To resigned from job?

[chrissy886]

I came back to work from maternity leave last week and the hours, times and days that were agreed have since been moved around so much and not accommodating to my childcare arrangements.

Manager would call and text even out of hours which I found quite stressful and always wanted to push the time back like for example a 5pm -8pm start (when partner would get back from work) start was agreed and now all of a sudden she wanted to change it to 10am and pressuring me to start when the team starts (I work form home).
It caused havoc.

My child is teething, having sleep regression and I am exhausted to be honest with the lack of sleep on top of dealing with her constant change of plans.

I have had a bad cold this weekend I called sick yesterday and she wouldn't stop calling.
I emailed HR this morning to advise them that I would be leaving immediately as it just didn't seem to be working.
Have I acted rationally or was it the right thing to do?

You've said partner so I'm assuming this means you are not married.

Do not be a stay at home parent unless you are married. Do not work part time either. Taking on this level of financial risk is insane. You need to marry to protect yourself as you're taking the hit to your earnings and future pension. Or go back to full time work.

To me it’s the straw that’s broke the camels back so to speak. Loads of additional stress over a span. You should have maybe spoken to HR first about outside hours contact etc but it’s stressful trying to work around little ones. You need balance x

Wait, she would email HR about you not answering her while on Ml? And what would HR do/say?!

Call centres are cunts. Your boss sounds worse than that.

Overreaction in the sense that you should have resigned properly with your notice and full disclosure on this twat to HR. If financially you’re okay, then not complete overreaction.

Line manager is probably mates with HR and “HR” will be just one person. Obviously they’re a bully like most of the power mad call centre managers are.

OP- you did the right thing, a call centre is not your career, as you said, beauty is. You can build your business back up around your baby.

Enjoy him/her and good luck.

You say ‘oartner’ not ‘husband’ - are you married? If not it’s vital to work full time IMO.

your manager’s behaviour sounds awful and possibly discriminatory, but quitting means that you have probably lost the opportunity to address it, it would have been better to use the company’s grievance process. You could explore doing that, even now. Harder to seek a new job when not working.

OP please contact ACAS urgently to discuss your position. If your flexible working has been agreed and your employer is requiring you to work alternatively to the agreed schedule you have rights. ACAS can guide you through appropriate next steps and advise whether this is constructive dismissal.

God OP I totally would have done the same! Beauty sounds far more fun and flexible than the hell of a call centre. People saying ‘you don’t just quit’…… you do in a call center 😅 it’s SO shit and people just quit at the drop of a hat all the time. I always assumed it’s not a problem for the call centre, otherwise surely they’d focus more on staff retention and satisfaction!

You definitely acted irrationally, I’d contact HR and discuss with them your reasons for doing this.
You can still make the decision to leave but highlight her behaviour because that’s not management, that’s someone being controlling and unorganised.

How long is your notice period OP?

You've shot yourself a bit in the foot really - the company probably haven't behaved properly towards you, but then you've reacted without thinking things through. Have a look at Pregnant then screwed, they might be able to help you.

Be very careful about being unmarried and financially dependent on your partner. Ideally, you should be earning money, and also contributing to your pension for the future.

You might be liable to pay back your Maternity Pay - best thing you could have done was to go off sick for as long as possible........and then hand in your notice.

None of this sounds great. But most women find it hard to readjust to working after maternity leave and it takes more than a week to settle back in.
This is a new work pattern for you and your manager and it sounds like you didn't make any real effort to resolve your issues.

As others have said, it's financially very risky to be a SAHM if you are not married, so you either need to find another job asap, or go back and negotiate with HR.

Youve definitely done the right thing! I agree.
Also those who say work full time if not married, errr she will have to pay a ton of childcare ? Sorry but if you have a child it’s your choice whether to be a SAHM whether you’re married or not.

Did you actually like your job? Would you like to stay there if your agreed hours were adhered to?

If so, you have overreacted. You needed to take your evidence of agreed work patterns and your manager changing them and then all the out of hours calling to HR. Your manager has acted appallingly.

Would you be able to talk to HR about the above?

If you didn't like your job, sounds like you have grounds for constructive dismissal.

BTW - there is no way I would be giving up my income if I am not financially protected just because 'DP' says so. The relationship could break down and you would be entitled to nothing. Consider marriage or a civil partnership - you need to think of your DC.

Why did your DP say you shouldn't go back to work?

Nevermind everyone saying you should have acted more rationally! It sounds like you were being bullied, harassed and gaslit all at the same time. Given your length of service, I would go for constructive dismissal. Screenshot all record of calls and messages and so on, keep records of any emails and then seek legal advice. The only thing I’d have done differently is go off sick before resigning but what’s done is done. Sounds like you were bullied out.

Honestly, if it's causing you that much stress and anxiety, good on you for quitting! I know everyone will say it's irrational,. irresponsible BUT You have one life, do not spend it stressed to the max every day. Especially if you don't need to financially. If money isn't a problem at the moment take a few months off, spend time enjoying your family. It's a job, not worth being miserable over, no doubt you can find another job when you are ready. Wishing you all the best op

I think you have done the right thing. Life's too short fkr the sort of nonsense you have faced.

You have more than two years' service and were returning from mat leave. That is constructive dismissal and sex discrimination.

Phone ACAS and get them to conciliation for you. I suspect you'd be happy to settle for three months' pay plus yiur notice period and any accrued annual leave. The risks are potentially high for the company as are the costs if younraise an ET1.

Now you've had a couple of days to think about this, the important thing to decide is if you could work under another manager following the hours you were promised would you want to return to the job?

If yes, contact HR and state that you felt unduly stressed and pressured when you wrote the resignation, and would like to revoke the resignation and open a formal grievance against your manager. That you are unable to work under that individual, have been harassed continuously during your maternity leave but still love your job and would consider returning to work under a different management line who respects your flexible working childcare arrangements.

If you don't want to go back, contact ACAS, citizens advice and a solicitor urgently (one that specialises in employment law and pregnancy discrimination, they should offer a 30 minute free consultation) and then go back to HR with their advice. The magic words are Harassment, maternity leave, legally protected flexible working arrangements constructive dismissal and consulting with your lawyer. You will probably be offered a compromise agreement where they pay a lump sum in exchange for you agreeing not to take them to tribunal, your legal team can advise if you should accept or continue to tribunal.

I'm sorry this has happened to you, good luck!

I would presume you can’t leave with immediate affect. I would contact HR and state that you will be working the agreed hours but need a meeting to discuss working arrangements. Do you have legal cover on any of your insurance policies as I would get some legal advice if you aren’t a union member.

This. 100%

If you have everything in writing and they changed it when you went back I'd say that would have been grounds for constructive dismissal but I'm not a lawyer so get to citizens advice/solicitor who deals with this.

Also your boss sounds like a grade A narcissistic micromanaging bitch. As Sheryl Sandberg once said, there is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. It's hard enough as it is for women to make any progress on the careers ladder thanks to men! If women don't help other women we are all screwed really! I bet she doesn't haven't kids herself and has no empathy for others. Your hormones are probably also still running wild and the thought of going back to work is already stressful without the added stress of your boss.

I'd however caution against living off your husband's wage because of one poor experience with one employer. I would find another job. Yes you might have a husband who's wage is big but meanwhile you are losing a pension unless he pays it and you will be expected to be a domestic servant whilst he swans off to play golf (insert other selfish hobby) and leaves you holding the baby and doing everything yourself. Unless that's what you want. Just take a look at the many many forums on here where women end up resentful of their husbands, lose interest in sex and husband runs off with another person! What happens if he gets made redundant/ runs off with another person and you have no other income? Financial freedom and security is everything, do not become shackled to a man for the next decade just because you didn't like one job! Please see the bigger picture and don't just go for an easy life now because I think you will regret it later. It's easy to lose yourself and your confidence when you are on maternity leave and have totally switched roles. It takes time to build back up, but you will do more damage to your work capability confidence sitting at home for years. In the real world people and employers don't respect the commitment of a SAHP, it's a thankless role that is unpaid and often taken for granted.

Of course you can! That’s quitting. They can’t force you to turn up to work your notice. Happens all the time.

You shouldn’t have to resign over what may amount to employer harassment.

Your employer shouldn’t be contacting you while you’re on any leave, including maternity leave, other than for Keeping in Touch days and to arrange your return to work.

Your employer shouldn’t contact you outside your normal working hours.

Join a union quickly and seek urgent advice. Your employment rights depend on your contract of employment and your employer’s HR policies. Unison represent call centre workers: www.unison.org.uk.

Tell HR you don’t want to resign, you simply want your employer to meet agreements on working patterns and respect boundaries. And that you’re seeking advice.