To ask - what the fuck is the matter with people who do this?

[ClairDeLaLune]

The thread about the infertile son threatening to kill himself and others - it was a troll. What on earth is the motivation for making stuff up like that? It was a really upsetting thread that many people spent time commenting on and trying to help. It addressed mental health issues and could have been triggering for many. Just why do people do this?

I find the psychology behind trolling fascinating. I googled it a while ago and got into some quite interesting articles about the association with sadism and psychopathy.

Attention seeking presumably. I saw that thread, what flagged that it was a troll, looked legit enough?

Maybe mumsnet ought to only let people post after x days after subscription. I can imagine a 13 year old finding it fun to troll. A grownup I would classify as a sociopath.

How do you know it was a troll?

I ask because I have been accused of being a troll and temporarily kicked off Mumsnet by the Mumsnet team in the past. But I really wasn't a troll. People just thought I was and reported me. I think sometimes people's lives are complex and appear unbelievable by some, even when these complex things are really happening in people's lives. In my case (and I have worked on this massively and think I'm better now) I don't always phrase things well and then people make all sorts of assumptions about genuineness etc...

I guess Mumsnet have to make a judgement call as they cannot possibly know someone's intent or if someone's a troll. They likely err on the side of caution and call troll more than trolls exist.

The poster may well not have been a troll.but if people thought they were, Mumsnet may have called it so (and they get it wrong)

Because they have sad lives ? .
Because they like the attention?
Because it makes them feel clever
Validation
So many reasons

I must admit that thread gave me uncomfortable vibes. But I just clicked away, I didn’t report. Who am I to judge someone’s veracity?

I was accused of being a troll , I’d changed some irrelevant details to protect my identity as I have lots of people I know on here
i found it really creepy people were looking up old threads and challenged me in my kids ages and sex ( not reluctant to post )

I used to work on mental health helplines and ‘fake callers’ were a significant part of the role. Feelings towards them were mixed in the team - some found it incredibly frustrating, especially like you say if they’d been taken in and genuinely tried to help, before realising it was made up. For some of us though, me included, it’s a strange and convoluted way to get their needs met. Probably a history of trauma with no one acknowledging their needs and them not believing they can get what they need by expressing what they need straightforwardly.

I still found it meaningful to react to them with compassion as they probably needed it; that approach isn’t wasted. That said, they were rightly prevented from monopolising time when there were people having real crises that needed it.

Such a dangerous thread too considering what they said he was threatening to do.

Maybe a previously banned poster/

A power trip? They are in control of a situation and making people dance to their tune.

I saw that last night. It was a very disturbing read and so many replies trying to be kind and genuine. I always assume it’s boredom and attention seeking, though there are some individuals who tip into fetish on certain topics (usually bodily functions, bizarrely).

Sadly I now assume everything in Aibu or chat is embellished at the very least, if not an outright nonsense. Which is a shame for posters looking for genuine advice.

I think it's got to be for attention.
Like the thread last week about a couple taking his ex wife's child with another man on holiday with them and their children so she wasn't left out. Loads of posters were saying how good and decent they were until it was found to be a work of fiction.

It is very strange. Years ago a close family member was killed in a very public accident. Speaking to the family liaison officers afterwards, they were saying how the amount of fake calls to the police incident helpline was unexpectedly high and took a massive amount of resources to deal with - think reporting your loved one missing and possibly involved in a incident where it took days to recover the dead.

Following on from that it was also amazing the amount of people who posted online about loosing a family member (or a boyfriend seemed very common) on memorial pages where it was obvious that it was not true, given that the family's at this point all knew each other through months of court hearings. it was all so bizarre, and made a horrible time even harder for everyone involved

Mumsnet said it was a PBP, so I was going by that. Agree that often they’re hard to spot though, or people get accused of being them when they’re not.

I found it very disturbing too having suffered from infertility and dark thoughts (not murderous) myself. What sort of sick mind does that for attention?

I get why people say it’s for attention, but I can’t understand what fulfillment it gives to have attention for something made up. Like if you all compliment me for something I’ve done I’d feel good, but for something I haven’t done? How could that make me feel any satisfaction? It’s utterly bizarre to me.

I can only think maybe people get off on feeling they’ve fooled others. Again, no idea why that would feel good.

It seems to be less of a thing now (probably because these people can go on forums like MN now) but i used to wonder the same about those scam email/facebook posts. You know the ones - someone would go to the trouble of creating a fake letter from the local police force warning the public about some terrible criminal gang..... and it was all completely fake. And it really used to throw me becuase when you looked up the story, it had inevitably been rolling around for years, in multiple cities or even countries, but the one that was popping up on my facebook would be dated last week, with my local police force's details... so someone had found this, then gone to the trouble to adapt/edit it for local use, then started spamming it out there.

It's really odd and mind blowing to me.

Also frustrating - pretty much every single person in DH's family would buy into those ones!!!

@SunshineSky81 Following on from that it was also amazing the amount of people who posted online about loosing a family member (or a boyfriend seemed very common) on memorial pages where it was obvious that it was not true, given that the family's at this point all knew each other through months of court hearings. it was all so bizarre, and made a horrible time even harder for everyone involved

This never makes any sense to me, why would you wish something so terrible onto yourself?
I've known a couple of people die unexpectedly, one of whom was tragically young and a couple of people who barely knew the deceased but clamoured about, claiming to be the most upset and grief stricken was sickening to watch.

I saw someone that I know (vaguely) trolling on Facebook once- he said some vile things about a disabled child. I can confirm that he is exactly what you’d expect a troll to be like. Lives with his mum at the age of 40, no job or girlfriend, difficult and unpleasant personality and basically a sad unhappy person with nothing better to do than make other people feel as bad about themselves as he does. I do now imagine that all trolls are similar and are basically deeply unhappy horrible people that deserve pity more than anything.

Obviously some people do it for attention.

However being older and having seen plenty of life there are some stories that I personally know are true that do seem like they could be made up. As they say truth is often stranger than fiction.

How MN allegedly know people are trolls baffles me, unless they can actually investigate a story by collecting evidence.

I mean I could write I’m 32 and single with blonde hair, none if that is true but how would they know.

I know "oh school holidays" often gets cited but I honestly think very few of them are teenagers mucking about.

I guess they can look into posting history, but someone could always create a new logon - if they were that determined to be an utter weirdo…

There are some very fucked up individuals who walk amongst us. The internet is the perfect place for them to indulge their sick minds. Trolling can be very damaging, and there should be consequences for people who repeatedly use chat and social media sites in this way - I don't know what, some sort of restricted internet access maybe.

There is all sorts of trolling. It isn’t limited to straight out aggression and hate. People make up stories and post them all the time. It can be to get attention and interaction for themselves personally or for a political position or to start an argument.

Social media is full of false information and stories. Do not use what you read here or elsewhere to form opinions. You are very likely reading a shaggy dog story. The more flowery and dramatic the language the more likely it is to be made up. The more rambling and detailed filled the more likely it is to be made up.

There are also posters whose story is probably a very one sided and self serving narrative. They are using the forum to validate their behaviour and position.