Didnt want to travel in 50mph winds and rain

[Hobbit2108]

My partner of a year lives about 10 miles from me, we were due to go out for a meal at local restaurant/pub, nothing special, just a date night sort of thing. Weather Amber alert was issued for the evening for a named storm, with high winds of 50 mph, heavy rain and 1 degrees. Lots of local events have been cancelled and people advised not to drive unless necessary. I said could we cancel and go another night as I did not want to drive to and from his in such weather in the dark. (He didnt suggest I just drive there and stay over), His response was "you''ll be fine" and he was then off hand and moody with me when I said No, I dont want to risk it. I thought he would be more bothered about my safety than a meal out. And he's read but not replied to my text suggesting an alternative. Theres been a few times when he hasnt shown much concern, if I have been hurt or ill, and it's starting to worry me. Am I unreasonable, should I drive in that weather, am I letting him down ?

Red alert In some parts of country, even had emergency text messages sent out saying to stay in.

I live on a Scottish island. If I didn't go anywhere because it was windy and raining, I'd never go anywhere. 😂

I drove in these conditions today in a fairly rural area... It was fine.

But it would have been nice if he'd offered to come to you

I've gone out twice during recent warnings (because I had to to care for an elderly parent), one time a tree landed just a second after my car had gone past the spot.

And then today a branch fell on the car and although it didn't do any damage it made a huge noise and could easily have shocked someone into crashing

It's "do not drive unless essential" for good reason. You are asking paramedics to also put themselves at risk.

Can't believe all the goady comments on here suggesting people who heed the warnings are being silly

1. The whole country has a storm alert lasting all weekend. When does that ever happen?
2. Someone has already died
3. We are warned not to take unnecessary journeys because it is not safe
4. A tree fell blocking a main A road near my house
5. YANBU - he is.

HTH

I drove Thursday night. There was no alert but the weather was horrendous. Roads were flooded and barely passable. YWNBU given the warnings.

Does it have as many big old trees as other parts of the U.K. ? They're usually the main danger, that and high sided vehicles.

One of the fatalities today was on a road we use frequently, including just yesterday, a tree blew over onto a van.

The fatalities today due to trees weren't in the red zone. 'Only' an amber isn't worth an unnecessary journey.

Very true. Places where very high winds are standard fare throughout winter tend to be treeless or have much smaller trees (obviously, since it's too windy for trees to get big) so if you have a small car you can drive safely in quite strong winds if you are careful of sudden gusts.

I live in a place like this too and it's not comparable. We'd all do well to remember that.

Not many trees here, but it is incredibly exposed, and there are plenty of cliffs to blow over. 😳
In all fairness, when I returned to Essex to visit last spring there was a bit of a storm going on. The amount of tree debris and flying rubbish was quite terrifying, and I lived there 45 years. Herr, if anything can blow away, it usually already has. 😆
Be careful out there. X

Sorry but 10 miles is nothing, I wouldn't change plans for this not very significant weather event. Dh had to drive home in a red warning area rurally 30 minutes due to flight delays and it was absolutely fine.

Wasn’t fine for the people who died from trees falling on their vehicles, was it? Your story is irrelevant.

What do you want though ? He’s being a moody rude sod and you you’re actually considering for a moment if you’re being unreasonable not to drive in this weather.

Two people have died in this storm from falling trees onto their vehicles. You’re right to take it seriously.

He sounds like a bit of a twat.

You’re entitled to cancel or ask for a change of plans whenever you want. For context about the weather, where I live a tree fell on a van and killed the driver yesterday.

I would have 100% cancelled. It’s really not the end of the world if you move date night a few days. He’s being a d**k and I would have at least expected him to say “why don’t I come over and bring/ order food?” Or you could have offered that too.

I’d actually discuss it with him later on when he’s not being childish.

I cancelled yesterday for similar reasons. I would most likely have been fine, but you know what? I'm an adult and decided I'd rather not! Because I'm allowed to make decisions based on my own risk assessments.

If others feel differently they can make the journey and take the risk. If you don't want to, then don't. It's that simple! If the BF calls you names and sulks I think that says more about his nature than yours.

He’s using you for company. He doesn’t care about you as a person, and he should get what’s coming to him—a breakup

Please end it now it is not worth trying with an inconsiderate person. As when you are most vulnerable they won't step up

You didn’t feel happy. That is enough. There have been enough people killed by falling trees in the news over the years to warrant caution. Why put yourself at risk especially driving back in the dark when the weather is bad enough for official warnings. Ignore him. Let him sulk. He should have said not to worry he would come to you.

The number of people saying ‘I did it, and I was fine,’ is hilarious. Plenty of people weren’t fine, got stuck or worse.

"Off hand and moody" is a bit awful. Childish because he doesn't get his own way. Regardless of safety.

YANBU at all. It's your choice, no one else can tell you to go ahead and drive in bad weather if you don't wish to. Look at how many people get themselves into danger, or lose their lives every time there is a storm, it's always all over the news. How many of those people made unnecessary journeys? The rescuers have to put their own lives at risk. I bet they wished they had heeded the stay in advice. Your BF doesn't sound like a caring person. My DH would be worried about me driving late at night in bad weather. Just ignore him, don't contact him and if he contacts you, tell him how you feel.

Listen, I am originally from Spain.
Not sure if you have been following the international news recently but about a month ago there were massive floods in the region of Valencia. 216 people have died.
Well, most of the victims were people who were driving and got swept away by the water.
Granted, flood is not the same as wind. However, going forward I will not ever ignore the warnings from the Met Office.