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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To want my lodgers kids to leave?

43 replies

lover99 · 15/12/2024 20:15

I want to say, I love my lodger and hope she rents my room forever.

However, we share a tiny 1 bedroom house and I think inviting her adult kids into the house was ill-advised. She has told me they would be leaving today, but they are still here. They have been here 4 days.

In the time they have been here, they have:

  • Had 1 hour showers in the evening
  • Used all the hot water (30 gallon tank) and then acted shocked that there was no more, demanding an explanation as to why the hot water wasn't working.
  • Got BACK IN the shower AGAIN after the hot water came back on an hour later, like using my entire tank wasn't enough (Bills are included in her rent)
  • Sloshed water ALL over the floor and water has literally leaked into the ceiling below so its dripping through the floorboards.

When I showed her kids the leak and politely asked them to not get water on the floor, there was no apology. When I asked them to take shorter showers, they started to take a shower in the morning and the evening.

I don't know how to manage this, and I really like my lodger. She's very nice and from Portugal and her family are based in Portugal, so I understand that must be hard for her. The property is entirely unsuitable for 4 people to share it and I'm holding in my piss for unacceptable amounts of time and even had to piss in an empty yoghurt container. I don't understand why they didn't just get a hotel, there's a BnB on our road. I'm not a millionaire and energy is extremely, extremely expensive.

She told me they were coming after she booked their flights and she did the same thing when her husband came, but he wasn't any trouble. She said they'd be flying today, I really don't know how much longer I can stand sharing a tiny 1 bed with 3 other people.

I'm in the top bedroom, she's in the living room/kitchen. The rent is substantially reduced due to this setup and I don't cook.

To want my lodgers kids to leave?
OP posts:
Needmorelego · 15/12/2024 20:17

Where on earth do you sleep?

Overthebow · 15/12/2024 20:17

How do you have a lodger in a 1 bed? Where do you sleep?

lover99 · 15/12/2024 20:18

Overthebow · 15/12/2024 20:17

How do you have a lodger in a 1 bed? Where do you sleep?

I just edited my post to clarify the living situation.

OP posts:
socks1107 · 15/12/2024 20:19

Where do you sleep? Where are they sleeping?

ElfAndSafetyBored · 15/12/2024 20:19

Seriously? Where are you all sleeping?

How do you share this space with even a single lodger?

Simonjt · 15/12/2024 20:20

You can’t really moan when you’re charging someone to sleep in your kitchen.

KangaRoo00 · 15/12/2024 20:20

How have you not totally lost your shit at then? How fucking entitled are they?!!

Needmorelego · 15/12/2024 20:20

Sounds a dreadful living arrangement even with just two of you.
Do you desperately need a lodger?

lover99 · 15/12/2024 20:20

ElfAndSafetyBored · 15/12/2024 20:19

Seriously? Where are you all sleeping?

How do you share this space with even a single lodger?

I get on fine with a single lodger but having 4 adults in one house is too much for me and I'm getting anxious that she said they'd be flying back today but haven't left for their flight yet.

OP posts:
Whathappensnowplease · 15/12/2024 20:20

Why aren't you just telling these people they need to leave?

lover99 · 15/12/2024 20:21

Needmorelego · 15/12/2024 20:20

Sounds a dreadful living arrangement even with just two of you.
Do you desperately need a lodger?

Uhh yeah I do. I don't feel comfortable living alone.

OP posts:
MumChp · 15/12/2024 20:21

She is in the living room/kitchen and she doesn't have her own bedroom?

Say no guests. Case closed.

lover99 · 15/12/2024 20:21

KangaRoo00 · 15/12/2024 20:20

How have you not totally lost your shit at then? How fucking entitled are they?!!

I just want them to leave :(

OP posts:
Shouldbedoing · 15/12/2024 20:21

I'm confused. The only bedroom is 9 foot by 11 foot. Even if each adult kid is only 5' 6 and slim, I don't know how they fit. And where do you sleep, OP?
She's taking the mickey, though

SchoolDilemma17 · 15/12/2024 20:21

This is madness. Ask them to leave tomorrow.

AgnesX · 15/12/2024 20:22

The living situation is unsuitable by anyone's standards.

Beats me why you're doing it like this but she needs her own space that she can share with her family

MumChp · 15/12/2024 20:22

lover99 · 15/12/2024 20:21

I just want them to leave :(

Ask them to? You have zero space for guests.

ElfAndSafetyBored · 15/12/2024 20:23

lover99 · 15/12/2024 20:21

I just want them to leave :(

Have you asked them to leave? If not, you need to.

And you need to tell your lodger no more overnight visitors without agreement from you.

Onlyvisiting · 15/12/2024 20:23

Endure it until they leave (provided it is within the next couple days) then sit down with your lodger and say that she absolutely cannot have anymore overnight guests (I'd inside the DH) this is not an appropriate space for additional people and it doesn't work.

HeddaGarbled · 15/12/2024 20:23

Is this even legal? To take money off someone who doesn’t even have a bedroom?

lover99 · 15/12/2024 20:24

Onlyvisiting · 15/12/2024 20:23

Endure it until they leave (provided it is within the next couple days) then sit down with your lodger and say that she absolutely cannot have anymore overnight guests (I'd inside the DH) this is not an appropriate space for additional people and it doesn't work.

I don't mind if she has one person, her husband was fine, but two people is a lot

OP posts:
lover99 · 15/12/2024 20:24

HeddaGarbled · 15/12/2024 20:23

Is this even legal? To take money off someone who doesn’t even have a bedroom?

She has more space than I do and she has her own kitchen. It's like a 'studio flat' sort of setup.

OP posts:
LumpyandBumps · 15/12/2024 20:25

HeddaGarbled · 15/12/2024 20:23

Is this even legal? To take money off someone who doesn’t even have a bedroom?

Most studio flats are one room which serves as kitchen lounge and bedroom.

Needmorelego · 15/12/2024 20:25

Ok...
You need to tell the lodger her children have to go by a certain date (if not tomorrow then Tuesday). If they don't go then tell her you will be ending her tenancy.
If however you decide you want her to stay you need to her to sign a new agreement that no guests can stay overnight ever.
She can decide if she wants to stay she has to stick with that rule.

Annabella92 · 15/12/2024 20:25

HeddaGarbled · 15/12/2024 20:23

Is this even legal? To take money off someone who doesn’t even have a bedroom?

She does have a bedroom. It's her room with her bed in it. Do you think it should be free?