To think you should leave the room with your screaming baby?

[reventiania]

DS nativity today, 120 kids in the performance.

Throughout 75% of it, there were two babies (aged around 12 months) that were screaming and crying. It made it impossible to hear what the children were saying, and it essentially ruined the whole thing.

AIBU to think they should have left the room with them? I'm so cross for the children as they've worked so hard, just for crying babies to drown out their voices.

Of course.
Folk are self absorbed nowadays though.

It’s not tricky. Your little darling wants their parents there yes, but the whole room hates you because you’re ruining their experience. Have some self awareness and don’t be that parent.

DC4 is 13months, so I've done this situation a couple of times.

It's obviously best of you have a spare pair of hands. I always ask my mum to come for back-up if she can. Or if you can't take back-up, try desperately to organise childcare for a baby that has that on other days.

It's not fair on the children performing to let a child cry. Yes, it's it's balancing act, but you chose to have that when you chose to have more than one child. And yes, it can be upsetting to your eldest if you go out, which is why it's best to give them a bit cheery wave at the beginning it sit where they ring immediately notice you sneaking out if you need to. You can also prepare them - explain that someone is recording it for you, so if you do have to go out you won't really be missing it.

It's not ok to put your child's needs above every one else. Unless there are some really unusual circumstances, these things can usually be navigated fairly well.

Caveat: if a baby cried I think it is ok to spend ten seconds or so trying to settle them before you go out. Little ones might be fed into submission, a toddler might be distractabke with raisins etc.

I agree with you but I also have sympathy for the parents. Their child was probably in the performance and also they would have been aware of their parent leaving which could potentially be upsetting as well. Difficult. I tend to think it’s best not bring babies to these things at all. But not everyone has childcare options.

You can really spot the parents of these crying, nativity disrupting children on this thread can't you.

Nobody in their non-entitled mind thinks you are being unreasonable OP.

I had my wedding vows disrupted by a screaming baby. It was awful. The worst part was, we had no idea this baby existed (child of a cousin) and so the child wasn't even technically invited!

If this is the situation, the parent should arrange childcare at home and not bring the new baby to the performance.

YANBU. I brought my younger ones as babies to the older ones Xmas plays. I was armed with mini rice cakes and picture books to keep them quiet and distracted. And had to hush them at times or quietly point to things to keep them occupied and show them how to behave. When they were at their worst, I stood at the side, where it was easier to take them out if they got loud, without my other DC noticing or causing a disruption.

It’s never too soon to teach your kids to have respect for others.

It has always been like this.

Yanbu, crying babies need to be taken out. And immediately, not trying to settle while some poor child does their line they’ve been rehearsing for weeks.

Folk are more self absorbed these days.

I started teaching mid 80s and haven't noticed much change in that respect.

How is it tricky?! Upset one child or upset all of them and their parents - only someone very selfish would find this is not a clear cut decision.

Sympathy, yes. But prioritising the feelings of one child to the detriment of tens of others is just being rude.

Ah well, I've had different experiences.
The 'I must sit in the front row and block everyone else's view with my phone/tablet screen' gang are particularly annoying. Camcorders were less common and folk stood at the back more.

Nope. In no way can I make your comment make sense to me. 🫢

They weren't allowed at DD's school either, but they were invited to the final dress rehearsal instead.

Before this thread, would you not have seen an issue with your baby potentially crying and ruining it for all the other kids?

Mic’d up! Not in any school I was ever in, mind you, the special effects when the angels “flew” overhead were spectacular, bless you CGI, blew the entire school budget for the year but omg, we are still talking about it……..

Agree

Yes, absolutely selfish for them not to leave! I’d have been furious

Don't care. The other kids are performing. That needs respect. Have you tried performing with a load of noise going on?

My daughter has just become a teacher, and I had the pleasure of attending her class's nativity play. It was charming, although a few parents had younger children who were quite loud. I understand they don't want to miss out on their children's moments, but it felt somewhat inconsiderate. The school had made a classroom available for when their baby began to cry, so there truly was no excuse.
I must add that nothing has changed from when I saw her perform in her class Nativity play 20 years ago!

Of course you have to remove them! I can’t believe people are actually trying to defend the alternative.

Ruining the play for an entire class and all the parents just so not to upset one child is madness.

Better one child is upset (by their parent stepping out with their baby sibling) than 30 children upset as they can’t be heard over cries!

It’s selfish to put the gratification of one over the many.

In that scenario, you pre warn your child that if their baby sibling starts to cry , then you will have to take them out and that you’ll do your very best to come back as soon as possible but in case you don’t, the most important thing is that baby sibling doesn’t spoil the entire show for all the other children and families.

Simple 😊

Tough. It is an easy situation. Teach your kids respect.