To wish DH was not working from home on my day off?

[greatbellofbow]

Rare day off awarded as a goodwill gesture. And DH is working from home. Which means I will spend the day feeling like I’m in the way in my own home!

A proper deep clean that takes so much time and requires so many things to be moved that it would bother someone trying to work is surely quite rare? Quickly going round with the hoover or giving the bathroom a once over shouldn't take that much time or be especially intrusive. If we really need to turn the house upside down to sort it out, we'll find a time we're both free because I'm not doing that by myself!

I say just put Bluetooth headphones on and crack on with the carols and cleaning. Pretend he's not there . If he needs anything, he can sort himself out!
While I hate doing a deep clean I do really enjoy the result, so I don't think it's a waste of a day, more of an investment for future days!

It might be rare but it does need doing especially if the house is a pit. So saying it’s rare yes, agreed, it doesn’t mean it never needs doing, so when would you do it?

I'm completely with you. I would rather my husband was in the office when I'm not working.

I know what you mean about wanting the place to yourself occasionally, but if I were planning to clean and put music on I could do that with DH WFH no problem. He hunkers down in an upstairs bedroom, the warmest and quietest spot in the house.

If he becomes aware of me scrubbing the oven he'd just say thank you.

Like I said, a time when both DP and I are free to do it together. Probably the weekend. If time is really that limited just do it room by room on different days.

I'm with you op, though as my husband always works from home it's always the case for me! I would get some blue tooth headphones for the carols though. I manage to clean with my proper overhead ones, hate the in ear ones they always seem to drop out.

I work from home most days and I'll be very annoyed if you want me out of the house because it's your day off. It's very selfish of you.

I’ve been known to book a day off to deep clean and get the house sorted. Means my weekend can then be enjoyed.

I find it awkward if one of us is WFH whilst the other has a day off. Whilst we’ve got a home office, I’m always worried about making too much noise and disturbing DP. However he has no qualms about disturbing me and will regularly ask what time I’ll be finished etc.

Did dh know your plans to take a day off and deep clean and say 'don't care' and still work from home?
Had he already planned to work from home and you've chosen this day?

For some people it's their only chance

I know I sound nitpicky here but I’m guessing you don’t have preschool children then, or if you do you have someone who would look after them while you and DH clean together.

I honestly am not trying to be horrible but being scathing about others’ life choices isn’t fair. The house needs cleaning and I get precious little opportunities to do it. Believe me I’d love to spend my day off chilling out as well but if it had to be spent doing housework I’d far rather do housework without DH there working!

Hh

Our toddler "helps" us with the cleaning. He loves to waddle around with his dustpan and brush 🤣

That being said I do understand what you mean, I love DP but I also love being home alone sometimes.

DH has had a table and pc set up in the living room for the past four years as there is nowhere else in the house he could go. I used to have a precious two hours a week on my early finish day where I could have the house to myself, and have not had that for four long years. It has drained me. I feel your pain OP.

Bees I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen this on MN and great if it works but my toddler when I’m cleaning is an absolute liability.

(actually my toddler is a liability full stop.)

I feel like this. I'm the one WFH but usually have the house to myself but DH has less work on at the moment (seasonal worker) so he is here a lot more and it drives me crazy. I don't think it's a relationship issue I just think it's me, I'm an introvert and love time to myself. I can do what I want when I want without considering anyone else. Have a cup of tea or lunch when I want, have what I want on the radio. I like different food to DH and sometimes it's nice to just have egg on toast or something and not have to have what he is having, he'll make me a lovely salad which is nice but not what I want.

Yeah that sort of thing sounds lovely but lasts about 5 mins before my toddlers (older now) would start causing chaos

I'm with you on that OP.

It's not my husband. It's my husband's work persona, and him leaving icky working vibes all over the place whenever he leaves the office.

And, dear god, the pandemic meant that I learned what his work laugh sounds like.

It really isn’t. Get an office. Don’t be so selfish.

It isn’t ‘my day off’ as in a regular thing, it’s a day I’ve been ‘given’ by work as a goodwill gesture.

I haven’t told DH to go to the office or anything so I have no idea why you think I’m being selfish? Secretly wishing something isn’t selfish is it, or is it!?

I bought a house to live and relax in with my DH, not an office.

Totally get this! For some ppl absolute alone time is precious. I didn't realise I was one of those till DH started working away 4 days a week & though 4 days was too long, I really REALLY enjoyed daytimes when everyone was at school/college. I liked no one talking to me easily as much as I like the fact my two teen DS don't stfu from the moment they get in till about 11pm.

Everyone is different & that's fine, there's no wrong answer & it doesn't mean you love him less than anyone who declares you unreasonable.

DH just got made redundant (wankers) & though I'm glad he's not going to be away all the time I'm also wondering when my quiet time is going to be cos HE DOESN'T SHUT THE FUCK UP EITHER 😭🤣.

But it's our house not your office...

Could say it's selfish for you to want us to have be worried about your work on our day off...

This is so much like me. I always feels lazy if my DH is around and I sit down because he rarely does, He has absolutely no issue with it but I do.