Women spending Christmas alone, what nice things do you have planned?

[MellowLemur]

I’m spending Christmas by myself this year, and while I know it can feel daunting for some, I’m actually looking forward to it. I think it’s a great opportunity to treat yourself and enjoy some peace.

For anyone else spending the day solo, what are you planning? Whether it’s cooking your favourite meal, a cozy movie marathon, or something completely different, I’d love to hear (and steal some of) your ideas!

@EmeraldRoulette

Well, maybe, but i send myself presents, and don't open the packaging till Christmas Day, and it certainly seems better than nothing.

Christmas is rough for me too. It’s just me and my son. My brother never invites us, and if I invite him, he politely declines. It can be lonely, especially when it seems all the world has many, many people to celebrate with. We will walk doggo, watch Elf, have Viennetta for lunch and call my Auntie in the UK ( we’re in AU). No piles of people, not much socialising. A bit sad, but strangely peaceful.

I generally just ignore it.

Having said that a glass of bubbly in the bath in the morning gives a little buzz that seems to last all day.

In the past I have done marking, decorated a room and spent the day in bed.

Ok So forgive me as I haven't been alone for a long time.

BUT

Sleep in
Food
Series like binge watch.
Bath
Food
Wine
sleep......

Sorry The thought of peace and quiet and sleep Im about to cry.lol

Start your day with the joy that is festive parkrun ! Volunteering is fabulous, or walk or run…add a Santa hat or fancy dress if you want..anything goes 😊

https://www.parkrun.org.uk/special-events/

then everything else already mentioned!

I've asked my friend who will be alone this year (invitation here declined as she's planned her perfect day). She's headed up into the hills (Scotland, weather dependent) for the day with her dog, then home for a bath and an evening of cheese, crackers and wine in front of the telly. Basically same day as she had with her late DH, but alone, and she says she's never not met someone else doing the same.

The most important thing is to not compare your solo Christmas with the imagined 'ideal' big family Christmas.
And remember a lot of people have awful family Christmases. I've had a few myself.

You have spent Christmas alone, but not recently. You spend it with your partner. Your experience of it is due to your mindset. I too will just spend it with my husband. We’re not big fans of it (a festival of consumerism and forced joy), but we do it in our own way. Many people have estrangements. It only damages you to let it dictate your life.

Really? Odfod. Read the room you absolute tool.

😂

And if one more person suggests volunteering with the homeless ...

For me it's the fact that people don't get I want nothing to do with Christmas at all and I'm quite happy spending it alone, doing some nice stuff for myself that isn't festive

No I don't want to eat turkey, why would I when I can have a giant cheese bake and cured meats to myself?
No I don't miss being around loads of people, happy in my own company and from threads on here a lot of it is drama anyway!

I'll be on my own, same as last few years. NC with family.

My approach is to try to keep busy in the lead up, so the day itself feels like a welcome break when it arrives. Keeping busy for me usually means working, but if not it could be cleaning the house, sorting the garden, anything really.

I'll have some decorations up. Some years it's a traditional tree others a bit more paired down (currently a nutcracker, mouse king and small nativity on the mantle, need to decide if a big or small tree going up). The year I didn't bother with decorations at all I felt worse, like I really was on the outside so that didn't work for me.

Presents. A friend and I usually exchange gifts in advance so I'll likely have a small something to open. However, from about October if I see any little treats I fancy I buy them but instead of using I pop in a bag in the wardrobe and open again on Christmas Day. Doesn't have to be big items and usually a new perfume to try (or an old favourite), books, furry slippers ect and I've often forgotten what's in the bag. It is nice to have treats to open and actually ones you want. Plus also helps with an answer if you later get the ubiquitous 'get anything nice for Christmas?' question.

On Christmas Day I get up, shower, do hair and usually into new or clean PJ's and that's me ready for the day. I'll have various food options in to decide what I fancy. Lunch could be anything from baked bread (the easy ready part-baked rolls), with cheese and salad or pizza and garlic bread or even a 'proper' dinner. Crisps, chocolate, Christmas cake and mince pies will also be in the cupboard and all guilt free!

I'll usually find something to watch on TV (those TV magazines are useful to circle anything of interest in advance) and just relax, maybe read a book or have a browse on line and plan holidays or ideas for days out for next year. This is where keeping busy in the run up pays off for me because it's nice just to sit down and take it easy.

No-one knows I'm home alone and I'm vague if asked about plans, as I don't want nosy questions, pity or people feeling obliged to invite me to their own celebrations.

I'm sorry for those on their own and struggling with it - it can feel overwhelming especially if the first time, and there is a lot of commercial focus on the 'perfect' traditional day. Be kind to yourself, have some little treats, don't compare to what you think others are doing and structure the day in whichever way works for you.

Walk the dog then go for a run. Hot shower, chocolate croissants and prosecco whilst a mini roast cooks.
Curl up, do some embroidery, nap, wake up, dog walk and then cheese, wine and chocolate

I have spent Christmases alone recently too. My partner has worked away at Christmas and I have been alone.

I expect I'll have the afternoon and early evening alone. I am fine with being alone. Struggling with why though. Will read this thread fully now as I'm sure it will be full of great ideas.

Sounds lovely 🙂

I understand. My main point though is that you and your partner don’t have to let your family estrangements rob you of pleasure at Christmas. As I said, we’re not very into the OTT of Christmas, but those of us with roofs over our heads and the means to buy nice some nice food etc, can do our own version and have a nice Christmas with the person we love who is with us.

Christmas starts at the solstice. Tidy everything and chuck out rubbish. Change the bed clothes however recently they were out on. Candles and other lights. Get a book want to re-read, like The Box of Delights. On the morning, sit in bed drinking a quiet coffee. Walk a neighbour’s dog. Have breakfast, walk in the valley. Have lunch- whatever I feel like. Read, listen to a play. Bask in the quiet.

I hope you have a good day. Christmas moves are a good chance to get any necessary sobbing out the way and then you can relax!

Thank you.

Just a thought, but if anyone would like it, I am happy to host a session from 12:00 to 1:00pm on Christmas Day on AIBU... we can raise a glass to old friends and family, no longer with us... and share what presents we have discovered under the tree.

In the meantime, I might have a small quilt kit on Etsy, that I am currently pretending I will not buy, but it will be on its way to me in the morning!

I'm stealing all of these ideas to create myself the best Christmas ever!

Yes I agree with this. I already spend every evening at home alone. It’s not a novelty to sit at home by myself watching crap TV or reading my kindle.

Technically I’m not “alone” as I’m a full time carer for my disabled and autistic teenager daughter who rarely comes out her room and will just chuck any presents on the floor once she’s torn off the wrapping paper. I won’t get any presents or any cards as I don’t have any friends or family. I won’t even get a text from anyone! Maybe a “Merry Christmas from Vodafone, have you thought about upgrading?”

But I might as well be alone, in fact it may be worse as she can’t be left unsupervised so I can’t even go for a walk or to church or anything.

At least I have my cat…

I'll be alone. And it's not nice. It's never nice.

Just found this straight after a row with ungrateful late teen and young adult children. Instead of turning myself inside out in an unappreciated effort to make things Christmassy, warm and festive, I would fuck off to the far north of Scotland and car camp for the entire Christmas period. Just me and the dog, if the dog hadn't died last month. The dog was the only one who was actually pleased to see me.
I am a great camp cook so the dog and I would have a decent dinner and walk for miles, then we'd snuggle up under a pile of duvets and blankets and eat treats and listen to the radio until we fell asleep.
I wouldn't have to bother with trying to make anybody happy bar the dog, and he was happy enough just to be with me.

That does sound difficult. I feel so bad for all of the carers who, as you say, have neither good company nor the freedom to self-indulge. I hope you can order yourself nice food or listen to Christmas carols or get some sort of enjoyment out of the season. Take care.