Aibu to stop this multiple Christmas day madness?

[Sugargliderwombat]

So we have toddlers and babies in the family now, and we seem to be settling into a routine that I think is odd but wondering if IABU to basically stop the tradition from next year.

To account for multiple adults who work over Christmas (none of whom have children) we seem to have ended up doing 3 seperate Christmas days that cater for them. So my side I have to do boxing day, my OH side is Christmas eve and then Christmas day on our own. But instead of being them joining in with Christmas eve or boxing day we are doing 3 full bloody Christmases, that is madness going forwards, right?

You do the whole works on one day (doesn't necessarily have to be Christmas day). You can do a Boxing Day meal which is not the whole works but is nice but not necessary. And you also have the glory of left overs day maybe with a zero faff beige buffet to pad it out.

Three Christmas Dinners. Ugh no thanks. Not only would I be waddling but it's actually not nice or fun.

Or you can go down the mad theme - why not have a Chinese day. Or a more 'boring' plain lasagne or Bolognese but do a murder mystery or something.

I swear most people just are totally lacking in imagination for Christmas and think until you don't tick certain boxes it not good enough!

Depending on work schedules (only me who has to work over Christmas period) we have Christmas day just us then head to family for Boxing Day. Boxing Day tends to be full on roast (even if they've also eaten it the day before); either that or we go to the local Indian restaurant which is amazing. For us at home though we don't do a full Christmas dinner. Can't remember exactly when it started, definitely when dc were very small, but we do 'party food', just wanging trays of things in the oven as and when we feel like it. Much more relaxed. Don't feel like I'm missing out when I have to go out for work in the same way I would if I had to get up and leave halfway through a big meal (plus I'm not too fat to bend over/too sleepy to drive!).
Actually first Christmas as parents dh & I had fish fingers, chips & beans

As a mature adult without kids, I wouldn't mind this, but in your shoes I would hate it. You'll all be frazzled and exhausted.

I think three occasions is ok, but three full christmas dinners consecutively is madness!

Christmas Eve naice dinner and fizz
Christmas Dinner (or not as it’s just you guys)
Boxing Day buffet (or dinner if you forego it on the 25th).

Or indeed full dinner on Christmas Eve, we often do this. But just one full roast!

Of course it isn't standard. Do you have Christmas Day three days in a row?

Just do "Christmas dinner" on Christmas eve with the relatives, Christmas day give your kids (I'm guessing younger than school age?) Whatever they normally eat, something easy and treaty, then Boxing Day do buffet/ deli food

I actually want a TV series like 'dont tell the bride' which goes into peoples homes and make them do Christmas differently rather than boring Christmas by numbers.

THIS!

This is literally peak mumsnet.

think of the vicar of dibley
i would definitely ring the changes though

In my house if you were working (husband police inspector) we either had early or late lunch to fit with shifts or, if not, I had both sets of parents and did it on my own with daughter acting as waiter and he just missed it. I've a lovely photo of Mr TorroFerney eating his dinner after parents had gone, one year on his own wearing a party hat, bare table as the candles , napkins etc had been cleared. He would have Christmas meal at work, kebab or indian so arguably better than Christmas lunch!

What was slightly different with us is there's no one else who would host and we also never do anything on boxing day.

Difference as well from reading a lot of these posts was just that this was done with little fuss, both from him who had chosen a job with shifts and me who had married someone who worked them.

And on every thread about childless people having to work over Christmas there are numerous responses about how adults can just have the celebration another day.

Christmas Eve is fish and Boxing day leftovers.

That's always been the norm for me and Christmas Eve is my favourite so I'd resent missing out on it for the first of three massive roasts

I don’t think it’s so unusual to see family that work on other days than Xmas day. Or exchanging gifts from those other family members on days other than Xmas day.

If you know your mil will do a full Xmas dinner on Xmas eve then I wouldn’t do a big family dinner for your little family on Xmas day. So picky bits - whatever you fancy - on Xmas day. Open all the gifts from Santa or yourselves on Xmas day and do whatever you want on the day. Then do your big meal on Boxing Day with your extended family- perhaps a ham or beef if you are sick of turkey. Gifts from that side of the family can be exchanged and opened on Boxing day. I think it’s good for children to learn how to be flexible about how Xmas goes. And nice that presents are spread out over a few days. So many people grow up with a stick up their backsides when it comes to Xmas.

Me and DH have both worked Christmas. Whichever side had one of us plus DS always puts the other a plate up. Only DH works Christmas now but we host on another day if he's at work it's usually buffet or Christmas sandwiches.

My preference if it works shift wise is lunch on Christmas Eve (lunch time or evening) so Christmas is more social and not kitchen based.

Some of this is totally in your hands OP. So that everyone gets at least one Christmas dinner, but you don’t get three, why don’t you cook something different on Christmas Day?

May I suggest this, Op?

We have done this but not 3 consecutive days, no one wants that many Christmas dinners! Sheet the point is to see each and spend time together at Christmas, not to have a roast

Main thing is if you want to do the family days in a row, we've not gone full on like that and instead spaced it out over the week which is easier to manage if the menu ends up very similar

We have inlaws on Christmas day, my family on boxing day. Yes we have two full meals. Yes we have two sets of presents. No we don't pretend Santa visited twice that would be very strange 😅 but spreading out the family presents works quite well?

Christmas day there is a lot more playing with new toys etc and on boxing day we go for a walk. So the days are not identical.

It's not all that unusual. With different family locations & schedules, everybody wants to 'do Christmas'. By the time you've added in work Christmas, schools & clubs Christmasses, Christmas with friends and/or down the pub, you can easily end up having 7 or 8 turkey dinners over the season 😬

I agree your safest approach is to something different on the day you host - even if it's a different roast (to give everyone the 'Christmas dinner' experience) you'll get a break from the turkey!

Well when you're having your Christmas at home, don't have a roast...

3 Christmas dinners in a row is a lot, however We do do 3 days though as multiple of us work the Christmas period.

It tends to work out my side Xmas eve (buffet/ charcuterie that type of thing) Xmas day at home- full dinner- family are welcome to visit morning/afternoon as they please, Boxing Day at the in laws which is cold cuts, pickles, chips, crusty bread. We exchange gifts that go out to family prior to Christmas Day so that everyone has their gifts on Christmas Day.

To be fair if you are at home the middle day you don't have to do a full Christnas dinner thereafter having one the day before and after.

Do your parents cook Xmas dinner too? How does your mum feeling sorry lead to your making dinner for everyone?!

Is it just you/DH/kids on Christmas Day? If it is I'd do something easy on Christmas Day not a full Christmas roast, anything easy that can all be preprepared like a curry or a cottage pie or some. Have a fun Christmas Day with the children and have the traditional food on Christmas Eve and Boxing Day.