be working a lot during them (based on what my teacher friends say)

What are you planning to do with the Psychology degree? Because if you were thinking of anything in the NHS it's not any better than education in terms of stress and workload.

It does sound as if teaching isn't for you. Leaving part way through the year is not great for the children. Have you tried seeking advice for the careers service of whichever universities you are studying/have studied with?

Have you looked into being a private tutor .I know someone who does this and they are very happy.

I'm leaving after 21 years in. Starting a job a a 1:1 tutor with EOTAS children. Can't wait.
Hopefully I will see my own three children more and get to be the wife, sister, daughter and mother I actually want to be.
Teaching will suck the life out of you.

I’m not a teacher but have plenty in my family and these are my thoughts reading your post.

Furst I think you need to have a really clear understanding of what normal is for teaching in terms of expectations of employers, workload etc / at least validating your expectations are realistic. I say this because it isn’t obvious to me whether the two schools you’ve left are unduly burdensome (compared to teaching as a profession generally) or whether you are being unrealistic about what you can expect as an inexperienced teacher. Is there someone you’ve worked with who is experienced you could talk through with? I see this in other roles sometimes - junior professionals who think they are so hard done by and their employer expectations are unreasonable and the grass will be greener elsewhere when really the expectations are simply normal in those jobs so they either need to adjust or go do something else.

Second why are you applying to roles but repeatedly not bothering to interview? Aren’t you just wasting eveeyone’s time in applying? Are you self sabotaging here?

Third, remote jobs are very popular and highly sought after. What sort of roles are you applying for and what do you bring to that table to match what they want?

Finally if there were schools you like have you been to you liked have you contacted them to see if they have any need? If not why not?

Doesn't sound like you're happy- time to move on

Perhaps teaching school age children isn’t the career for you after four schools of mostly misery.

Can you look into trying another career that utilises your skills, qualifications and experience? Perhaps as an OFSTED inspector? Or writing textbooks/study guides? Working for the exam board as an exam question author and grader? Perhaps full time study to get the MSc and then a funded PhD position, so you can teach adults?

Teaching is not your friend if you want a family. Really. You'll never see your own kids! I've missed so much of my own DCs childhood (and I've not even worked full time since they were little).
Just get out and start again. It really doesn't get better or easier.

@WomanIsTaken Totally agree with you on this one.
But so many (deluded) people genuinely believe it's an own child friendly profession when nothing could be further from the truth.

Teaching is not a family-friendly profession these days. I left after 26 years and wish I’d left sooner.

It doesn’t really sound like teaching is for you. You’ve jumped around and had a number of issues in a short space of time. The comment from your school about wanting you to stay but you not wanting to get stuck in more stood out to me- can you explain more?

This is only partly true. Most teachers I know only pay for the odd day, holiday camps and that sort of thing. There is a lot of evening working in the holidays though!

You're not happy in teaching. No one should go into teaching for the holidays - the people I have known who have stated this as their reason are utterly miserable.

I disagree that teaching is not a family friendly job - I really appreciate the time I have with my kids over the holidays and it does make up for the times I have missed nativities and other small school occasions. Most head teachers are reasonable over this now, too, especially now that wellbeing is such a massive factor.

Workload is huge in any school, that much will be unlikely to change. The type may differ (where one school is hot on marking, another may have a laborious behaviour management system, yet another may require lots of extra-curricular work) but never the amount.

Look for work outside of teaching. It really isn't a job everyone can do.

Teaching is very high workload for the Money you get.
In the first few years it is very intense.

Some schools have lower workload than others but all are quite high compared to (for example) office jobs where you leave at 5.

Many teachers are now leaving (or not starting in the first place).

When my kids were young and I didn't have the time to do the workload outside of contact hours I was a TA for a bit.

Depending on your money situation you might want to consider that and investing your time in applying for other jobs.

Remote jobs are highly sought after and lots of people apply for them. If you can consider hybrid or in person you are much more likely to get the job.

I have seen other people recommending the civil service.

Have you considered looking for a job teaching psychology? FE college or school sixth form? You spend a summer getting the bulk of your SoW sorted and resources organised and away you go. The day to day is much less onerous. I teach 11-18, and 30 years in and still love it. I have rarely had to work in the evenings or weekend after the first couple of years and other than having to negotiate an hour here or there to see my kids' nativities I think it's been generally great. No holiday childcare needed at all other than the odd INSET. I know primary is v different which I think is what you are?

OP it doesn't come across as though you like the job. You haven't mentioned the kids, the classroom experience or loving teaching but hating the extra bits which is what people normally say and is understandable. Maybe it's just not for you.

Came on to echo what others said. If a motivation to stay is your future family, leave now! You have to accept family life in term time is difficult- my kids were in breakfast club and after school club from first day of reception. Dealing with illness is tough - you can’t just up and leave to pick up a sick kid. You’ll miss events. DS is autistic and I had to reschedule his EHCP review 3 x as I couldn’t get cover.

When I first started teaching in 2000, I loved it even though I was in a rough school. So much money under Labour! A teacher joined my dept Set (3rd year) and all she has done for a week is cry in her breaks as she can’t cope with the pressure. Teaching isn’t for everyone and if you’re unhappy now, it won’t get better. Don’t let yourself get trapped in a job you dislike.

Moving around so much and not staying at schools for very long can’t be helping. I know that whenever I’ve moved to a new school (I’ve been a teacher for well over 10 years), the workload has felt really intense for the first few months as you have to get used to a new way of doing things.

Saying that, teaching is an intense job with lots of expectations (like others have said these vary from school to school). I have found it gets easier/you get quicker at things and learn to prioritise better as you get more experienced. This is probably helped by not moving around so much to different schools and year groups.

Applying for jobs and not going to the interviews is an utter waste of time particularly when you feel so overwhelmed. There is also unlikely to be many remote jobs in education as understandably most of the roles you are qualified for are in the classroom.

Honestly, I don’t think teaching is for you.

I do this. Love it!

Finding the right school helps massively. I'm in primary and we have 3 classes in each year group. The planning is shared between us and it makes a massive difference. I remember when I first started teaching, I was on my own and had to plan everything, it took me an age! Different schools have different marking policies too. My current school is really hot on making life as easy for us as possible so tick and flick is okay for some pieces of work! I've been teaching 12 years and can't see myself leaving any time soon or leaving my current school. Keep searching!

I am studying msc psychology at the moment part time But won't be able to do PHd anytime soon.

What do you want a PhD for? Are you planning to go into academia?

These were my thoughts too. We get a lot of young people in through the door whose expectations of work what actually entails is laughable.
I look at the expectations on our kids in schools though and it's all "star of the week for trying hard" rather than a genuine meritocracy or genuinely challenging them to be more capable and resilient. Likewise, the list of parents messaging before Scouts or Brownies saying "X is too tired" or "Y doesn't feel like it today". Erm. X and Y made a commitment to attend and the parent helpers (who volunteer for free by the way) deserve a similar amount of effort.

Sorry OP. Suck it up.

I’m curious as to what you meant by schools ‘expecting too much’? As you have encountered it in a couple of places, it may unfortunately be the case that those are the expectations. But I don’t think that you’ve really given yourself a chance to get embedded in a school and get familiar with the workload or systems. Even having the parents know you better has huge benefits.

I suggest that you approach the school that you did like and see if they have any vacancies coming up.

I left teaching a while ago and certainly don’t regret it, but I’m now in my late forties and, if you can be happy as a teacher, there are upsides that I now appreciate. For example:

The pension is second to none.

Clear pay and progression routes.

The job security, whereas I have been at risk of redundancy more than once in my new sector. The charity sector has been recommended on this thread, but it is an uncertain sector, very popular and several national charities have folded this year.

The low competition for teaching jobs compared to other sectors. Whereas it is really common for other jobs to get hundreds of applicants. Pop over to the Work board if you don’t believe me!

But take heart, because you will find your niche eventually.