To be upset no one ever looks after me when I am sick?

[Yourpy]

I am an adult living with my parents due to living in London and saving up for a deposit. My brother also lives at home right now whilst he studies for his masters.

My brother was sick a few days before I caught whatever he had. In that time I gave him a heated blanket, brought him tea and toast and cooked his favourite meal. I genuinely enjoy caring for people.

Now I have been in bed for the past two days and not a single person has even checked up on me.

It just makes me sad.

I know I’m a grown up and it’s just a cold but a mug of hot chocolate would be such a kindness

He should have returned the favour.
Why haven’t your parents checked in on you? Presumably you haven’t been in the same house for two days and not seen/ spoken to them?

My dad is a busy body - always in and out the house. Can’t sit still. He owns a business so always on the go. I barely see him.

And my mum is in her study all day too working on a model for work with classic fm blaring. I’m in the attic room so I guess somewhat separated from them. They can definitely hear me sneezing and coughing though. Parents always go out in the evenings to their friends’ homes at the weekend.

I think that's really sad OP.
There are regular shocking threads on MN where the OP is ill and her partner or DH is totally uncaring and unhelpful and expects her to carry on as normal.
But I think your is the first I've read where the OP's parents and DB have appeared to be so uncaring. It just defies natural decency that people can ignore an ill person in their own house.

Hope you are feeling better soon OP.

You need to talk to your brother at least, you took care of him, caught his bug and he has not even considered to check on you, his behaviour is appalling.

Yes, tell your brother! Phone or text him if necessary.

There’s nothing specifically that I want from him. I have no appetite. Just a head round the door checking on me would be nice and thoughtful. And knowing there’s not a single person on the planet to give me that makes me want to cry.

Thank you. I think today will be the worst day and from tomorrow I should start improving.

You say you're an adult??
Dramatic much?

Appalling.

Its a bug for goodness sake? He couldn't have been that ill if he ate his favourite meal!

So text or call him and ask him to check on you periodically? Likewise your parents, especially if they're either working from home, or in and out a lot? They're not psychic, OP. My sole desire when I'm ill is to be left alone to fester. They may think that's what you prefer.

Oh come on, the poor thing is full of lurgy! Don't you feel self-pitying and weepy when you're ill?

She just wishes someone would check on her or bring her a cuppa and a paracetamol.

Did your parents care for your brother when he was ill or were they just as indifferent to his needs as they are yours? Is that why you had to step up and care for him?

The poor thing??
I take 2 paracetomol and crack on!
I'd love to be left alone to wallow!

@Lanzarotelady wind your neck in. Most people feel sorry for themselves when they're ill, but it must feel even worse for the OP. She showed concern and love for her brother, who apparently hasn't given her a second thought - and that is particularly bad when 1) he knows how shit she feels because he's already had that bug, and 2) he's the one who gave it to her!

Haha, you wind your neck in, its a bug for goodness sake! You can feel sorry for yourself without expecting to be waited on hand and foot!

I hardly want to be waited on hand and foot. I just want to come to me and ask “are you okay?”. If you don’t throw a loved one a bone when they are poorly then what’s the point?

i have a banging headache, body aches (feel like I’ve been hit by a bus), sore throat, temperature sneezing and chapped lips from mouth breathing.

I don’t see any value in minimising my symptoms and believing I should push through. I’m resting. And have barely spoken to a human in days.

That's quite histrionic in itself, tbf.

In your haste to jump down OP's throat, you've spectacularly missed the point. She's already says she doesn't want anything in particular from him as she has no appetite. She's just become aware of the discrepancy in their relationship, one sibling gives a shit, the other doesn't. It's not about being 'waited on hand and foot', it's about kindness.

I'd ask whoever is in the house if they would bring you one, and say you hope to feeling better tomorrow, but would really appreciate that kindness today.

I can understand that you'd like someone to have a little chat about your symptoms and bring you hot drinks. Anyone would while they're ill. Ask them - text your brother and your mum, or however you contact her. If you all live fairly separate lives they may hardly have noticed that you're not around and your normal self.
Hope you feel better soon.

How old are you OP?

I have adult DC at home and I always check on them if ill. Sometimes they don't like me fussing but at the very minimum, I bring them Lemsip, soup, tea and toast. YANBU.

I would just ask your mum to bring you a cup of hot choc. It's not a huge ask. As for your brother, ignore him the next time if he is sick.

That’s very thoughtless of your family. Was it like this when you were a child too?

I'm a bit conflicted.

On the one hand I feel a bit sorry for you because you looked after your brother and probably wanted care in return (lesson 1 - only help people if you genuinely want to help, and never expect kindness to be repaid, ever). You feel sad your mum and dad haven't popped their heads round the door.

On the other hand, it does just sound like a bad cold which isn't really the end of the world and a lot of adults (rightly or wrongly) pish through such things. You sound like you are probably an adult, maybe in 20s or 30s(?) and your parents are kindly having you and your brother living at home again, and maybe they assumed if you need them you'll come and ask.

Is there some history here OP?? How long have you been back home? Do you pay rent? Do you help with household chores? Do you and your parents normally get on? What was childhood like? Is there a back story?