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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbours and parcels

105 replies

LA1311 · 13/12/2024 07:16

My partner works from home and I’m currently home on maternity leave. Our next door neighbours are aware of this, they are young and both work full time.

Nearly every day we are getting parcels for them, it’s getting beyond a joke now. I’ve I’m not home my partner, keeps being disturbed from his work and having to go downstairs to answer the door.

It’s not too bad if I’m home, but it’s still a pain and multiple times if I’ve not answered the door because the baby is napping on me and I can see the delivery driver and know it’s not ours I’ve had the delivery drivers coming and banging on the living room window and waking the baby up.

If we’re not home, we’ve had delivery drivers searching all over our property to leave the parcel, because we’ve got a garden and a side entrance.

I didn’t mind taking the odd parcel for them but this is getting silly now.

It’s not even like they come and collect the parcels from ours, they will sit at ours until we take them around to them. She must know that they have been delivered because she will have had notifications.

AIBU for refusing her parcels and asking her to leave delivery instructions not to leave parcels with us?

OP posts:
Whyherewego · 13/12/2024 07:19

Just refuse to take them. The delivery drivers will soon get the hint

44PumpLane · 13/12/2024 07:19

Tape a note to the door stating you will only accept parcels addressed to your house number and asking them not to knock u less the parcels are specifically for number (your house).

Turn them away every time!

BMW6 · 13/12/2024 07:19

Tell them it's becoming a nuisance and you won't be accepting any more so they need to make other arrangements. Put a sign on your door to this effect so they don't bother to ring.

Oreyt · 13/12/2024 07:20

I understand.

I mean it's not necessarily the couriers fault and if the neighbours work I'm not sure that can be avoided.

They need a safe space.

I take in loads but whenever I need something taking in the courier just take it away.

I totally understand your frustration.

Some neighbours even put our address as the automatic safe place.

Oreyt · 13/12/2024 07:21

Hopefully it will die down after Christmas but they need to buy a safe box thing.

Aquacitra · 13/12/2024 07:23

Stick a sign on your door, or gate saying parcels for this address only. If they still knock, refuse them. We stopped taking in a a neighbours parcels who would leave them for days and we have no space.

Nolegusta · 13/12/2024 07:25

I said YABU because just say no.
I would probably go to neighbours and explain that while your partner is at home, he is working, and so cannot keep being disturbed to take parcels for them. I'd put a sign on entrance(s) saying 'no parcels not for this address'. You could also contact the courier company/RM and ask them to stop.
It's not your responsibility to be part of their delivery service.

StMarie4me · 13/12/2024 07:30

My neighbour put my address as a safe drop off without asking me. Delivery drivers hammered on my door. It really freaked out my disabled DD27, and made her feel unsafe until I was home.
I went next door and explained that I don't get parcels delivered to my house and could they remove our address. They did so and we have had no problems since.
I have an Amazon locker for deliveries.

Devilsmommy · 13/12/2024 07:35

Oreyt · 13/12/2024 07:20

I understand.

I mean it's not necessarily the couriers fault and if the neighbours work I'm not sure that can be avoided.

They need a safe space.

I take in loads but whenever I need something taking in the courier just take it away.

I totally understand your frustration.

Some neighbours even put our address as the automatic safe place.

This annoys me. I would never put a neighbour as a safe space unless we'd agreed it. The cheek of just doing it 🙄

Cartwrightandson · 13/12/2024 07:57

Put a note on your front door saying you can't accept parcels from any other addresses.

Whowhatwhere21 · 13/12/2024 08:06

I had the same with my neighbour, most of our drivers are regulars so I told them the once and haven't been asked since. That or leave a note taped to your door 'no parcels unless for this address please'

YippyKiYay · 17/12/2024 05:53

You could put a sign on the door saying not to knock or ring as the baby is sleeping. I left one on my front door for ages. It was v quiet.

hookiewookie29 · 17/12/2024 06:01

I can never understand why people order stuff to be delivered knowing full well that they won't be in to take them in! Nowadays, with most companies that you order stuff from, you can choose the day and time you want it delivered, use click and collect,or drop off points! Totally unfair to expect other people to be ok with taking them in all the time!

ChainReactionQueen · 17/12/2024 06:09

i think its neighbourly to take parcels in for people, and you never know when you may need their help with something. It may reduce after Christmas. Why don’t you have a quick chat with them, and explain the difficulty with the baby & work, ask them to come for the parcels promptly and see if they can nominate a safe place other than your house. It’s good to communicate - they might not realise the inconvenience to you. I’m glad on my road we all help each other out with things like this.

Blackdovedown · 17/12/2024 06:12

Just refuse the parcels, the drivers will soon realise as it’s often the same people in the same routes.
Have the. Neighbours specifically put in the notes ‘ deliver to #34 ‘ etc as an alternative when they’re out? Excuse they can a lot of the time. Maybe have a word to check. Tell them it’s not convenient re work

We have a horrible neighbour that we won’t take parcels for and the delivery drivers realised in a couple of weeks…

Blackdovedown · 17/12/2024 06:13

hookiewookie29 · 17/12/2024 06:01

I can never understand why people order stuff to be delivered knowing full well that they won't be in to take them in! Nowadays, with most companies that you order stuff from, you can choose the day and time you want it delivered, use click and collect,or drop off points! Totally unfair to expect other people to be ok with taking them in all the time!

Can you? Unless it’s a fridge or some thing we can’t… we can pick a day but that’s it…

Sparxdislike · 17/12/2024 06:16

I had this and in the end refused and neighbour did a note with a safe place. It was getting ridiculous. Even putting my address as the c/o.

Babyghirl · 17/12/2024 06:38

I had a girl that lived 4 doors away from my mum and dad, had a note on her door deliver to and there address on it, same person wouldn't speak to any other time, my mum has copd and couldn't run to the door. Cf at the next level.

RoseMarigoldViolet · 17/12/2024 06:39

I have been in your exact position with a neighbour’s parcels. I decided to continue taking them because I felt sympathy for the delivery guys. They are always very grateful.

I think of that Ken Loach movie Sorry We Missed You about a delivery guy and showing what a hard job it is.

SweetBobby · 17/12/2024 06:42

"Hi neighbours, unfortunately due to work and baby we cannot continue to accept your parcels as they are too frequent. Please find another solution, there are some good parcels safes on Amazon."

goldencabbage · 17/12/2024 06:45

How does the interaction go when you take the parcels over?

Goatinthegarden · 17/12/2024 06:46

I will happily take a parcel for my neighbours and vice versa….but only as an occasional help - they don’t exist to serve my needs. We’re out at work all day. If I order a parcel, I either organise it for mine or DHs work, a safe place on my property if it’s cheap, or the post office round the corner does a pick up service.

i don’t think it’s unreasonable to ask your neighbours to make other arrangements.

Frankfurterwuerstchen · 17/12/2024 06:46

I used to take the odd parcel for our neighbours in our block of flats, but the driver soon realised that I was in and didn't even bother ringing our neighbours, and just rang my doorbell instead.I was at home when my children were young and it used to wake them up if they were napping.
Most of our neighbours were really grateful and gave us a little present at Christmas, but it was still annoying.
Then one set of neighbours put us as their designated place to leave parcels so I spoke to the delivery driver and said I wasn't going to take anything for other people anymore.
We were getting four or five parcels for other people and then having to deliver them as the drivers didn't even leave them a note.
I understand how much pressure the delivery drivers are under, but it then became our responsibility.

Pinkcountrybumpkin · 17/12/2024 07:25

I have a note on my door that says ‘baby sleeping do not ring or knock’ then it says my phone number. You could do something similar and add that you only want your own parcels , to be fair though I never request parcels to be delivered to my neighbours and occasionally they end up next door

roseymoira · 17/12/2024 07:45

hookiewookie29 · 17/12/2024 06:01

I can never understand why people order stuff to be delivered knowing full well that they won't be in to take them in! Nowadays, with most companies that you order stuff from, you can choose the day and time you want it delivered, use click and collect,or drop off points! Totally unfair to expect other people to be ok with taking them in all the time!

I have this problem, I select a delivery date for when I'm going to be at home, and it turns up days early

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