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Original poster

There isn't a 'true' mirror?

45 replies

AppleWhiskers · 09/12/2024 00:16

You get used to the ones you have, but sometimes they're extreme. We have one at home that actually makes people gasp in horror when they catch themselves in it Grin

But on holiday, it was like a funhouse!
One bedroom had a huge wall mounted 'thin' mirror that stretched my head into the shape of Bert from Sesame Street (Hi Burt!), and a whopper of a wide mirror in the other bedroom. This wasn't so much wide as almost wavy, just like the ones you might see in a funhouse.
The wide mirror stretched my cheeks outwards so that I looked 20 yrs younger, yet unfathomably squat.

Mirror in the bathroom gave us cone shaped foreheads.

Do you have what you would call a true mirror? And if so, how do you know?
Shop windows are notoriously distorted, and the worst changing rooms I can recall were good old marks&spencer's.

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 09/12/2024 05:17

Weirdly no mirror can be. Because it's always reversed. There's a bloke who makes reversing mirrors but they aren't cheap!

The truest reflections are when you catch yourself in a shop window when you don't know it's you. Because you haven't added meaning to the experience.

I've gone all philosophical!

the80sweregreat · 09/12/2024 05:34

I've an aversion to mirrors and had body dysmorphia as a teen , so I do try to not look in them too much , although for somethings it's impossible to avoid of course !
I hate seeing myself in any type of mirror

Mymanyellow · 09/12/2024 05:39

I used to have a lovely mirror. Made me look good in it every time( no mean feat I assure you)
Don’t know what happened to that.

asquideatingdough · 09/12/2024 05:44

I often wonder which is the most realistic reflection because I can look quite different in each one. The one in my local H&M changing room is so awful I always leave without buying anything. I try to only look in certain ones and ignore ones in shops or my reflection in windows etc. I rather envy people in the pre modern world who would have rarely if ever seen themselves. Nowadays where we see our image in photos and in zoom calls etc its so much worse than ever

HarrietJonesFlydaleNorth · 09/12/2024 05:58

I think an angled full length mirror is more flattering than one that's flat against the wall. So a full length mirror that's leaning against the wall or similar. It does give me a shock when I'm in the shops though and their flat mirrors show the true horror of my knees 😆

Behindthethymes · 09/12/2024 06:03

My bedroom mirror is lovely, and always shows me nice views but I think she lies. Catching sight of myself unexpectedly in a strange mirror or shop window is always demoralising.

SaagAloopa · 09/12/2024 06:06

HarrietJonesFlydaleNorth · 09/12/2024 05:58

I think an angled full length mirror is more flattering than one that's flat against the wall. So a full length mirror that's leaning against the wall or similar. It does give me a shock when I'm in the shops though and their flat mirrors show the true horror of my knees 😆

I expect your knees are lovley

ImDuranDuran · 09/12/2024 06:08

asquideatingdough · 09/12/2024 05:44

I often wonder which is the most realistic reflection because I can look quite different in each one. The one in my local H&M changing room is so awful I always leave without buying anything. I try to only look in certain ones and ignore ones in shops or my reflection in windows etc. I rather envy people in the pre modern world who would have rarely if ever seen themselves. Nowadays where we see our image in photos and in zoom calls etc its so much worse than ever

I've had the same experience in H&M many times, it's truly depressing.

Their mirrors are so clary-focused though it makes me wonder, are they closest to 'real life'? Sad

menopausalmare · 09/12/2024 06:08

A true mirror should be perfectly flat/ plane. If the mirror is warped it becomes convex or concave like fun house mirrors at fairground@s. Our office had a slightly concave mirror that made me a stone lighter.👍

WhatMe123 · 09/12/2024 06:39

Surely lighting can make a huge difference too. I know i always look tired in my bedroom mirror but look totally different in the bathroom one, I hope the true one isn't the bedroom one 😂

muddyford · 09/12/2024 06:42

HarrietJonesFlydaleNorth · 09/12/2024 05:58

I think an angled full length mirror is more flattering than one that's flat against the wall. So a full length mirror that's leaning against the wall or similar. It does give me a shock when I'm in the shops though and their flat mirrors show the true horror of my knees 😆

At my age, 62, my knees have double chins...

WonderingWanda · 09/12/2024 06:50

I hate mirrors, the ones we have at home lie but at least that makes them more tolerable. When I see myself in photos I am always fatter than I think I am.

CatNoon · 09/12/2024 06:50

My DH in a mirror looks the same to me as he does otherwise, yet I don’t look the same as I think I do when I catch myself out and about in a reflection, shop mirrors, etc. Photos also I look different but I assume the ones from a bit of distance where camera angle isn’t such a factor must be truer to what I really look like?

Dueanamechange2025 · 09/12/2024 06:55

I’ve often thought, I wish I could actually see myself walking down the street to know what I truly look like. I might see someone and think, I wonder if I am the same size and shape as them or if I’m fatter etc.

NearlyNewHip · 09/12/2024 07:00

I tested all mirrors before buying them for my flat!! Only have very flattering ones lol. If I catch myself in any other mirrors, I come home look in my own ones and tell myself 'see, not so bad' !! All in the mind but makes me feel better x

Dadadacolgate · 09/12/2024 07:01

CatNoon · 09/12/2024 06:50

My DH in a mirror looks the same to me as he does otherwise, yet I don’t look the same as I think I do when I catch myself out and about in a reflection, shop mirrors, etc. Photos also I look different but I assume the ones from a bit of distance where camera angle isn’t such a factor must be truer to what I really look like?

When I see my husband in a mirror I'm like who the fuck is that!? He looks so, so different. He looks kind of like himself in photos but only some of them and nothing like himself in a mirror. I can only assume he has a very unsymmetrical face but it looks pretty symmetrical when I look at his actual face 🤷‍♀️

GreyCarpet · 09/12/2024 07:04

The truest reflections are when you catch yourself in a shop window when you don't know it's you.

This is true.

Because when you look at yourself in a mirror, you have already applied a value judgement to what you see. You are already scrutinising your 'worst' feature. Other people don't do that when they see you, they see the whole rather than the sum of its parts..

When you catch a glimpse of that woman whose clothes you like, or who is looking at you or who carries herself well, or who just looks good, in a reflective surface (unexpected mirror/shop window), in that split second before you realise its you and hone in on how awful you look 😉 that's what other people.see.

And it's always better than what you see in any mirror however good it is.

In shops, its usually the lighting that is at fault rather than the mirror itself. But I agree that the M&S one's are awful, which is a shame because I usually get my underwear from M&S 🙈

We have a lovely looking mirror in the living room but no one ever uses it fo check themselves before they go put because, as my daughter says, it's the ugly mirror.

CatNoon · 09/12/2024 07:07

GreyCarpet · 09/12/2024 07:04

The truest reflections are when you catch yourself in a shop window when you don't know it's you.

This is true.

Because when you look at yourself in a mirror, you have already applied a value judgement to what you see. You are already scrutinising your 'worst' feature. Other people don't do that when they see you, they see the whole rather than the sum of its parts..

When you catch a glimpse of that woman whose clothes you like, or who is looking at you or who carries herself well, or who just looks good, in a reflective surface (unexpected mirror/shop window), in that split second before you realise its you and hone in on how awful you look 😉 that's what other people.see.

And it's always better than what you see in any mirror however good it is.

In shops, its usually the lighting that is at fault rather than the mirror itself. But I agree that the M&S one's are awful, which is a shame because I usually get my underwear from M&S 🙈

We have a lovely looking mirror in the living room but no one ever uses it fo check themselves before they go put because, as my daughter says, it's the ugly mirror.

You are already scrutinising your 'worst' feature. Other people don't do that when they see you, they see the whole rather than the sum of its parts..

That is interesting and I hope true. I’m always looking at my double chin 😩

AChickenPooAndABiscuit · 09/12/2024 07:40

MrsTerryPratchett · 09/12/2024 05:17

Weirdly no mirror can be. Because it's always reversed. There's a bloke who makes reversing mirrors but they aren't cheap!

The truest reflections are when you catch yourself in a shop window when you don't know it's you. Because you haven't added meaning to the experience.

I've gone all philosophical!

Surely 'philosophical windows' as a topic deserves a thread all of its own..? Xmas WinkXmas Grin

AChickenPooAndABiscuit · 09/12/2024 07:42

There must be a market for Menopausal Mirrors that make us all look fab even on our worst hormonal days...

Horriblehistoree · 09/12/2024 07:46

Everytime I get my haircut at the hairdressers I think to myself, I’ve never looked so ugly. Something about staring at myself for that length of time, at that angle!

Dadadacolgate · 09/12/2024 07:48

AChickenPooAndABiscuit · 09/12/2024 07:42

There must be a market for Menopausal Mirrors that make us all look fab even on our worst hormonal days...

I've always wondered why there aren't rose tinted mirrors as a standard choice.

GreyCarpet · 09/12/2024 08:07

CatNoon · 09/12/2024 07:07

You are already scrutinising your 'worst' feature. Other people don't do that when they see you, they see the whole rather than the sum of its parts..

That is interesting and I hope true. I’m always looking at my double chin 😩

Show quote history

I once knew a very good looking man.

VERY good looking.

But he lacked confidence and pointed out that his eyes were slightly too close together; his hairline was receding, he was developing a bit of a paunch, his mouth was a bit wonky...

When I looked at him more closely, I could see that he was right. All of those thngs were true!

But, when I looked at him, I just saw a good looking man.

Well, until he pointed out his flaws and I saw him through his own eyes..

That was about 12 years ago and I have never criticised my own looks again since because other people don't scrutinise the minutiae. They see the whole.

I have several examples of this being the case and not just in terms of appearance either.

99point6 · 09/12/2024 08:15

Some hotel bathroom mirrors are the absolute worst for widening. There was one budget chain that had awful ones above the sink but the room was so small couldn't escape its looming presence.

WasThatACorner · 09/12/2024 08:19

All of the mirrors in my house are mean. When I visit my friend I make a point to go look in the mirror at the bottom of her stairs, it's always lovely to me.