AIBU to still be mortified about an embarrassing moment at a friend's house?

[RealAquaCat]

Hi!
About a month ago I got invited to a work colleagues home with some other colleagues for some food and drinks. I was so happy to be invited as I’ve recently moved to a new area and have cliqued well with these colleagues and it’s nice to have made some new friends!
Anyway as we’re chatting, I accidentally swiped my wine glass which was next to me (I was sitting on the floor) - cue the wine glass shattering into a million pieces and wine everywhere 🙈 luckily it was white wine, at least. Some of the food had to be thrown away because of the wine and glass shards, and we all cleaned up together.
I still feel absolutely mortified! It was just a quiet gathering, and I feel like I’ve made an absolute tool of myself and like a drunk mess (I wasn’t even that drunk!)
Of course I apologised a million times and offered to replace the wine glass, and no one has treated me any differently, but it is still haunting me 😩

Is my embarrassing moment really that bad and that embarrassing? When will it stop plaguing my mind?! 😂

If someone did that in my house I wouldn't think twice about it. Accidents happen, I've broken plenty of my own glasses anyway 😄 try not to dwell on it, it's such a none event.

Whenever I start to cringe about some embarrassing moment, I try to remember times other people have humiliated themselves. I never can.

I threw up in my bosses car, that’s way worse 😂

I guarantee you're the only one thinking of this OP. Let it go.

My drunken husband, spilt red wine over a neighbours white upholstered dining chair, got completely drunk at their housewarming party in front of all of our new neighbours and their friends, and hugged the two gay hosts quite a lot.

It was disquieting and very embarrassing at the time, many years ago. I just didn’t recognise him at all, and it was very surprising. I was not drinking.

He doesn’t think of it at all, I should have said. Probably can’t remember it either.

Just forget your accident, it was an accident , and these things happen x

Sorry I went off at such a tangent

The wine/glass incident is an accident that could happen to anyone. I'm sure nobody else is thinking about it anymore.

However I thought it was interesting that you said 'I wasn't even that drunk' - so were you a bit drunk? I'd be wary of getting drunk at a 'quiet gathering' with new friends. Obviously you know the context and people and number of drinks better but I"ve been in situations where there's one or two people drinking to excess in a situation where nobody else is and that really is annoying.

Unless there's something more to this story you're coming across like you could do with talking to someone. It's not normal to be so embarrassed about knocking over a glass of wine. Is it usual for you to take such minor incidents and make them so major in your mind? You sound very anxious.

This

You’re definitely over thinking this!

I think you should be embarrassed by how disappointing this event is! Title of embarrassing moment at a friends house, I was expecting something much more.

In all seriousness, it’s not really embarrassing. We have all done similar and I doubt they have given it a second thought x

Make it into your in joke. Get the host a bottle of wine and matching glass as a Christmas present. And move on.

It's a non event, these things happen.

I suspect they will barely remember the incident if you ask them.

When you host stuff occasionally gets knocked over and broken and you just accept it.

Only time it become remarkable is if it keeps happening! One of my friends is super clumsy and it's a running joke in our friendship group about their accidents. Best one in my house was a bottle of port on my brand new beige carpet. Best one in their own house was a litre bottle of olive oil on their brand new unpolished granite work top which bore a slightly glossy mark for the rest of the time they owned that property.

They also engage in the joke - next time they came round to the beige carpet flat they bought me a red wine removal spray and when I moved I got a household stain removal kit. They've also moved to those riedel wine tumblers at home to reduce the knocking over risk and I tend not to give them a champagne flute even if we are drinking fizz.

You need to get over this, and over yourself. We all break things. We all have mishaps. Be embarrassed if you did it because you were drunk, or because you did it on purpose. Be embarrassed if you'd already been asked not to drink wine in that room, but carried on anyway.

Try watching some episodes of "Keeping Up Appearances" and see what poor Elizabeth went through. That woman suffered big time.

I wish this was the most embarrassing thing I’d ever done.

Yes, I was thinking that too. About me, I mean.

You don't have to beat yourself up about it, but sending flowers or something would have been the thing to do.

I broke 3 of my boss' crystal flute glasses, at his 60th birthday party. He and his wife got them for their wedding. I was not drunk. They were fine about it* but I was absolutely crimson.

• He was. I think she was secretly pretty pissed off but was a good hostess.

Lots and lots of people have these sorts of intrusive thoughts, so YANBU yo have them. Your friends won't care though. And if for some reason they are part of the tiny minority of people who did care, they're dickheads anyway.

Listen to Wheel of Misfortune on BBC Sounds - it will make you feel loads better.

These things happen! That's really not that bad. I understand why you felt embarrassed, but think what your response would be if it happened at your house? You'd reassure them it really didn't matter and clean up, and even if it was a bit annoying about the food you'd want them to stop feeding bad about a silly mistake that anyone could make.

I did that once.

I bought them a nice set of four unbreakable stemless wine glasses and apologized again and they were so thrilled with the gift, I don’t think they thought about my breaking their glass again.

I didn’t ask them if I could replace it, I just did it.

Honestly no one will remember this. It’s huge to you. And not worth a second thought to anyone else!

I had a fantastic moment in a multi agency meeting early on in my career. Back in the day when laptops weren’t a thing and everyone brought paper based notes. About ten people I’d never met round a big table. I went to pour a jug of water and the lid came off and the entire 2L of water emptied all over the table and everyone’s notes. All I could do was laugh. It was mortifying!

In a funny way, it may have made them all feel warmer towards you. You were obviously mortified, but they were kind and supportive about it - and we all love the chance to feel kind and supportive in the right setting, it makes us feel great about ourselves. They probably like you all the more for it!