Teacher telling 7yo that Father Christmas not real

[Peaceandquietandacuppa]

Is it reasonable for a RE teacher to tell 7 year olds that Father Christmas isn’t real?

My 7 year old DS has just told me that his RE teacher told the class Father Christmas “isn’t real” today. He isn’t one to over-exaggerate. I asked if any of the kids prompted it by asking and he said no, she just said it.

If you think it’s unreasonable, would you say anything to the school?

YABU - teachers are fine to say FC is not real at the age of 7

YANBU - let the kids / parents decide if FC is real. Just don’t say anything!

My mother has a picture of herself dressed as the Easter Bunny from the mid 60s. I was a child of the 80s and had the Easter Bunny visit.

Did you have the tooth fairy?

That was my mother's line regarding the girl in my primary school class who claimed that her parents had woken her up putting her stocking on her bed - she'd been so naughty that year that Father Christmas didn't want to come to her, but her parents didn't want to disappoint her.

I didn't believe that, because I'd already caught on even before that child said that (I'd picked up that Santa always had the same wrapping paper as my family every year) but it was easier at the time to keep the peace and just keep playing along for what ended up being another two years.

YABU
Numerous psychological studies have proven that the Santa lie is harmful to children’s well being. That it isn’t “magic” to feel all satisfied and smug when they fully believe and trust you. In addition, it is all over the news how archaeologists have found Santa’s tomb, so just like the Wizard of Oz, the curtain has been swept aside.

Your RE teacher did you a favour, any upset you feel is from you having to deal with the fallout from lying to your child sooner rather than later. Sooner is always better than later for the child’s mental well-being.

There are some real joy suckers on this thread. Let children enjoy a bit of magical make belief. There is so much shit going on in the world at the moment I wish I could have a bit of magical make belief

If true that teacher is mean!

Surprised at all the people questioning the separate RE lessons though...my DC's state primary has separate RE, music and IT teachers. All done one morning a week and the class teachers do all their planning/prep etc then as they're not in class. Always seemed a very good set up all round to me

Magical make believe is meant to have everyone participating aware it is make believe and knowing the real truth. It doesn’t cover parents make believing while conning their children into real belief by keeping the truth from them.

There is more joy in this approach.

There really isn't.

No they haven't.

Well you wouldn’t know would you? You’ve not lived it both ways.

You are quite good at playing make believe.

7 year olds in the UK have an RE teacher?! When did that start happening?!

Where are these studies?

https://theconversation.com/why-you-shouldnt-lie-to-your-children-about-father-christmas-according-to-philosophers-245070

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2024/12/05/father-christmas-santa-claus-is-real-unethical-st-andrews/

https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/santa-father-christmas-real-north-pole-children-lying-psychology-experts-a7433951.html

These articles have links to multiple studies that they cited.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/ie/blog/the-baby-scientist/201612/why-its-ok-kids-believe-in-santa-claus

https://theconversation.com/why-its-ok-for-kids-to-believe-in-santa-128170

https://www.uhhospitals.org/blog/articles/2022/12/the-santa-debate-should-kids-be-told-the-truth

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2016/dec/01/santa-claus-is-a-phenomenal-imagination-driver-leave-him-alone

https://www.brisbanetimes.com.au/national/queensland/the-scientific-reason-why-believing-in-santa-is-good-for-children-20211222-p59jkq.html

Context is important. I've tried teaching a class of 7/8yos at this time of year about the nativity, ironically as a geography/modern studies lesson not RE, and still had to contend with several persistent children adding Santa to the story. I could imagine telling them he wasn't real. Some kids definitely didn't believe. Same class was far more interested in Holi than the nativity, sanctioned paint throwing and they are 7/8 -much more fun. Hanukkah also more fun with 8 nights of gifts. A good RE teacher would distract a Santa conversation into how other religions perceive or don't have a Santa figure though.

I agree with you, SugarandSpice. I didn't lie to my child but Christmas was still magical and joyful without a mythical figure bringing gifts. We should not insult the intelligence of children.

Yes

oh @CaptainMyCaptain how incredibly sad. the easter bunny was brought to the usa very early 1700's i believe. and as per google 1300's in the uk. someone ripped you off of many many years of chocolate!
born in 57, he was very much part of my childhood with my grandmother filling eggs with gifts and chocolate treats hidden in the nearby woods.

being that father christmas, is equally known at st nicholas, any re teacher could easily make mention of this unless the school is of the hebrew or muslim faith.
shows a lack of imagination on her part if indeed she said this.

The RE Curriculum doesn't teach children how to be Christians, often they are just lessons delivered by the class teacher or whoever is covering their ppa time. Nowadays RE just exposes children to the traditions and background of a range of different faiths. Unless in a religious school this tends to mean that conversations start with "Many Christians believe...", or "Many Jewish people believe...".

I think you are right to ask the question to find out what was actually said about Father Christmas and go from there.

I have always gone with the ‘ that’s because they are on the naughty list’ approach.

Don't be ridiculous. There are countless threads Google Mumsnet is 10 too old to believe in FC? and you'll see many parents wrangling with the decision to tell their kids the truth before secondary school.

Easter bunny definitely a thing in the 80s. We've doing Easter Egg hunts since at least 1983 in my family.

You do realise that a teacher of RE doesn’t have to follow a particular religion dont you? I mean, they’d have to be Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Hindu etc by your logic!
RE teachers teach ABOUT religions, they are not practitioners of the religions.

Fair enough but god isn't bloody real either. I bet the child would have got in trouble if they'd said that back though!

This is not the norm in the UK. Perhaps in private schools but even then it’s not standard