Why is referring to an OP's previous posts considered A Bad Thing?

[JFDIYOLO]

Just that, really.

AIBU to think it makes perfect sense and allows a more realistic response?

An OP posts a question, asks opinion and advice.

People do them the courtesy of spending time thinking about it and writing an answer.

A poster mentions they've looked at their previous posts which contain a lot of pertinent info, back story, repeated incidents etc etc which weren't included in the current post.

This informs the advice they then give.

Why have I so often seen others haranguing them for going down the previous (entirely public) posts?

It seems very sensible - to get the facts before wading in to answer something that only gives a fragment of the true picture.

What do you think?

It depends - with the relationship ones, it’s often really useful to see that it isn’t just the poster’s DH not picking his socks up, it’s the fact that he won’t pick his socks up or allow her to leave the house without his permission. Which obviously totally changes the advice.

Or a fantasist who is asking for advice about claiming benefits as a single mother on one thread, and boasting about her DH’s Big Job and their mansion in Surrey in another.

"Oops, I've accidentally posted on my auntie's/boss's/cat's account; we share a computer and she must have still been logged in!"

It’s usually when you are pretty sure you recognise the poster. I don’t advanced search everyone, you are right that would be ridiculous.

I don't think it's useful when done as a gotcha, because people change details

I do think it's useful when someone has been given loads of responses but just got an answer they didn't like and are trying again.

Advance Searching someone takes a lot of effort and I don't think I have ever bothered but when it is done, it's interesting in scenarios where it isn't done in a goady way.

I personally can’t be arsed with it, don’t have the time or inclination to do it myself, but I do find it interesting when others have done it and mention it in the post sometimes as I have seen some where the additional info someone had found from doing it actually totally reframed the post and suddenly with that extra info most posters then change/take back their advice.

Or as others have said where someone has posted the same thing multiple times as they clearly didn’t like the answers the first time, seeing that would be helpful as saves wasting time reading and replying when it’ll only pop back up.

I think it's fair enough when it's on one of the quieter boards where you recognise a lot of the posters. Someone did it to me, and I wouldn't have minded except that they had completely misread what I had written.

It’s also useful when people are obvious trolls - there was a poster about a year ago called Distinguished Social Commentator or something, who essentially posted goady threads under very slightly different usernames (slightly mis-spelled in different ways), such as “should cyclists be rounded up and shot? Discuss!” “Poor people - are they all criminals? Discuss!” “Women - are their brains inherently inferior to men’s? Discuss!” and then sat back and enjoyed the fireworks.

I used to point out their posting history when I saw them because I don’t think they were posting in good faith. MN never banned them, unfortunately - I assume they got bored.

I've done it before if I think the poster is coming across as a bit of a twat to see if that's how they always across. Also, if the thread is ridiculous to see if they are maybe a troll.

@Saschka
I remember that poster!

I left another forum a couple of years back because I had a "covid stalker"... I made that HUUUUUUUUUGGGE mistake of changing my mind.

In 2020 had the same view as many... how can the vaccine be trusted, untested, pushing it out quickly to all etc... then the science moved on and they explained stuff that made sense to me... so I changed my view.

OMG someone stalked me through 200 threads saying "well how can we trust a word you say (about anything, including on one memorable occasion how to do blanket stitch!) when in 2020 you said this and 2021 you said totally the opposite".

So anyone doing the stalkery stuff gets short shrift from me now.

A lot of people (me included) will share experiences but change details.

So I might change the ages or gender of my children for example. Not if it's relevant to what I'm posting, but often it isn't.

So someone reading all my posts might go - ab you're making it all up in this post you had two kids and they were how old and in this post you have three and they are younger!

You shouldn't use Mumsnet as a substitute for proper advice anyway but it is bloody useful for dealing a lot of common situations.

"My sister and I share an account" in response to a similar situation of first time mum with 7 month old vs multiple adult children/step children previous posts.

I think that unless absolute contradiction is discovered (in which case report it to MNHQ and then leave the thread), then the poster searching needs to keep it to themselves as it has a tendency to scare the OP off, even if it can be perfectly justified or PP has misread/misunderstood something on a previous thread they found - either way, the OP quite often disappears….quite understandably….And it always ruins the thread. Every time

I have alot of stuff going on in my life and at times some of the things are quite identifying, I rely on MN alot so do post often

So I would often change details like the number of kids I have, or the sex of my children, the ages, what part of the country I live in etc
And a few times I was pulled up on it as 'lying' or being a troll

When explained to MN they've understood but I really couldn't be doing with it so name change instead very regularly

It’s not normally done with good intentions. It’s normally a but ahaha you’ve said this or your family do this or it was a girl last month now your child’s a boy your a troll.

When people are just trying to stay anonymous when say gender helps keepannon, what your family did or does has no baring on your question because you hated farmers a year ago doesn’t mean you haven’t changed your opinion since.

The only time it’s genuinely useful is when people are asking the same question but tweeking to get the response they want.

My dss hates me, Ive no idea why how can I fix it…. two months earlier dss overheard me calling his mum a slut and a whore and I stand by those comments she has 5 kids with 5 dads and lives on bennyfits … well that would explain it.

Someone did it to me with a big 'a-ha' type flourish, only to realise she was wrong. I was talking about my DC mentioned their ages and she'd gone back and looked at another post where I'd put their school years and decided I was lying. I wasn't, as a lot of posters pointed out before I could even respond the years and ages did match up.

I was a bit put out as I was asking advice and it derailed the thread a bit. Thing is most people probably do change minor details anyway, I don't see that as a big deal.

There was a recent thread for example where someone posted that her daughter had a horrendous accident at school, suspected broken back, definite broken leg. Lots of sympathy and advice and handholding. Turns out she had posted in August about a daughter also breaking her leg...MN took the recent thread down 'to look behind the scenes'.

Its creepy, stalky and way overinvested.

There's nothing stalkerish, they've put all the information out on a public forum. If you're going to embellish your stories, remember your lies!

It's usually troll hunting, but if you think it's not genuine you're meant to report and let Mumsnet deal with it.
Is Advance search is for ppl who've subscribed? Never used it

Some posters will post a situation over and over again because they didn't like the advice they got the first (and second, and third...) time.

It can be helpful then to point this out as they are basically wasting everyone's time and have no intention of taking - or even reading - the advice that people take time to post

I voted YABU because I only ever see it used to be nasty, to prove a point, to get one over someone. To be unpleasant basically.

There was a poster in the step parenting section who obviously didn't want her BF to have a relationship with his daughter and instead wanted him to just be a parent to her kids. It was disturbing the lengths she was going to trying to get the poor kid kicked out of her dad's house because she didn't want the step daughter to ruin her new family setup. She kept creating new threads asking for advice but omitting key bits of information so she could appear more sympathetic.

She was essentially trying to alienate a child and posters kept getting suckered in. That was until other posters started linking her previous threads and holding her to account.

In that case it was positive because it wasn't enabling the alienation of a child or validation of abuse.

How do you even see someone's previous posts??? I can never seem to work that out!

Copy and paste the user name Into the search bar and select posts or threads or both.