Are some dog owners a bit deluded about their dogs?

[jennylamb1]

Just putting it out there- my mum has dogs, but with a sensible attitude I think- the dog stays downstairs at nights, as a puppy he is being trained, he is treated well but not not like a human being.
Some dog owners though seem to justify their dog's behaviour out of some ill advised need to defend them at all times, even in the face of reality. A previous poster on here had a dog who was biting visitors, but justified it because he was a rescue dog and they were warning bites and hadn't broken the skin. I had to take a detour running on a woodland path yesterday because an aggressive barking dog was stood in my path and the owner just thought they'd tell them off without thinking of putting them on a lead/restraining them. This week at the vet a dog owner with two large dogs leaping up at my nervous cat's cat carrier said that it was OK because they knew cats at home and were fine with them (whilst leaping up at my...).
Are there dog owners and then dog owners?

I remember being shouted at because my pug who was on a lead and sniffing a tree was apparently at fault when two off- lead Rottweilers decided to run over to him. She asked me to move because my dog was winding hers up?! I laughed to myself and let him carry on sniffing the tree. I see her all the time with the dogs running circles around her totally out of control. Obnoxious cow!

That about sums it up.

My dog sleeps upstairs and (shock horror) sometimes in my bed because he's a dog and they are social animals. Not because I treat him like a child. Dogs used to be allowed to roam freely they didn't get locked up in a barn on their own all night unless they were farm dogs with the other dogs.
^
He's fine on his own of course and I don't take him anywhere inside where I know he wouldn't be enthusiastically welcomed with treats and a fuss. ^

I don't think it's helpful to equate dog that gets to spend time with his human with a dog that misbehaves. I see plenty^ of nervous/ aggressive dogs that get smacked by their owners or are locked in a crate over night. They're the people not treating dogs like dogs.

There are just arseholes that have arsehole dogs.
^

I'm not. She's an absolute cow of the first order and can be replaced by...well, almost anything that doesn't tear around barking all the time. Bloody working breeds.

I love her unreservedly of course, and she knows it. But I am not deluded about her. She's pure evil and it's a good job I love her, because nobody else would have her.

@Billyandharry DH said his mates call it the "2 year puppy pass". I.e. if your girlfriend wants a baby, you get her a puppy and it buys you another 2 years 😐

She wasn’t saying dogs and kids were the same, she was making the point about deluded parents/ owners who think their offspring can do no wrong acting the same

I think it has become more apparent since Covid. Did those who already have dogs just get used to doing everything with their dog as you could only do things outside or in your own home and they're just used to it now? And those who got puppies in Covid brought those puppies up knowing no different and it was obviously hard to socialise them so they may be more anxious and less good at being left alone?
DS is 12 and was bitten once as a toddler (he was sat in his pushchair eating a biscuit and a cocker spaniel jumped up into the pushchair to eat his biscuit), chased in my grandparents' enclosed garden as a 4yo (dog being walked off lead barged past a visitor to my grandparents as the visitor opened the gate) and then knocked over by an exuberant large dog in the woods a few months later so dogs being out of control was fairly common a decade ago but the massive difference now is the places they can frequent.
Last week I was in The White Company with a black retriever brushing up against the cream clothes; in John Lewis yesterday a Labrador was sniffing around the materials in haberdashery and then had its paws up on the cutting table; a coffee this morning was somewhat spoiled by two dogs with separate groups who were seated next to each other yapping at each other for the entire time we were in there. A friend works in a clothes shop and a dog did a poo on the carpet about a fortnight ago. Why was a dog in any of these places?

Our vet have now separated cats and dogs in the waiting room. Cats are one side of a 5ft partition, dogs are the other side, I think that says it all

Yes OP - I think there are dog owners and dog owners.

How many threads are there on here about dogs - well many . I utterly understand why some don't like dogs . I have one and he is on a lead on all pavements until he gets into a park where dogs are allowed. He is well trained .

I took him to a different park & went to cafe there ( I put him on the lead ) and a small child had a stick and was trying to poke his eyes. Now - a dog can be as well behaved as whatever but poking their eyes with a stick isn't great . I removed my dog. Mother of said child didn't seem to be bothered.

If I honestly thought my dog was nippy or aggressive I would take that and make sure they stayed away from others or at home - but he isn't.

Not all dog owners are reprehensible.

Lots of people are idiots.
Some of them have dogs.

I don't think delusions are any more common in dog owners than non dog owners. Rates of delusion seem roughly similar to that found in parents discussing their children's behaviour.

Absolutely.
Children are human beings. We need people to have children as they will be the adults of the future.
A dog is an animal, of course it should be treated kindly but it's not a member of the family and is on no way comparable with a child.

The parents/owners do compare.

Some very strange behaviour around dog owning has developed over recent years.
I don't own a dog as I don't believe I have time for that level of commitment to train. I do have a cat who is very loved but behaves as a cat and as cats always have. So yes he sleeps where he wants , does what he wants and we all do as he says. He is a cat, this behaviour is the same as my grandparents cats. He stays home and doesn't come with us on days out. He also doesn't care if we go out all day as long as we feed him when we do turn up.
when we had dogs as children they did as they were told, they slept in the kitchen at night and did not get on sofas or beds ( that was seen as a cat thing) and certainly didn't bark or jump up at people.
They were trained properly and that's where real commitment comes in. The word no was said firmly and they knew what it meant.

I have a work colleague who has recently got a small toy breed without any real research or knowledge. Her reason was her children ( late teens) wanted a pet.
She is struggling to train it, struggling with leaving it and I am literally left opened mouthed by her sudden surprise that she has to sort dog care to go on a holiday.
Dogs seem to be fashionable somehow. Colleague would honestly have been better off with a cat in her circumstances but she wanted the current fashionable breed of dog. ( never owned an animal in her life).

So despite me being brought up with dogs I have no desire to join current dog owners with this madness.

You are right. It’s not all dog owners but definitely a large and growing section. I don’t believe it is good for the dogs either and in some cases almost abuse to the animal, buying it its own takeaway is not kind.
I’ve just nuked Christmas because I won’t go to mums for Xmas if my brother and his wife insist on bringing their biting dog with “separation anxiety” for Xmas lunch. It IS a BITING dog that rules the bloody roost and they and it can eff off.

It took me a full year, every single day, to train my Doberman. Hundreds of hours, to make a few simple training videos into reality. Its very tedious, and takes unlimited patience. I reckon less than 5% of dogs have that level of training. And it was all basic stuff like sitting down at kerbs, reliable recall and not pulling on the leash. They want a fluffy friend, not something to be invested in through time and persistance. Then they blame the dog for its behaviour.

Dog ownership turns a lot of people fucking crazy.

@FigTreeInEurope What a great post - we have a border terrier ( well we used to have 2 more but sadly passed away ) but the newest one - every day he is trained to sit , not pull on lead , recall need treats but he does it. The previous two went to dog training and now we think we could do this and he is behaving.

Re Dobermans - not the same but My mother' friend ( who was in charge of the MET police dog division ) his German shepherd - so a big dog - was so well behaved . she went for a walk and a little yappy dog was jump umping up at her and she ignored it. But when she got bored she just put her paw over its head and made it lie down . So gentle .

One thing I do not like is dog walkers who cannot control their dogs. I have a friend who was a dog walker and he would only take two. I have seen ( & I am short ) people taking dogs for a walk - so eg those husky looking dogs - I couldn't control 3 dogs of that size, & this dog walker lost control of one so DH picked up ours.

Yanbu. I went to browse in a branch of Waterstones this week - a lovely Christmassy thing to do. I lasted less than 10 minutes and bought nothing because there was a woman in their with her 3 or 4 kids all trying to find books to take on their forthcoming long haul flight. Not only was she having very loud conversations with all of them simultaneously, her bloody dog was barking throughout. It had the sort of yelp that sounded like it was in pain. She was standing right in front of the payment desk, the dog barking and yapping and running around her in circles. I mean W. T. F. ?? I was so annoyed that the staff did nothing too. So I left. It was nerve jangling!

Mine definitely sleeps downstairs. She did sleep in my bed for the first 12 months but that was entirely due to Logistics . We were living in a flat and how on earth can you stop?
But now we’re in a house she’s downstairs in the kitchen
I have bought her an electric blanket though, and you will never seen a happier creature
But she is a dog.
And you read about these people that spend £9000 on keeping dogs alive which I would never do in 1 million years. There are children in this world starving it can’t be justified.

I think a small minority of people are a bit ott about their dogs and the rest of it is over exaggerated nonsense made up by MNers.

Yup.

There are dog owners who fully understand that their animal is just that, an animal. That animals do not understand about Santa and Christmas, and actually just want to stick to their usual routine and go for a nice long walk.

Then there are DOG MUMMAS who refer to their animal as an equal member of the family on par with anyone's children, who demand Fido be accepted as a guest on Christmas Day because you wouldn't leave granny at home would you, and Fido is just the same. Or who just treat their animal like a furry human, without actually realising that dogs have quite different needs.

Dog owners don't have to explain themselves to you and Mumsnet. "Oooh I'm such a good girl, so considerate of everyone. Validate me please!!"

An exchange along the lines of “no worries either way, but can I bring the dog if I come over for Christmas?” turns into them demanding the dog sits at the head of the table and carves the turkey.

I don’t disagree about people training their dogs and not bothering other people , expecting them to go everywhere etc however that has nothing to do with dogs sleeping upstairs and being a proper integrated family member . I didn’t expect to take my late dog anywhere but if he wasn’t welcome one of us , or all of us , stayed home with him . He was absolutely a member of our family and was respected as such .

We moved to our last house ten years ago. Nearby are fields and suitable areas for dog walking, bur not off lead. In 2020/21, the number of dogs in the area rose exponentially and the level of training didn’t rise to the same extent. There are far too many folk who got a dog for something to do and either couldn’t or didn’t want to train them. It’s a nightmare to try to walk round the area now and the amount of dog poo is alarming.

A local dog rescue place frequently puts posts on FB about lost and found dogs, describing them as ‘ this dear little girl’ or ‘ this lovely boy’. No, they’re not. They’re male or female dogs.

We’ve moved to an area with far fewer dogs and it’s so much more pleasant.

My 2 are allowed anywhere in the house, apart from 1 of my daughters room. The dogs go for walks, never taken them shopping or to eating places.

My dogs are not fur babies (hate that word), not replacement children. Good company for me and my adult kids.